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  • I will transcend my human existence and become an all-powerful Man-Bear
    Maybe two bears share one big plate of food, one working the fork and the other working the knife and they alternate forkfuls
    Then I will go out into the wild and teach it to the bears. Perhaps in centuries to come I will be heralded as a god in their society.
    Of course they have
    I'm almost tempted to get back into conlanging so I can create the language of the bears. Almost.
    Why would they have their feet up on the table, they are gentlemen
    Plus I don't think their digits are all that manipulable so they probably can't make many simple handshapes either
    Yeah but even then they need something to spear the food with and hold it in place so it isn't just pushed around by the cutting motion
    Actually sign languages are made up without the use of pre-existing written or spoken language all the time
    Then how would they hold a knife
    Or maybe Bear Sign Language
    I dunno, attaching straps to forks without thumbs sounds like fiddly work
    I've been surprisingly good! Last we talked was... 2012? Since then I've gone off to Boston for college and am currently midway through the second semester of freshman year. What've you been up to?
    Roaring lacks a complex enough phonological and grammatical structure to facilitate the full nuance of intelligent discourse
    They will develop thumb-free Bear Forks
    Though to do that they need to develop language
    In retrospect there are a lot more barriers to bear civilisation than we anticipated when we first decided this was a thing we should be concerned about
    Also the dinner parties can be used to discuss military strategy to take down their human oppressors
    Because obviously the first step in establishing a society is developing table manners
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