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Quite possibly the best example of bad writing.

Flareth said:
Oh gosh, I found the best worst fanfic author ever.

http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1730364/Hans_von_Hozel

Swear this guy has to be some sort of troll.
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My god, those are just terrible and awesome at the same time xD

House

One day, House was walk into his House.

"It is good to have House House!" say House, as he walk into House House.

Suddenly, the door on House House opened and Time Paradox flew out!

"YOU CANNOT HAVE HOUSE INSIDE HOUSE!!!!!" scream Time Paradox, as a paradox many times.

"But is House House!" say House.

"IT IS NO MORE FOR HOUSE HOUSE!!!!!!!!!!" say Time Paradox, as the House disconnects from the floor and flys into Time Paradox.

And no more House House.
"But my House House!!!" say House, as a not House House.

But Time Paradox would not return House House.

"I cannot return House House without a make Paradox!" say Time Paradox.

House was annoy at this, and jumped into the Time Paradox, to get back House House.

"HOUSE HOUSE!" shout House, but there were no House House inside Time Paradox.

"I have turned House House to bricks..." say Time Paradox, and Time Paradox closed and House was stuck inside Time Paradox forever.
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...frighteningly, I almost got what was going on here. Almost.
 
Saith said:
Well I'm pretty sure Twilight should be here, but~
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Can't agree as I haven't read the book, but I HAVE to tell that one at school. One of the teachers is forcing her class to read it. I'm currently stockpiling Elmo books for when the time comes that she may make my class do that. I've told her already that I'd rather read 1000 Elmo books instead, and I mean it. Good news is that I don't have her as a teacher this year, so I have plenty of time to collect them.

Mike the Foxhog said:
...frighteningly, I almost got what was going on here. Almost.
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Even more frighteningly, I think I got what was going on. O_O
 
Eeveelution said:
Even more frighteningly, I think I got what was going on. O_O
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Well by my interpretation, House has entered his much-loved house and by some miscarriage of logic, having House in a house is paradoxical. Therefore the paradox- an abstract concept- comes to life to force him to leave, eventually destroying the house brick by brick to do so.

Or as Mr von Hozel chooses to put it, "House cannot House inside House House!".



Also everything this guy does on Pokémon is frigging hilarious, particularly this and this.

"I am not a strong enough for Pokemon World!" yell Ash, and Ash pull out a Gameshark.

"We shall use a cheatings and make of the stronger!" say Pikachu, as Ash typed the cheats into Gameshark.

Suddenly, Ash had all the Pokemon Badges and his Pokedex was full of all Pokemon!

"This is greatest!" yell Ash, jump up and down.

But suddenly, MissingNo jumped out from the trees.

"I am MissingNo..." say MissingNo, "AND I SHALL MAKE A MISSING FROM YOUR NUMBER!!!!!!!!"

And MissingNo grabbed Ash Gameshark and stamped it to the floor.

"I am borken and cannot make cheatings!" say Gameshark.
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Talking Gameshark. Oh god didn't I just die.
 
Mike the Foxhog said:
Well by my interpretation, House has entered his much-loved house and by some miscarriage of logic, having House in a house is paradoxical. Therefore the paradox- an abstract concept- comes to life to force him to leave, eventually destroying the house brick by brick to do so.

Or as Mr von Hozel chooses to put it, "House cannot House inside House House!".
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Huh, I thought it was some guy named House who went into his house and was attacked by a time paradox. But yours makes sense too.

Mike the Foxhog said:
Talking Gameshark. Oh god didn't I just die.
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Ah but saying Gameshark making more sense saying than Action Replay. (I think that's how he'd say it.)


Anyways, isn't there an award show for super bad movies? We should do one for super bad fan fiction!!
 
I just couldn't read this, all I read was the first few really short sentences (which i already 4get). Then i skipped to the end where he says no flaming and to message for spelling mistakes. My only response...WHAT THE FUCK????? JUST BECAUSE CAPS LOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL DOESNT MEAN IT REALLY IS ESPECIALLY IF YOUR 18!!!!!!!!!
 
Flareth said:
Oh gosh, I found the best worst fanfic author ever.

http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1730364/Hans_von_Hozel

Swear this guy has to be some sort of troll.
Click to expand...

This is amazing. Truly one of the best authors on the internet. Here's another great piece:

The Accidental Virus
Gordon Freeman made a standing inside Science Office.
Many science were littered across the room.
Suddenly, Gordon made discovery of something strange in his Science Readings!
"I THINK YOU SHOULD COME AND MAKE SEE THIS!!!" shout Gordon to the corridor..., but no one replied.
Gordon looked down at the Bacterias on his plate.
Suddenly, the bacteria flew off Plate!
"YOU SHOULD HAVE PUT TOP ON PLATE!" shout Bacteria, "NOW WE INFECT THE WORLD!!!!!!"
The Bacteria began to danube and multiply, and soon the whole room was full Bacteria.
"OH NO!!" screamed Gordon, as he forgot to shut the window curtains and bacteria OUT THE WINDOW!!!!!
The Police had installed a camera into Gordon's Science Lab, and saw this with their film.
Suddenly, the Police jumped into the room.
"You have release VIRUS!" scream Police, and the put a capture on Gordon and send him to jail.
"BUT THE HALF LIFE!!!!" screamed Gordon!, as he made a sending to jail and bacteria disolves the lab.
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"It is good to have House House!" say House, as he walk into House House.

Suddenly, the door on House House opened and Time Paradox flew out!

"YOU CANNOT HAVE HOUSE INSIDE HOUSE!!!!!" scream Time Paradox, as a paradox many times.
Click to expand...

You gotta give the guy credit,he's German.
 
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