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Change the Christmas Carols

Eeveelution

Among the few morons with straight A's.
Yep, you all know the classic Christmas Carols. (Or at least, if you live in an area where Christmas is revered and there are a bunch of Christmas specials on TV.) They include "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer", "Frosty the Snowman", "Jingle Bells", etc. I recently came up with a revised version of "Jingle Bells, Batman Smells" using teachers' names. ("Jingle bells, 'F' smells, 'IM' laid an egg..." Used initials rather than names.) I figured, "Why not?" and figure we should post our own revised versions of classic Christmas carols. Try not to choose one too religious, though, to avoid controversy. Anyways, just post the craziest one you can think of, but try to retain the holiday spirit.
 
Tis the season to be violent,
fa la la la la, la la la la
T'hell with peace and being silent
fa la la la la, la la la la
Grab a chainsaw and machine gun,
fa la la, la la la, la la la
Go on killing sprees and have fun,
fa la la la la, la la la la~
 
um,

Randolf the bow-legged cowboy
had a very shiny gun
and if you ever saw it
you would surely scream and run
all of the other cowboys
used to laugh and call him names
they never let poor randolf
join in any shooting games
then one foggy Christmas Eve
the sherrif came to say
Randolf with your gun so bright
won't you shoot my wife tonight~


HA-HA-HARDY-HAR-HAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Laugh you incompetent fool!
 
Didn't make this... It's on my IPod.
Jingle Bombs

"Hi Acman." "Greetings, Infernal Jeff & Guitar Guy."
"So, how's your guitar playing coming?" "I'm pretty good now! Right, Guitar Guy?"
"Ya, I heard you practicing. You sound great. Why don't you guys do a song?"
"Ok. Here we go."
*Music from Jingle Bells starts*
Dashing through the sand, with a bomb trapped through my back, (I don't know, ok? It's hard to hear the lyrics.)
I have a nasty plan, for Christmas is Iraque.
I go through checkpoint A, but not through checkpoint B,
thats when I got shot in the ass by the US military.
Oh, Jingle Bombs, Jingle Bombs, mine blew up you see,
Where are all the virgins that *Inaudible speech (To me. @.@)
Eh! Jingle Bombs, Jingle Bombs, you just shot me dead,
The only thing that is a towel on my head.
"Very nice." "Yes, but now we get to the interesting part. Guitar Guy, let's see what you got."
*Guitar Solo*
"Oh man, Guitar Guy's really good." "Not bad, but listen to this."
*Evil Guitar Solo*
"Heh heh heh heh heh! Eat my strings Guitar Guy! Maybe you should practice a little, eh?"
I used to be a man, but every time I *Inaudible Speech* Thanks to Uncle Sam, my nuts keep falling off!
My bombing days are done, *Inaudible speech* Perhaps it would be much safer a a * Inaudible word* store nut clerk!
Oh! Jingle Bombs, Jingle Bombs, I think they got screwed,
Don't laugh at me because I will kill you.
Heh Heh Heh Heh heh! I kill you!
Merry Christmas!


Sorry for the inaudible speech! I couldn't understand it.
 
Last edited:
Didn't make this... It's on my IPod.
Jingle Bombs

"Hi Acman." "Greetings, Infernal Jeff & Guitar Guy."
"So, how's your guitar playing coming?" "I'm pretty good now! Right, Guitar Guy?"
"Ya, I heard you practicing. You sound great. Why don't you guys do a song?"
"Ok. Here we go."
*Music from Jingle Bells starts*
Dashing through the sand, with a bomb strapped to my back,
I have a nasty plan, for Christmas is Iraq.
I go through checkpoint A, but not through checkpoint B,
thats when I got shot in the ass by the US military.
Oh, Jingle Bombs, Jingle Bombs, mine blew up you see,
Where are all the virgins that ben laden promised me?
Eh! Jingle Bombs, Jingle Bombs, you just shot me dead,
The only thing that is left is the towl upon my head.
"Very nice." "Yes, but now we get to the interesting part. Guitar Guy, let's see what you got."
*Guitar Solo*
"Oh man, Guitar Guy's really good." "Not bad, but listen to this."
*Evil Guitar Solo*
"Heh heh heh heh heh! Eat my strings Guitar Guy! Maybe you should practice a little, eh?"
I used to be a man, but every time I *Inaudible Speech* Thanks to Uncle Sam, my nuts keep falling off!
My bombing days are done, *Inaudible speech* Perhaps it would be much safer a a * Inaudible word* store nut clerk!
Oh! Jingle Bombs, Jingle Bombs, I think i got screwed,
Don't laugh at me because I will kill you.
Heh Heh Heh Heh heh! I kill you!
Merry Christmas!


Sorry for the inaudible speech! I couldn't understand it.



That song's awesome!!! I think I know what some of the missing lyrics are...
i changed them.
 
here's one of a fred dagg cd i got out of the liberary.
we 3 kings of orient are,
one in a tractor and 2 in a car,
one on a scooter,
tooting his hooter,
following yonder star,
star of glory
star of light,
stars of storys, she'll be right,
star of glory, thats the story,
following yonder star,
by car.
aahhhh, good old fred dagg.
 
"Hi Acman." "Greetings, Infernal Jeff & Guitar Guy."
"So, how's your guitar playing coming?" "I'm pretty good now! Right, Guitar Guy?"
"Ya, I heard you practicing. You sound great. Why don't you guys do a song?"
"Ok. Here we go."
*Music from Jingle Bells starts*
Dashing through the sand, with a bomb strapped to my back,
I have a nasty plan, for Christmas is Iraq.
I go through checkpoint A, but not through checkpoint B,
thats when I got shot in the ass by the US military.
Oh, Jingle Bombs, Jingle Bombs, mine blew up you see,
Where are all the virgins that ben laden promised me?
Eh! Jingle Bombs, Jingle Bombs, you just shot me dead,
The only thing that is left is the towl upon my head.
"Very nice." "Yes, but now we get to the interesting part. Guitar Guy, let's see what you got."
*Guitar Solo*
"Oh man, Guitar Guy's really good." "Not bad, but listen to this."
*Evil Guitar Solo*
"Heh heh heh heh heh! Eat my strings Guitar Guy! Maybe you should practice a little, eh?"
I used to be a man, but every time I cough, Thanks to Uncle Sam, my nuts keep falling off!
My bombing days are done, *Inaudible speech* Perhaps it would be much safer a a * Inaudible word* store nut clerk!
Oh! Jingle Bombs, Jingle Bombs, I think i got screwed,
Don't laugh at me because I will kill you.
Heh Heh Heh Heh heh! I kill you!
Merry Christmas!

Sorry for the inaudible speech! I couldn't understand it.


I knew what the underlined one was.
 
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