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  #1  
Old 08-05-2012, 06:37 AM
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Posticon Paper Toll The Bells.

"Toll The Bells"
written by: Grim


The great Guardian of the Sky
forevermore you fly
on pandemonium's breath are wicked spells
It is you for which we toll the bells

Over the land it races
from here to far away places
Tis the voice of the Northern Winds
In the midst of chaos, turmoil and strife
Ho-oh brought it back to life

Erupting from far below
Tis the roar of the volcano
In the midst of chaos, turmoil and strife
Ho-oh brought it back to life

Tis the cry of thunder
that we listen to in wonder
In the midst of chaos, turmoil and strife
Ho-oh brought it back to life

The great Guardian of the Sky
forevermore you fly
on pandemonium's breath are wicked spells
It is you for which we toll the bells
In the midst of chaos, turmoil and strife
the sacred fire of the rainbow will bear new life. . .
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  #2  
Old 08-20-2012, 03:37 AM
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Default Re: Toll The Bells.

This is phenomenal! :D It seems like it's orated by a omniscient being. For some reason it reminds me of Slowking from Pokemon 2000. Nonetheless, it's really good.

The Suicune Stanza has one extra line than Entei's and Raikou's and that throws the stanza off a bit. The other paragraphs are four lines and have a balanced flow, but the line "Tis the voice of the Northern Winds." seems a bit awkward. However, you may have treated Suicune differently because Suicune's role is a little more exclusive and prominent in the games, as opposed to Entei and Suicune. But still, the rhyme imbalance is a little troubling.

Nonetheless, it's an excellent poem!
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Old 08-21-2012, 03:35 AM
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Default Re: Toll The Bells.

Thank you. ^_^

Yea Suicune's stanza is a bit longer for that very reason, it played a much more significant role in both the anime and in the games. When I began my research on the lore of Ho-Oh and the legendary beasts to write this poem, I found more lore on Suicune then any of the other beasts so I incorporated that into the poem by making its stanza a bit longer then the others. When writing poems on ancient Pokemon, I like to have the poem sound as if it's being orated by an old storyteller of the ancient Pokemon World time period; I find it very fitting to have an ancient story be told by an old storyteller haha. The rhyme scheme of this poem was a bit tough to tackle and half way through I decided that there was no way I could tell the story I wanted to tell and have it all rhyme without it sounding off somehow, so I decided some parts would free style and the parts I could rhyme I would do so. I'm really glad you liked the poem, I have a few more of my works up on here in the poetry section, so feel free to take a look at them as well and let me know what you think. =)
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Last edited by Grim; 08-21-2012 at 03:37 AM. Reason: Mispelled word.
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