Meririn
You are now imagining the RBY Elite 4 theme.
On Thursday, the 19th of February, my boyfriend and I will have been going out for two years.
Now, it hasn't been an easy ride... Aw, who am I kidding, being with him is as natural as breathing. We met in a computers class three years ago. I remember the very first time I ever saw him. You know how in movies, time slows down when the pretty girl walks by? That happened to me. All I could think was, "Wow, he is the hottest guy I have ever seen. I am going to seduce him starting now."
But we didn't get together immediately. I was younger and a lot stupider then, and someone who was part of my extended clique decided to try to make the moves on me. I didn't like him, but he thought he loved me, so I figured I'd date him for a week so he could realize his folly and I could get back to chasing my favourite nerd. Well, it didn't work out that way. As time passed and I came to like my boyfriend of the time less and less, I thought I needed to stay with him, because if I couldn't love him, I didn't think anyone could. Meanwhile, I began to be friends with my real crush. We talked all night on MSN. One night, at three in the morning, he said, "It feels like we're twins, we have so much in common." I knew in that moment that I was in love.
And yet I didn't think he could ever feel for me as more than a friend, and I stayed in my unhappy relationship with someone I'll henceforth refer to as M. Six months in, M began casually making comments along the lines of him preferring skinny girls. At my then-weight of 120 pounds, I shouldn't have felt as insecure as I did, but as I said, I was young and stupid. He would dig into me about me not being outwardly emotional. I didn't know what it was then, but I began to become severely depressed. I lost all my drive and hardly ate. He would tell me he was disappointed by me if I wasn't at his beckon call and if I didn't make every effort to see him every day, which, since there were no buses and I had no bicycle, meant I walked for a good two hours one way to see him. As time continued passing, he cut more and more of my self-esteem out from under me, causing me to lose the necessary mental reserve to leave him. Most of what he derided me for was my stauch refusal to put out, which was one of the terms I had set before the relationship even started. He tried to pin me down once, but I kicked him in the stomach. Meanwhile, the boy from computers was my best friend. Him, my boyfriend and I formed a sort of inseperable trio. We had a function we called movie night which happened every Friday. I looked forward to that all week.
Nine months into the relationship with M, I found out my family was moving three hours south. I was absolutely devastated. My friends threw me a going away party, and of course, my best friend came. When I had to go home, he hugged me in front of everyone. I was touched. I also discovered that my lust for him hadn't died at all. Sorry, M.
Once I had moved, the relationship with M deteriorated at an exponential rate. If I so much as spoke up against him, he would 'break up' with me for a day or two before saying he would take me back, but only because he felt sorry for me. Our relationship had begun in January - by December of the same year, I'd lost 30 pounds entirely because I felt unworthy of wasting food on myself. I couldn't sleep, so again, I stayed up all night with my demons. However, I wasn't alone. My best friend, the man I loved, braved the dark with me, listening to my misery, offering his shoulder.
But, as the title of the thread implies, I did find strength hidden inside myself. One day, my computer class amore began an MSN conversation with a statement unusual for our talks. "I've met someone."
I cannot describe to you how far down my chest my heart seemed to drop. 'I waited too long. He's found a girl,' I thought.
"His name is James. He seems pretty cool. I think we're friends," he continued.
And right at that second I knew that it was over with M. We got into another fight not too long afterwards. I'd (foolishly) told him how depressed I was, and he told me that if I killed myself, he'd dig my body up and throw it in the woods because people like me don't deserve to be buried on consecrated ground. I told this to a female friend I had, and she said, "Oh geez, you're still dating him? I thought you'd broken up, otherwise I wouldn't have had sex with him." It later came out that he'd cheated with both of my female friends. I broke up with him on the spot.
And, of course, being the damsel in distress I was (more like a freed she-demon; once I left him, I felt extremely vindicated and powerful), I needed some consoling from my friends. So who better to invite to see me the next weekend than my best friend? Mua ha ha ha ha. Lilith is back in town.
I wore my best clothes the day he came. I even Windexed my laptop screen so it would look good for his arrival. We had two and a half days together. The first day, we stayed up until five in the morning, both of us too shy to say much, glancing at each other and then looking away. Finally, when we were hardly awake enough to form coherent sentences, he leaned over and kissed me. And that was that. He was too shy to formally ask me out, so on February the 19th, I took matters into my own hands. I never thought I could love someone as deeply and truly as I love him. We're so alike that we hardly ever argue, and when we do argue, we don't stay mad. It's been a long road, but it's been a wonderful journey. Some highlights of our relationship:
-Getting caught naked by his mom. Whoops.
-Getting chased out of his house by his mom and hiding in an elementary school.
-Him trying to comfort me while I was sick by curling up beside me under a blanket on the floor and promply falling asleep.
-Us sharing a bed for the first time (it was half a couch and we were at a party with no way home).
-Him waking me up in the middle of the night to hold my hand when I crashed on his loveseat at his birthday party.
-Him surprising me by coming down for my birthday.
-Sending him a box with a chocolate heart box in it, stuffed with hearts with all of our precious moments written on them.
-The first time we ever cried in each others' arms.
-Dressing up in an old-school German maiden dress and striped tights for him. What? It can't all be wholesome.
-Him buying me an unopened Nintendo of Japan soundtrack to The Legend Of Zelda: Ocarina of Time for Christmas.
-Trading our most prized possessions as a sign of love.
This is barely anything. Every day is wonderful. We've gone four months without seeing each other before, and we've been long distance for our entire relationship, but neither of us has ever shirked from it as being too hard or entertained notions of cheating. After the torture I went through with my first boyfriend, I feel honoured to be blessed with the happiness I feel with my second one. Most people would say I'm too young to really mean it when I talk about being with him long-term, but I think that if he gained 200pounds and went bald early, I would still feel priveledged to love him. It's been two years of adventure, and I can't wait to see what life has waiting for us. If you ever read this, mein Schatz, then let me say thank you for two years of reading my crappy writing, thank you for being as worried as I was when I had to get surgery, thank you for not dumping my crazy ass, thank you for picking me up when I couldn't stand and carrying me wordlessly until I could walk again. And to those of you who are lonely, don't give up hope, because the skinny nerd in glasses, the nice guy, sometimes he finishes first.
Now, it hasn't been an easy ride... Aw, who am I kidding, being with him is as natural as breathing. We met in a computers class three years ago. I remember the very first time I ever saw him. You know how in movies, time slows down when the pretty girl walks by? That happened to me. All I could think was, "Wow, he is the hottest guy I have ever seen. I am going to seduce him starting now."
But we didn't get together immediately. I was younger and a lot stupider then, and someone who was part of my extended clique decided to try to make the moves on me. I didn't like him, but he thought he loved me, so I figured I'd date him for a week so he could realize his folly and I could get back to chasing my favourite nerd. Well, it didn't work out that way. As time passed and I came to like my boyfriend of the time less and less, I thought I needed to stay with him, because if I couldn't love him, I didn't think anyone could. Meanwhile, I began to be friends with my real crush. We talked all night on MSN. One night, at three in the morning, he said, "It feels like we're twins, we have so much in common." I knew in that moment that I was in love.
And yet I didn't think he could ever feel for me as more than a friend, and I stayed in my unhappy relationship with someone I'll henceforth refer to as M. Six months in, M began casually making comments along the lines of him preferring skinny girls. At my then-weight of 120 pounds, I shouldn't have felt as insecure as I did, but as I said, I was young and stupid. He would dig into me about me not being outwardly emotional. I didn't know what it was then, but I began to become severely depressed. I lost all my drive and hardly ate. He would tell me he was disappointed by me if I wasn't at his beckon call and if I didn't make every effort to see him every day, which, since there were no buses and I had no bicycle, meant I walked for a good two hours one way to see him. As time continued passing, he cut more and more of my self-esteem out from under me, causing me to lose the necessary mental reserve to leave him. Most of what he derided me for was my stauch refusal to put out, which was one of the terms I had set before the relationship even started. He tried to pin me down once, but I kicked him in the stomach. Meanwhile, the boy from computers was my best friend. Him, my boyfriend and I formed a sort of inseperable trio. We had a function we called movie night which happened every Friday. I looked forward to that all week.
Nine months into the relationship with M, I found out my family was moving three hours south. I was absolutely devastated. My friends threw me a going away party, and of course, my best friend came. When I had to go home, he hugged me in front of everyone. I was touched. I also discovered that my lust for him hadn't died at all. Sorry, M.
Once I had moved, the relationship with M deteriorated at an exponential rate. If I so much as spoke up against him, he would 'break up' with me for a day or two before saying he would take me back, but only because he felt sorry for me. Our relationship had begun in January - by December of the same year, I'd lost 30 pounds entirely because I felt unworthy of wasting food on myself. I couldn't sleep, so again, I stayed up all night with my demons. However, I wasn't alone. My best friend, the man I loved, braved the dark with me, listening to my misery, offering his shoulder.
But, as the title of the thread implies, I did find strength hidden inside myself. One day, my computer class amore began an MSN conversation with a statement unusual for our talks. "I've met someone."
I cannot describe to you how far down my chest my heart seemed to drop. 'I waited too long. He's found a girl,' I thought.
"His name is James. He seems pretty cool. I think we're friends," he continued.
And right at that second I knew that it was over with M. We got into another fight not too long afterwards. I'd (foolishly) told him how depressed I was, and he told me that if I killed myself, he'd dig my body up and throw it in the woods because people like me don't deserve to be buried on consecrated ground. I told this to a female friend I had, and she said, "Oh geez, you're still dating him? I thought you'd broken up, otherwise I wouldn't have had sex with him." It later came out that he'd cheated with both of my female friends. I broke up with him on the spot.
And, of course, being the damsel in distress I was (more like a freed she-demon; once I left him, I felt extremely vindicated and powerful), I needed some consoling from my friends. So who better to invite to see me the next weekend than my best friend? Mua ha ha ha ha. Lilith is back in town.
I wore my best clothes the day he came. I even Windexed my laptop screen so it would look good for his arrival. We had two and a half days together. The first day, we stayed up until five in the morning, both of us too shy to say much, glancing at each other and then looking away. Finally, when we were hardly awake enough to form coherent sentences, he leaned over and kissed me. And that was that. He was too shy to formally ask me out, so on February the 19th, I took matters into my own hands. I never thought I could love someone as deeply and truly as I love him. We're so alike that we hardly ever argue, and when we do argue, we don't stay mad. It's been a long road, but it's been a wonderful journey. Some highlights of our relationship:
-Getting caught naked by his mom. Whoops.
-Getting chased out of his house by his mom and hiding in an elementary school.
-Him trying to comfort me while I was sick by curling up beside me under a blanket on the floor and promply falling asleep.
-Us sharing a bed for the first time (it was half a couch and we were at a party with no way home).
-Him waking me up in the middle of the night to hold my hand when I crashed on his loveseat at his birthday party.
-Him surprising me by coming down for my birthday.
-Sending him a box with a chocolate heart box in it, stuffed with hearts with all of our precious moments written on them.
-The first time we ever cried in each others' arms.
-Dressing up in an old-school German maiden dress and striped tights for him. What? It can't all be wholesome.
-Him buying me an unopened Nintendo of Japan soundtrack to The Legend Of Zelda: Ocarina of Time for Christmas.
-Trading our most prized possessions as a sign of love.
This is barely anything. Every day is wonderful. We've gone four months without seeing each other before, and we've been long distance for our entire relationship, but neither of us has ever shirked from it as being too hard or entertained notions of cheating. After the torture I went through with my first boyfriend, I feel honoured to be blessed with the happiness I feel with my second one. Most people would say I'm too young to really mean it when I talk about being with him long-term, but I think that if he gained 200pounds and went bald early, I would still feel priveledged to love him. It's been two years of adventure, and I can't wait to see what life has waiting for us. If you ever read this, mein Schatz, then let me say thank you for two years of reading my crappy writing, thank you for being as worried as I was when I had to get surgery, thank you for not dumping my crazy ass, thank you for picking me up when I couldn't stand and carrying me wordlessly until I could walk again. And to those of you who are lonely, don't give up hope, because the skinny nerd in glasses, the nice guy, sometimes he finishes first.
