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Suicide Game! =D

I begin to eat the croissant, because I am partial to flaky buttery pastries. ^_^ Halfway through, I bite into something imbedded in the croissant. It is a piece of paper, folded up neatly. I read what is written on the paper and discover that I must finish the snowman before it is too late. I can't find the snowman and in my quest to do so, I am locked in a car in the middle of the Arctic tundra and freeze to death overnight.

I drop a frozen 1-liter bottle of Smart Water.
 
I am thirsty, so I decide to wait for the bottle to thaw out. I leave it on a sunny park bench and wait until I drink it. While I am waiting, I realize I am late for a doctor appointment and frantically run across the road without looking, and get hit by a bus.

I drop a Phillips CD-i
 
I find it and bring it home. and when I hook it up and turn it on a mad EVIL face comes up and all of my other systems short out and explode, so I commit suicide...

I drop my broken systems...
 
I'm about to breathe in the sweet awesome air, when that rascal Leonard Stevenson shows up again. He combines the oxygen atoms with one carbon atom, and turns it into carbon monoxide. Thus I breathe it in and die.

I drop my horridly inaccurate chemistry knowledge.
 
This irritates me. So I set out to help you obtain better chemistry knowledge. Unfortunately I can't find you for a while. When I do finally find you, I discover you have taken up Duel Monsters. I think 'Fine. She wants a Duel, she'll have one. Hopefully in the process I can teach her about chemistry as I am a Pokemon Professor and ex-Root ANBU and my mind is far advanced in more ways than you can imagine.' Unfortunately for me you're using an Alchemy Deck and as I'm using my Dragon Deck I can only get out a Red-Eyes Dakness Dragon whose ATK remain the same while your Golden Humonculous and Helios Tris Megistos get stronger and stronger. I'm tired of this and challenge you to a winner-take-all rematch, THIS TIME I'm using my incredibly awesome Custom Deck that can only be beaten with a Chaos Deck. We Duel, you manage to play your cards well and soon get your Golden Humonculous out again shortly followed by first your Helios, the Primordial Sun, Helios Duos Megistos then at last your Helios Tris Megistos. Great, thinks I. Fortunately for me I've managed to get my Deck's two main headliners out in the first couple turns: 12 Devas Vajira-Shin and his buddy 12 Devas Pajira-Shin. I manage to then summon 12 Devas: Nekoro-Shin #13 and replace him through Feline Divinity with Nekoraji. Before long I manage to get 12 Devas: Indra-Shin and 12 Devas: Majira-Shin out, and now you're knackered. Indra-Shin is in Attack mode, so he can redirect one of your attacks at either Majira-Shin or Nekoraji in which all Battle Damage is redirected right back at you, and since you sent Future Event to my Removed From Play pile I keep switching Indra-Shin to Defence during your Battle Phase with its two free activations for your removing it from play before I get Historic Event and Present Effect on the Field in which case I can use it freely all day long. Eventually your Life Points drop down to 0, and unfortunately for us during that second Duel we suddenly found ourselves in the Shadow Realm and you get sent to the stars. Ryubane is therefore FURIOUS with me and, stealing my Custom Deck challenges me to a Duel. Unfortunately that means I'm left with just my Dragon Deck and since only Chaos Decks are capable of standing a chance against my Custom Deck, I inevitably lose when you get Zhuqiao: Sovereign to the South out on your first turn through Zodiac Defiance. As a result I don't stand a ghost of a chance as when I manage to get my only chance of winning, Red-Eyes Darkness Dragon, out, you use Negate Attack to stop my attack, and during your next turn you use Zhuqiao's Special Ability and destroy Red-Eyes Darkness Dragon, absorbing its ATK and DEF Points and thus beat me in one move. As we were Dueling in the Shadow Realm again and my Life Points have dropped to 0, I thus get sent to the stars, which is another way of saying you've basically died, but not quite!

I drop my Duel Disk with my Dragon Deck still in it, thus meaning you now have my two best Decks...

(Beat that for long-winded and completely implausible!!!)
 
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I believe that I can rule the world by writing another long winded and implausible post about my triumphs with these two amazing decks, but die of sleep deprivation in the attempt. That's why this is all you're left with.

I drop the Red-Eyes Darkness Dragon card.
 
I am also known as the "Red-Eyes Darkness Duelist", so seeing as it's mine I naturally go to dive for it but the System Admin from Hellgar Pack Forums, Kira, who is so obsessed with Yami Yugi she married him, sees it and dives for it first. We wind up in a Duel, but she's not really interested in Duelling any more which is a shame cuz I've heard she's REALLY good and I wanna test myself against someone of her calibre since I've only being Duelling for about 3 years. Unfortunately she beats me in 3 turns by summoning Slifer the Sky Dragon, and as the only decent Deck I have left is my Spellcaster Deck and hers is WAAAAAY better than mine, I get creamed, and again, we're still Duelling in the Shadow Realm, so I'm sure you know what happens when your Life Points drop to 0 here by now...

I drop my Spellcaster Deck! (Damn, this is getting out of hand...)
 
I, unable to keep up with the duels due to not being a Yu-Gi-Oh! Dueler, drop the deck in disgust, which lands on a weak section of the dock I happen to be standing on. it snaps one board, which causes the entire dock to buckle and collapse into the ocean thirty feet below, where I am battered by the waves and broken wood.

I drop a ship in a bottle.
 
My brother drags me out for drinking and snooker. I get really, really drunk and come across this bottle with the ship in it. I show it to Geoff and he takes it back to Harrogate with him. Unfortunately for him (and me) his "sister" Bernie doesn't approve and I get it sent to me in the post. As I am completely incapable of getting a hangover I get this and as I remember it clearly I investigate it for several hours. I fall asleep watching it but have a Moby Dick based nightmare. Then the Mokey Mokey decide they are bored and come to see what I'm up to. They then attempt to remove the ship from the bottle but as they are incorporreal they simply pass straight through the bottle. Wondering what they were attempting I pick up the bottle and hold the end up to my eye and peek in. A small part of the mast breaks away and hits my glasses chipping the lens. I have to go to my opticians to get it fixed but I encounter Arylett en route and she is fuming, wondering where Ryubane is and why I'm not only competing but managing to post longer and more elaborate deaths than both of them. She chases me half way around Leeds and, because I have a Leeds United top on I stumble into a pack of Leeds Rhinoes fans who beat me to within an inch of my life. After falling into a coma a Mokey Mokey flies into my ear and somehow causes a brain hemmorhage from which I soon die painfully and slowly. Somehow...

I drop my Leeds United top!
 
The Leeds United top lands on me. Unfortunately, I happen to be in Manchester at the time. I panic and run around like a headless chicken until the Manchester United fans catch up with me and htrow me, and the shirt under a train leaving for Leeds.

I drop a Mars Bar
 
It has the England flag on it for the World Cup. I pick it up, being a tad peckish, and I suddenly somehow through mysterious circumstances (mostly a bet, probably) find myself in Germany surrounded by German Man United fans. So I pull out my Battle Rifle (somehow from thin air) and start shooting away. Unfortunately this attracts the attention of the local armed police who surround me and are armed with kilashnikovs (wynaut?). After a 3 and a half hour siege we finally come to an agreement and I get deported back to Britain where a German Halo sniper is waiting pointing his weapon at the entryway to LeedsBradford International Airport and blows my brains all over da pavement!

I drop my passport! (Ooh, s**t!)
 
I use your passport and pass myself off as you (despite being 18 and female) jetting myself all around the world, then I come to Africa and get lost somewhere, catching some rare contagious disease and get shipped back to England because noone knows I have it. I vector the disease until everyone in England catches the disease and they come back as zombies to eat me D:

I drop a zombie dog
 
It chases me around the other half of Leeds. After several hours chasing me I finally lose it and run into Matt Smith's Doctor. We wind up going through dozens of adventures together in his TARDIS until we meet the Daleks, the Cybermen, The Master and Davros all at once. After he makes several elaborate moves to stop them all I wind up caught in the middle of one Dalek and a dozen Cybermen. Fortunately for me I remember at that point I still have my Pokemon with me and escape. After several sneak and surprise attacks (you know, divide and conquer and all that), I find myself facing both Them Master and Davros. They are so consumed with each other that I jus simply walk away and get out unchallenged. I find the TARDIS but unfortunately The Doctor has amnesia and doesn't remember me. After several hours trying to jog his memory I get tired and walk off while he's talking to himself. Unfortunately we're in the TARDIS and it's in the Time-Space continuum and I fall out and am lost for all eternity in the void...

I drop my body (I doubt very much that there is any air in there...) still clutching The Doctor's new swanky Sonic Screwdriver!
 
You're body lands beside me and the sonic screwdriver hits me on the head dazing me. Once I've recovered, I pick up the screwdriver and run around Leeds waving it about. Suddenly, loads of Dr. Who fans jump on me, wrestling me for the screwdriver until I wriggle free and fall into a man hole

I drop the man hole cover
 
It lands on my foot and I wind up hopping arount like a mad man. Eventually a pretty lady doctor finds me and treats me. She takes me to hospital and after I am discharged I ask her to for a date. It goes well, until my brother learns of this and the stick I get from him is endless until I finally decide I've had enough hit him over the head with a broomstick. Then, after I grab a tiny wooden spoon I proceed to scoop out and eat his brains (omnomnom). When I'm done it turns out that due to his smoking he has a tarry brain, somehow. This tar poisons me and I wind up back in hospital, but the pretty nurse is nowhere to be seen. I become somewhat depressed and decide enough is enough and overdose on painkillers (an unlikely end for Joe McIntyre that'd have been), but it turns out I've suddenly turned allergic to painkillers and suffer an anolatyc shock and die due to my larynx contracting and my new inability to breathe...

I drop a First Aid handbook!
 
I pick it up and look for first aid for athlete's foot, which I acquired about two weeks ago from swim team cross-training. There is nothing, (what a shock) so I am forced to live for several months with an itchy rash that drives me insane, thus making me cut off my feet and I bleed to death.

I drop my feet.
 
I pick them up and throw them at the tele cuz the burk on the Eurovision Song Contest has a broken bow for his fiddle. Unfortunately we're not even in the right country so I decide to go there and beat him over the head with them instead. Unfortunately Nrowegian Airport Security are a tad suspicious about my having a pair of badly cut off feet in my suitcase. Amazingly they don't seem to buy my explanation about my annoyance at the pillock who opened the Eurovision Song Contest. Graham Norton comes home the following day and is miffed about my annoyance and so he gathers half a dozen homosexuals to beat me up. I'm left in a puddle of my own blood and nobody finds my body for three weeks when a man out walking his dog at first mistakes me a homeless bum but does eventually call the police. After his dog has peed on my leg.

I drop a fiddle!
 
I pick it up and sit on a stump and begin to play. Then the devil comes along with a golden fiddle and we have a fiddling duel, my soul on the line for the fiddle. As the devil rosined up his bow it made an evil hiss, and then a band of demons joined and it went a littl something like *SPLAT* *SCREAM* *Ryubane's heart gets ripped out by flaming tentacles*

I drop the golden fiddle.
 
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