In Progress Forgotten History

[Dar]

(Please note that this will probably be terrible, considering that I haven't written in a long time.)

Chapter 1:
Fresh Start​

A prison guard was pushing Malcom back into his cell. Same routine as usual. But, despite of this, Malcom was just an average guy. Or at least, he used to be. He had mildly long black hair, that was usually pretty rough-looking. Malcom had abnormally violet eyes, which looked blue in light. Between that and his prison jumpsuit, he looked pretty strange.

But that wasn't what made him abnormal. Ten years earlier, Malcom was just a repair man for the city, who'd just met the love of his life. However, it didn't last long. It happened shortly after his marriage. Mary, the most wonderful woman in the world to him, had been murdered. The murderer had been sent to jail for many years, but that hadn't been enough for Malcom. He wanted him to pay.

Malcom paid the bail for the murderer, just so he could kill him himself. Because of this, he had been sent to jail for many years, ironically, in the same cell as the previous killer. But he didn't care. He got what he wanted.

Several hours later, Malcom went on, finishing his breakfast (He didn't get much food. He had to save it.) when the same guard from earlier appeared at his cell door. The guard unlocked it and said, "C'mon. You've been bailed out." Malcom looks at him and says, "By who?"
"Look, do you want out or not?"
Malcom nodded, and then the guard escorted him to the main entrance, where a man wearing all black was waiting. After the guard left, the man said, "You Malcom Knight?" Malcom then replied, "Um, yeah. Who are you?" The man then said, "You'll find out soon enough. Now come with me. We have alot to discuss."

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I'm hoping to have Chapter 2 ready soon! :D

 

[DarkAura]

This actually seems really interesting. But the part that says "Don't get me wrong" is talking in first person, while the rest of the story is third person limited. Might want to change that so it's also third person.

It's also a little short for a chapter. Might I suggest making it larger?

I actually am interested in this, and I really would like to see another chapter. :)

 

[Dar]

This actually seems really interesting. But the part that says "Don't get me wrong" is talking in first person, while the rest of the story is third person limited. Might want to change that so it's also third person.

It's also a little short for a chapter. Might I suggest making it larger?

I actually am interested in this, and I really would like to see another chapter. :)

Thanks for the advice. I'll try to make the next chapter longer.