Ahahaha, I got this done and then forgot to update the thread. Typical. Well, now my non-existent readers are aware of how long it takes me to post a chapter. x3 This took ages to write, and I was so focused on getting the sudden horror that loads of bad stuff is happening. Forgive me the last part, which was my attempt at being
totally cryptic and not giving too much away.
Chapter Five – A Wounded World
The day stretched on, the brief flickers of sunshine distorted, made into something rare and brief and utterly twisted. The blue sky was a welcome change from the clouds everywhere else, but the shield tinted all the light, so none of it felt...
right. Tala had long since gotten used to it, as had Redrick – they simply didn't look up. Aaron, however, couldn't ignore it, and she found him staring up several times, frowning in thought. “Stop that,” she finally ordered, not pausing in studying a patient's hands. Blisters were beginning to form on the reddened skin, and her heart sank as she realized that she was dealing with frostbite. Aaron gave her another apologetic glance – it appeared he was good at looking pitiable – and drifted closer in case she needed something.
The patient was awake and complaining, but she felt he had a right to, even if he wasn't in mortal danger. “What Pokemon did this?” she asked carefully, and he grimaced.
“I was traveling with a group of friends for safety, you know? We thought if we got to a big city, it would be... safer. But one of them had a Glaceon, and it just snapped and started attacking. Our other Pokemon – they stopped it, but not before we got hit with Icy Wind. When we finally got here, they sent us all to this section for frostbite.” She frowned, and he, seeing an opening, added “And this fucking hurts, you know? Can you stop staring and do something about it? You have a Fire-type right there.”
Tala gritted her teeth. What he was asking was so simple, and if she had proper medical knowledge, she could have done something confidently, knowing she was right. But she – and everyone else – operated in a limited field. The Pokemon Centres held the useful documents, and they had all been destroyed. The trained nurses could pass on their knowledge, but specific, little things didn't matter as much as knowing how to keep someone alive for the next few hours. Berries and Pokemon and the old remedies only helped so much. So she was at a loss here. There was no time for experimenting, because he was still alive and would likely keep his hands – she had to be happy with that. “I can't,” she said slowly, hating the bitter shame in her words.
He stared at her. She knew what disbelieving question would spring to his lips, so she cut it short.
“Look, I don't know if applying heat to the rest of your body will help or hurt you, so I can't use Flare to just melt it, so shut up and sit there while I do what works,” she explained in a rush. “Aaron, get a bowl.” She didn't bother looking up – she could hear him running off. She hadn't dealt with frostbite often, but she knew that the ugly blisters would eventually harden and turn black – but she didn't
think he was in trouble. Really, Aaron could do this.... All it required was patience, which she certainly didn't have. Maybe she shouldn't have been gleeful about having an assistant – she certainly wasn't glad, not when he was so annoying and inexperienced, but she had never been able to delegate before. There was still something about him that bothered her, that sometimes he was too absent, too focused on something else....
It could be just her general annoyance with people who wasted her time. It would be so easy to simply pass it off as that.
“So why can't you just heat up my arms, or whatever?”
She lifted her gaze from her patient's reddened hands and scowled at him. “Because the difference in temperature might fry your nerves. I can't be sure, so it's easier to just do what's always worked.” Not that she had to do this often, but at least she knew what the usual treatment was. “Just be glad we don't have to chop anything off.” He paled, and she tried not to look pleased that she had shut him up. Aaron returned quickly enough with the promised bowl. She set it on the ground and watched as Torrent began to fill it with water, the Feraligatr controlling what usually would have been a blast. That had been one of the hardest things when they were learning – all her Pokemon had to learn control, more than the power they had focused on before.
When the bowl was almost full, the Water-type drew back, giving enough room so that Flare could curl around it. Tala backed up as well, wincing as a wave of heat hit. The Houndoom looked quite fierce, fire roiling around his jaws and muscles tensed. She knew – from considerable experience – that his body constantly radiated heat, but whenever he used a Fire-type move, that heat increased. The water in the bowl hissed, warming up quickly, but only once it began to steam did he let the flames dwindle, a few spurting out to lick at the air. Tala waved a hand through the air over it, winced again and carefully picked it up. It was, expectedly, hot, and she was more than happy to set it down beside the trainer.
“Here. Dip your hands in this. Aaron, you might have to help him. Flare, stay –” A low, troubled whine made her heart twinge, but she fought back the impulse to give in. Damn it, he knew how to make her regret orders. “
Stay. Keep the bowl hot.” And she fled before she could chance a look at him.
Sometimes she doubted if it was wise to keep her Pokemon out all the time. What if the shield failed? And it was difficult, to have an escort this large. Torrent was slow-moving out of water and when not on all fours, and though Shard and Flare could keep pace with her easily, there just wasn't enough room for them, the hulking Water-type and both Sage and Rai. Senica thought she trusted too easily, but she couldn't bear to keep her Pokemon trapped in Pokeballs all the time. And really – though she hadn't ever said this, as Redrick would have found someone for counselling immediately – if she had to die, she would rather have been killed by her Pokemon than the mindless fury of a swarm. Of course, she knew that act would cause them pain, and she didn't want that, but....
“Tala!” That was Senica's voice, harsh with alarm. She didn't even bother asking what was wrong – she just ran.
---
“This seems kind of unneccessary.”
“Does it?”
“I mean, I report directly to you anyways – there's no real point in bothering to –”
“Call it a hunch. Do not worry, I will not remain for long.”
“Really?”
“I merely wish to check something. You will see soon.”
---
She hadn't been sure what she was expecting to see – some sort of massacre, maybe, or a wounded Pokemon that had attacked everything around it – but when she came to a stop beside Senica, there was only one person, a simple human being. Defenseless, without a Pokemon, and hunched over on the ground. “What's wrong?” she demanded. The man wasn't someone she recognized, but Flare began to growl, red eyes fixed on him as he rocked back and forth. “Is he hurt?” Senica flapped a hand at her for silence, glaring daggers, and she shut up, watching the man. He looked like a medic, if anything, and apparently uninjured, but... something about how he held himself, arms wrapped around his knees, made her skin crawl.
He suddenly lifted his head to stare at them, and she took a step back involuntarily. His eye sockets looked bruised, as if he hadn't been sleeping well. That wasn't the unnerving thing, but his eyes seemed to be locked on something behind them. She shrank back, welcoming the solid comfort of Torrent behind her. Senica wasn't as easily scared, and just knelt down. “Hey, Hunter. You remember me and Tala, don't you?” she said gently, words slow and soothing.
He nodded jerkily, still looking past them. Tala relaxed, assuming Senica would know how to deal with whatever problem he had, but his words shattered that illusion.
“You're real, right?”
Senica stared at him, and Tala shivered. There was something so
wrong here. His lips twitched, and his eyes flicked behind them again. “You have to be real. I think you're real, not a dream – not a dreamdreamdream...”
She couldn't help it, backing up even more, hating herself for it. She could take wounds and death but not, not
this. He noticed her movement, fixed his gaxe on her, and said wistfully, “He says sorry, in my dreams. He says sorry, but he does it anyways, so I can't sleep, and perchance to dream – the shadows move, you know, they move and chase me while he apologizes...” Her skin wasn't crawling anymore – she felt cold, shuddering because of his words, his detached tone, the look in his eyes.
“What the – what the
fuck,” she managed to whsiper, her voice trembling. Shitshitshit, she had never thought that their shields were perfect, but Pokemon weren't supposed to go insane inside them – and never humans, but this guy... he terrified her. No, not him, but what she saw in his
eyes, in the exhaustion and fear there.
“Tala! Get a hold of yourself,” Senica snapped, and she shrank back, clinging to Torrent as a lifeline. This was wrong, so so wrong... she wanted to throw up. Retch again and again, try to get rid of the sight of his eyes. There was a sickly sounding sob, and she dimly realized that the man – Hunter, Senica had called him – was laughing or crying, or maybe both, shoulders trembling with the effort. “Come on, he needs help –”
But she was backing away. She couldn't help him, couldn't bring herself to go near. She needed to get away. Ignoring the concern and rage in the other medic's voice, she turned and moved blindly away, falling into a stumbling sort of run. She had no fear of outdistancing her Pokemon – she could see Shard pacing her, paws tapping lightly on the ground. Gradually, she realized he was sheperding her, nudging her to the left or the right, and eventually she ended up in front of a startled Aaron, with her Houndoom beside him and his own Pokemon looming right behind.
“Tala! You – you look... terrible,” he said awkwardly. “What happened?” She stared at him blankly, and then closed her eyes, trying to block everything out. A warm muzzle pushed against her hand as Flare trotted over to her side, and Shard leaned against her leg, both of them doing their best to comfort them. How pathetic, really. She couldn't do this – could never do this. Why couldn't she go back to how it had started out, a girl and a Totodile on a path at night, possibilities all expanding from that one moment? Why?
She hadn't wanted to heal people and cover her hands with their blood, to see them die, to hear them ask for their Pokemon and feel that same claw of fear clench around her heart, a reminder that
her Pokemon could die,
her lifelines could be cut away. She hadn't wanted to be stuck with a partner who noticed too much or a crazy apprentice who bothered her in a way she couldn't pin down.
Back then – if she could just forget all of this and go back – back then, it had been so
simple.
The slow, lumbering footsteps of Torrent – the Feraligatr's gait distinctive because of the dragging sound of his tail – announced that the rest of her party had arrived. Suddenly aware that Aaron was probably still staring at her, she muttered a gruff, “I'm fine,” turning away and scrubbing at the dampness on her cheeks. “It was just – it was nothing. You're done with this... this section?”
He let his breath out in a long sigh. She was suddenly grateful that he seemed so... meek – Redrick would have persisted in asking, but Aaron just accepted it. “Not... not quite. There's one last person I wanted you to take a look at. I... don't know what to do.” The Gallade – she had thought him almost a statue, just standing there quietly – finally moved, eyes flicking to the side and shifting his weight. Maybe he had said something to Aaron, maybe not. Regardless, she was too tired and shaken to bother asking.
“Sure, whatever. Show me.”
The walk was short, but before they had even gotten there she was feeling even more nervy. Shard – one of the most quiet of her party – was growling softly, and he bristled as he paced her. Rai had stopped at one moment and bleated nervously, and Sage's flowers spun ceaselessly on her head, too-rich scent wafting around her at erratic intervals. They knew something was up, something bad, and Tala knew she wasn't prepared to see someone going crazy again.
She wrinkled her nose, filled with relief, as Aaron led her to what was probably a female trainer. Her eyes were closed and she was breathing evenly, but her skin was covered in what looked to be a hundred tiny cuts, each shallow but bleeding. A few bandages had been tied into place, but otherwise, she had been left alone. Strange, but... It probably looked far worse than it was. “Why is that one even here? It looks like she got hit by Razor Leaf or something like that. I hope you don't have problems with bandaging wounds,” she managed to say mockingly, but the words dried up as Aaron solemnly pointed to a patch of bare skin on the girl's shoulder.
As if a tiny knife was gouging the flesh, a new cut opened up, done by nothing that she could see. A second one soon followed, both identical to the others.
Now she had her answer for why her Pokemon had been so uneasy – this was just...
wrong. The same way that medic had looked, now that she thought of it. “What – what is it?” she demanded, clenching her hands into fists so they wouldn't tremble.
A curse, the Gallade suddenly answered.
From a Ghost Pokemon.
“Can you stop it?”
The Psychic-type stepped forward, reaching out one bladed arm and holding it over the girl's head. There was a brief blue glow, and then he stepped back again.
No. The Pokemon who laid it sacrificed its life to ensure the curse would continue. There was something like pity in those eerie, red eyes, but she ignored it. All she heard, all she cared about, was the denial.
“You're giving up,” she hissed, unable to look away. One of the bandages was growing steadily more blood-soaked, the cuts probably deepening over time. This close, she could smell the metallic reek of too much blood, see how it was going to stain and spread until the girl died.
She didn't want this – didn't want to do this, to be forced to do something, but standing there and watching her die was the only other option, and she couldn't,
wouldn't do that. Being a medic was better than watching, wasn't it? It meant she was... a better person, right?
I am not. Was his 'voice' colder than before?
“You fucking are, she's going to
die,” she gritted out, and ignored the muffled sound of protest Aaron made. Before she could move, the Psychic-type stepped away and towards her. He was barely shorter than her, and she couldn't look away from his gaze.
Very well, then. There was something old, wisdom stretching far beyond what she could comprehend.
Save her.
She stared at him – he stared back, silent and unmoving. It wasn't a challenge. “Aaron, more bandages, whatever you have for cleaning, and then stay out of my way,” she said tightly. The Gallade slid past her without another word, and she focused on the girl in front of her, binding every wound, desperate to staunch the bleeding and close the wounds and
fix it.
Why had this happened? What had this random girl, this victim, done to deserve this? She was still sleeping, her look of calm somehow worse than if she had been struggling as every new cut was carved into her skin. And yet she was surely bleeding to death – it wouldn't clot, and every time she paid attention to one, another would open, or five, as if the curse was mocking her. The Gallade had given up. She wouldn't. She wouldn't let her die – she was going to live if Tala had to drag her out of the mouth of hell.
When she closed her eyes, she saw red, and her mouth tasted of blood.
Aaron once tried to tell her something, but she ignored him, blocked out his words. He wasn't important – couldn't he see that she had a duty? That she
had to do this?
Her fingers were covered in blood. She couldn't remember having ever seen so much before. The light was bad, wavering as if it was already dusk – but she didn't look up to check. She couldn't spare any time for distractions, for feeling how tired she was or noticing that her hands were shaking. That all didn't
matter. There was the light sound of footsteps behind her – probably Aaron checking up on her, trying to see if she had given up yet. Her Pokemon weren't near her – that was strange, but maybe they had gone to check on other patients, or to eat or... something. More footsteps, closer.
“Leave me the fuck alone. Can't you see I'm busy?” she snapped.
She is dead.
Her head snapped up and she stared at the Gallade that had stepped out in front of her again. “Get away! You're wrong – you're wrong, you've got to be, she's still breathing, I can still save her...” The words came out in a rush, broken apart with sobs as she struggled to focus on the body in front of her. The
girl, not the body, she was still alive...
Her chest didn't rise or fall under her hands. Tala froze, and then her fingers scrabbled to find a pulse, ignoring the feeling of blood dried and still wet on her hands.
When?
Why hadn't she noticed?
Why? She was a goddamn medic, she was supposed to know, supposed to tell when people died –
You are also sixteen years old, said the voice in her head, soothing and infuriatingly calm.
You were given formal training for a year and then sent out and expected to improvise. You are tired. Excuses – reasons for why she failed, obstacles and stumbling blocks that she couldn't blame her failures on because she could be better than this, save more lives –
His eyes were glowing blue, she noticed vaguely, a strange light that made his form shimmer and ripple like a mirage.
Enough. You cannot save everyone. A pause, and then the voice sounded... more solemn, and she could have imagined regret in his eyes.
You will not save everyone. I am sorry. She knew that – she fucking knew that, had known that all along, but couldn't she save one more person, just
one more when she tried?
Her mouth opened, and she was about to tell him to shut up, to get out of her way, out of her
head, but he stretched out a flickering arm, his eyes blazed with blue fire, and there was a sudden layer of meaning, hidden depths that yawned open for her to sense.
Rest.
---
Muffled voices, like she was hearing them through water. “Holy shit, what happened?”
“There was... a girl. She was cursed. We couldn't do anything, but...”
“Yeah, yeah, I get it. She had to pick now to do this again, didn't she?” There is a slight shift in the world, but she can't force her eyes to open. A low rumble wove itself into the conversation. “Yeah, Torrent, just stand still and I'll just...” Something was under her, sturdy and immovable, and she clung to it. Why was she so... sleepy?
“Er... again?”
“It's nothing – she works too hard, you know? Come on, let's go –” The voices faded, and it was so hard to think...
---
The girl slid off of her Feraligatr's back, hitting the sleeping bag and still not stirring. She doubtless would wake up in the morning, well rested. Maybe not even bothered by the events of the day before – it was easy to believe, looking at her relaxed face. If one were to move through the uneasy peace of the medics' camp, they would see the brows of those meditating on the barrier crease in confusion. They would see medics and Pokemon gripped in nightmares, unable to wake up. They would see a Gallade, standing silent watch over the barrier – except when the light of the wavering shield flared, and for a moment, the Gallade was not.
They would see something like a phantom – no, two, curves reflected only when they passed through the light - slip through the shield, ghost through the camp on unseen, still wings. They would see Pokemon turn their heads, awaken and watch them pass. They would see the ghosts hover over some tents, as if in benediction, and pass through others unnoticed by the human occupants.
And through it all, many eyes watched them go.