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Crazy Linoone vs. Bobino

Alright, an interesting first round. Good job kicking my butt back there.

Let's go with Psytallica, the Bronzor.

Ok, Psytallica, we're going to make this first round pretty simple. Try to gain some retribution for Majin and the Psychics landed on him by blasting Riley with a few Psychics.

Psychic ~ Psychic ~ Psychic
 
Ffffff Fine, do it your way. We'll be evil too.

The strategy for this round is simple -- dig down and Swords Dance while laughing evilly at the Bronzor.

Survival is of the utmost importance right now, so we'll have to throw knives later.

Dig (down) ~ Swords Dance ~ Swords Dance
 
2vs2 single
Style: Switch
DQ: Standard week
Damage Cap: 99%
Banned Moves: OHKO's
Arena: Kitchen of Madness

It's actually not a food item this time.

The Kitchen of Madness actually isn't that insane -- it's a rectangular room, slightly larger than the size of a normal arena. There are two cooking counters on each side of the arena, and each counter belongs to one of the trainers. Like regular kitchen counters, there's two sinks, large drawers filled with silverware, stacks of plates, bowls... You name it. There are also several knives sitting in a knifeholder on the each counter, as well as some cutting boards. There is a fridge to the left of each counter, and one can pretty much find any food imaginable inside the fridge. To the right of the counter is a oven and a gas-powered stove top, a perfect place to bake some pies or blow up some propane tanks. A few pots and pans are on the stove top as well as in the drawer underneath the oven.

On request, half of the arena can be sunk down and flooded with water to allow water-only pokemon to battle.

This all sounds like a perfectly normal kitchen until one realizes that every single item in the kitchen can be used as weapons. The knives, spoons, plates, flying pans... Yes, even the frozen turkey in the freezer can be thrown at the enemy. After a bit of testing in a test arena, Linoone has made a chart showing the average damage different types of items do on impact (and they do quite a lot of damage indeed...)

Porcelain and glass (such as plates and, well, glasses): 3% on impact, 1% if shards are stepped on.
Small objects (like spoons and spice bottles): 5%
Sharp pointy things (such as knives, forks, and frozen swordfish heads): 10% if hit by the sharp edge (30% chance), 4% otherwise.
Large, heavy things (like frying pans and frozen turkeys): 12%, but only have 90% accuracy.
The referee: Instant disqualification.

The objects generally take 3% energy to throw, but small objects take only 2% and large, heavy things cost 5%. Thrown objects are considered to have 100% accuracy besides large, heavy things, which only have 90%.

The crazy projectiles don't stop there. You can heat up items on the stove and throw them for a chance of burning your opponent, lob ice cubes at them and hope they catch a cold, force feed them rotten eggs and make them get food poisoning... The possibilities are endless.

Ok, fine, so thrown items aren't that insane. So why is this place called the Kitchen of Madness? The true reason is that the referee will get so tired of rolling the dice that he/she/it will go mad. Yup. That's the reason. Oh, and the little flying pieces of porcelain, but I'm sure that's easily gotten rid of.

Other: Wailords are (for once) allowed.

After a spectacular double knockout with dozens of pretty streamers of light, both battlers withdrew their Pokemon and had a brief conversation about the three previous rounds. Crazy Linoone said something about Destiny Bond, and at that Kwak’waka’s Pokeball gave an agitated shake. Muttering something, the Linoone stuffed the quivering sphere in its beret and pulled out another one. This orb split open to reveal a bipedal black and blue canine who hopped from foot to foot as if he was standing on a hot stove. Upon smelling the delicious smells of the kitchen – particularly the ramen Crazy Linoone had just pulled out of its backpack – Riley the Riolu let a dribble of saliva escape from the corner of his mouth.

The next Pokemon to enter the field was understandably less taken with the arena. Psytallica the Bronzor just stood there, balanced on a single steel ball, and blinked once. It remained completely still until its trainer had given it its commands, and even then it only blinked once more in confirmation.

Round Four

Crazy Linoone (xO)

Riolu
Riley (F) <Steadfast>
Health: 100%
Energy: 100%
Status: Eager to fight, if only for that ramen.
Commands: Dig (down) ~ Swords Dance ~ Swords Dance

Bobino (xO)

Bronzor
Psytallica (N/A) <Heatproof>
Health: 100%
Energy: 100%
Status: Eerily confident.
Commands: Psychic ~ Psychic ~ Psychic

While Psytallica blinked and blinked again as it expanded the reach of its psychic abilities, Riley struck savagely at a floor tile to split it apart and reveal the hard stone underneath. He grimaced; it would be hard to dig through. Nevertheless, he was valiant, and the going was made easier when the stone gave way to clay two or three feet down. When the bipedal canine was sure he was beyond the range of anything Psytallica could throw at him, Riley scooped away some clay with his paws to form a small underground chamber that he could move around in – though he had to duck to avoid hitting his head on the ceiling. Satisfied with his work, the Riolu sat cross-legged on the earth to regain his breath.

Apparently, though, the tunnel wasn’t deep enough, because after several seconds Riley felt a sharp pain in his temples. This was followed by a full-out psychic assault; up on the surface, Psytallica’s eyes were closed in concentration as it sent pointed psychic pulses at various parts of Riley’s brain. The canine screeched in pain and clutched at his head – he looked like he was on the verge of ripping out his short fur – and even the fact that it hurt less than he was expecting it to provided little comfort. Fortunately, Psytallica couldn’t sustain the attack for long, and the agony slowly faded away to be replaced by a dull headache.

Still wincing slightly, though it was mostly covered up by the magnificent scowl that had worked its way across his face, Riley stood up and began to trace slow figure eights with one foot. He spread his arms wide and then abruptly leapt into an active dance, soft paw pads pounding out a rhythm as forepaws swiftly blocked and retaliated against an invisible enemy. All throughout this, the Riolu’s eyes remained closed in deep concentration. Adrenaline pumped through his veins along with the desire to excel in any fight or clash, and confidence poured into his body. Remembering his trainer’s commands, Riley let a torrent of laughter bubble from his throat. The chuckles quickly morphed into something that bordered on ‘evil overlord’ laughter, and the sound of the Riolu’s mirth drifted up to escape from the mouth of his tunnel. The referee blinked.

As soon as the Swords Dance winded down, Riley felt another painful tingle in his skull. He only had time to groan in exasperation before the pain started again, setting his cranium aflame and forcing him to grind his teeth together to stop himself from screaming. Emotionless as his opponent was, Riley was determined not to give Psytallica the satisfaction of hearing him wail like a baby. Like before, it wasn’t long until the Bronzor’s focus ran out, but to Riley it felt like hours.

Despite having a full-out migraine, the Riolu managed to stumble to his feet without pitching over on his side. Even more amazing was the fact he was still able of graceful, coordinated movements. Yet again Riley slid, twisted, and turned in his little underground chamber, flexing his muscles and filling his mind with the conviction that he could win. This time, he settled with a simpler variation of his dance, afraid that he’d stumble and bump his head on the roof of his hollow, or trip over his own paws. Even so, it had the same effect: by the time Riley sat down again, he was bursting with vigour. His headache, though now not as severe, still plagued him, so he decided to skip the ‘insane laughter’ part of his commands. He’d already done it once, anyway.

Another stinging pulse at Riley’s temples signaled a third psychic invasion. This time he knew what to expect and braced himself. It still hurt, though – if anything, it hurt even more than before – and his skull felt like it was going to split open by the time Psytallica’s concentration slipped. Riley was left curled up in the fetal position, panting, his mind clouded with pain.

Crazy Linoone (xO)

Riolu
Riley (F) <Steadfast>
Health: 60%
Energy: 85%
Status: Hurting. A lot. +4 Attack, -1 Sp. Def.

Bobino (xO)

Bronzor
Psytallica (N/A) <Heatproof>
Health: 100%
Energy: 79%
Status: Still eerily confident.

Terrain notes
Nothing to note.

Final notes
Crazy Linoone attacks first next round.
I had Riley’s Dig take a bit more energy than normal because I figured no-one in their right mind would build a kitchen on top of plain earth/clay/what have you.
Psytallica’s Psychics took a bit more energy as well due to the distance. On top of that, damage was slightly reduced.
The second Psychic lowered Riley’s special defense.
Damnit I was looking forward to writing evil laughter, but I forgot about it during the second Swords Dance and I couldn’t find anywhere to plug it in.
 
Pfffff Riley it's time for retaliation! Dig up with your awesomely high attack and kill that metal plate thing because it can't levitate. Follow with some Earthquakes BECAUSE WE CAN. If you're suddenly asleep for whatever reason, Sleep Talk.

Dig (up)/Sleep Talk ~ Earthquake/Sleep Talk ~ Earthquake/Sleep Talk
 
Ok Psytallica, that Dig is nasty, so Protect yourself from it. He's going to be shaking everything around you after that, which is going to suck, but maybe we can mess with his head a bit. Use Confuse Ray and follow it up with another Psychic. You got this.

Protect ~ Confuse Ray ~ Psychic
 
2vs2 single
Style: Switch
DQ: Standard week
Damage Cap: 99%
Banned Moves: OHKO's
Arena: Kitchen of Madness

It's actually not a food item this time.

The Kitchen of Madness actually isn't that insane -- it's a rectangular room, slightly larger than the size of a normal arena. There are two cooking counters on each side of the arena, and each counter belongs to one of the trainers. Like regular kitchen counters, there's two sinks, large drawers filled with silverware, stacks of plates, bowls... You name it. There are also several knives sitting in a knifeholder on the each counter, as well as some cutting boards. There is a fridge to the left of each counter, and one can pretty much find any food imaginable inside the fridge. To the right of the counter is a oven and a gas-powered stove top, a perfect place to bake some pies or blow up some propane tanks. A few pots and pans are on the stove top as well as in the drawer underneath the oven.

On request, half of the arena can be sunk down and flooded with water to allow water-only pokemon to battle.

This all sounds like a perfectly normal kitchen until one realizes that every single item in the kitchen can be used as weapons. The knives, spoons, plates, flying pans... Yes, even the frozen turkey in the freezer can be thrown at the enemy. After a bit of testing in a test arena, Linoone has made a chart showing the average damage different types of items do on impact (and they do quite a lot of damage indeed...)

Porcelain and glass (such as plates and, well, glasses): 3% on impact, 1% if shards are stepped on.
Small objects (like spoons and spice bottles): 5%
Sharp pointy things (such as knives, forks, and frozen swordfish heads): 10% if hit by the sharp edge (30% chance), 4% otherwise.
Large, heavy things (like frying pans and frozen turkeys): 12%, but only have 90% accuracy.
The referee: Instant disqualification.

The objects generally take 3% energy to throw, but small objects take only 2% and large, heavy things cost 5%. Thrown objects are considered to have 100% accuracy besides large, heavy things, which only have 90%.

The crazy projectiles don't stop there. You can heat up items on the stove and throw them for a chance of burning your opponent, lob ice cubes at them and hope they catch a cold, force feed them rotten eggs and make them get food poisoning... The possibilities are endless.

Ok, fine, so thrown items aren't that insane. So why is this place called the Kitchen of Madness? The true reason is that the referee will get so tired of rolling the dice that he/she/it will go mad. Yup. That's the reason. Oh, and the little flying pieces of porcelain, but I'm sure that's easily gotten rid of.

Other: Wailords are (for once) allowed.

Round Five

Crazy Linoone (xO)

Riolu
Riley (F) <Steadfast>
Health: 60%
Energy: 85%
Status: Hurting. A lot. +4 Attack, -1 Sp. Def.
Commands: Dig/Sleep Talk ~ Earthquake/Sleep Talk ~ Earthquake/Sleep Talk

Bobino (xO)

Bronzor
Psytallica (N/A) <Heatproof>
Health: 100%
Energy: 79%
Status: Still eerily confident.
Commands: Protect ~ Confuse Ray ~ Psychic

Psytallica blinked in confusion – what was there to protect against when its opponent was underground? Nevertheless, it stayed stationary and its eyes seemed to glow slightly as a translucent dome formed around it, the shield tinged a pale green.

The Bronzor didn’t have long to wait. Riley had already pricked his ears up to catch the telltale movements of his opponent; once he had pinpointed Psytallica’s location he began scooping dirt aside in a frenzy, making a beeline for the eerie metal disk. With a roar he struck – not at metal, but a barrier made of pure energy. Riley whimpered, cradling his sore paw against his chest, and glared resentfully at the area he was sure Psytallica was. On the surface, the Bronzor had felt the vibration that meant its opponent’s attack had successfully been blocked, and let the Protect fade away. A few moments later, about a foot from where Psytallica was, the tiling suddenly shattered as Riley tunneled his way back to the kitchen.

As soon as Psytallica’s shield disappeared, Riley’s face twisted into a delighted grin. It was time for revenge. He crouched down and punched the tiling in front of him with strong forepaws, causing the tile to shatter and the ground to shake. The tremors increased, sending spidery cracks all along the lip of the two holes and knocking bottles of seasoning and sauce to the ground where they shattered and spilled their contents on the floor. Psytallica wasn’t faring all that much better than the bottles; it had been knocked off balance and was now on its back, knocking against the ground repeatedly as he was tossed and thrown about. A metallic ringing filled its hearing sensors.

After what seemed like a long, long time, the shaking died down and Riley sat back, panting slightly. Psytallica seized the moment to send him several multicoloured psychic pulses, which took the form of will-o-the-wisps that encircled the bipedal canine’s head. He swiped irritably at them, hoping to chase them away, but to no avail – they were stubborn and simply floated back when Riley pushed them away.

The Riolu grumbled and started to use both paws to flail at them wildly. If Psytallica could laugh, it would’ve, but it merely watched the spectacle with an amused glint in its eyes. Screaming in frustration, Riley redoubled his efforts, and at that precise moment his own paw caught him in the side of his head. He cried out, this time in surprise.

Apparently Psytallica had tired of watching Riley swipe at rainbow lights, because its eyes flashed again, this time a pale pink. Its opponent was briefly enveloped in the same colour as his mind was invaded, and then he was screeching, clutching at his head as Psytallica ravaged his brain with cold purpose. Riley emerged from the attack with a renewed headache, and if there was a bright side to the mass amounts of agony the Riolu had been subjected to, it was that it managed to take his mind off of the Confuse Ray. Without any attention to fuel it, the lights sputtered and faded away.

Crazy Linoone (xO)

Riolu
Riley (F) <Steadfast>
Health: 41%
Energy: 68%
Status: Head feels like it’s going to explode. +4 Attack, -1 Sp. Def.

Bobino (xO)

Bronzor
Psytallica (N/A) <Heatproof>
Health: 81%
Energy: 62%
Status: Aching after the Earthquake, but in much better condition than its opponent.

Terrain notes
There are two holes in the kitchen floor, and their rims are cracked – basically, the tunnels are liable to cave in. The hole farther away from Psytallica and Riley leads straight down and widens into a small underground chamber. That chamber then slopes up into another tunnel which abruptly becomes level close to the surface and emerges about a foot away from Psytallica.
Glass now litters the arena close to the counters where bottles have dropped, and various seasoning and awesomesauces accompany the glass.

Final notes
Bobino attacks first next round.
Riley’s Dig took slightly more energy due to, again, rock stuff below the tiles.
Confuse Ray rolled a 99. Aw, one point away from a miss. However, I made it start at moderate instead of severe.
Riley attacked himself in confusion on the 3rd action.
I gave Riley a very small chance of snapping out of confusion due to the intense pain from Psychic, and well, he rolled a 2. Lucky.
 
Good Job Psytallica. You're doing good. Now, I think our best best here is to keep to the same plan, and pound him with Psychics. Can't get much more simple.

Psychic ~ Psychic ~ Psychic
 
:\ I knew I should have spammed earthquake when I had the chance, but too late now...

Spam Earthquake, then Endure on the last action so we can last another round. Go Riley go~

Earthquake ~ Earthquake ~ Endure
 
2vs2 single
Style: Switch
DQ: Standard week
Damage Cap: 99%
Banned Moves: OHKO's
Arena: Kitchen of Madness

It's actually not a food item this time.

The Kitchen of Madness actually isn't that insane -- it's a rectangular room, slightly larger than the size of a normal arena. There are two cooking counters on each side of the arena, and each counter belongs to one of the trainers. Like regular kitchen counters, there's two sinks, large drawers filled with silverware, stacks of plates, bowls... You name it. There are also several knives sitting in a knifeholder on the each counter, as well as some cutting boards. There is a fridge to the left of each counter, and one can pretty much find any food imaginable inside the fridge. To the right of the counter is a oven and a gas-powered stove top, a perfect place to bake some pies or blow up some propane tanks. A few pots and pans are on the stove top as well as in the drawer underneath the oven.

On request, half of the arena can be sunk down and flooded with water to allow water-only pokemon to battle.

This all sounds like a perfectly normal kitchen until one realizes that every single item in the kitchen can be used as weapons. The knives, spoons, plates, flying pans... Yes, even the frozen turkey in the freezer can be thrown at the enemy. After a bit of testing in a test arena, Linoone has made a chart showing the average damage different types of items do on impact (and they do quite a lot of damage indeed...)

Porcelain and glass (such as plates and, well, glasses): 3% on impact, 1% if shards are stepped on.
Small objects (like spoons and spice bottles): 5%
Sharp pointy things (such as knives, forks, and frozen swordfish heads): 10% if hit by the sharp edge (30% chance), 4% otherwise.
Large, heavy things (like frying pans and frozen turkeys): 12%, but only have 90% accuracy.
The referee: Instant disqualification.

The objects generally take 3% energy to throw, but small objects take only 2% and large, heavy things cost 5%. Thrown objects are considered to have 100% accuracy besides large, heavy things, which only have 90%.

The crazy projectiles don't stop there. You can heat up items on the stove and throw them for a chance of burning your opponent, lob ice cubes at them and hope they catch a cold, force feed them rotten eggs and make them get food poisoning... The possibilities are endless.

Ok, fine, so thrown items aren't that insane. So why is this place called the Kitchen of Madness? The true reason is that the referee will get so tired of rolling the dice that he/she/it will go mad. Yup. That's the reason. Oh, and the little flying pieces of porcelain, but I'm sure that's easily gotten rid of.

Other: Wailords are (for once) allowed.

Round Six

Crazy Linoone (xO)

Riolu
Riley (F) <Steadfast>
Health: 41%
Energy: 68%
Status: Head feels like it’s going to explode. +4 Attack, -1 Sp. Def.
Commands: Earthquake ~ Earthquake ~ Endure

Bobino (xO)

Bronzor
Psytallica (N/A) <Heatproof>
Health: 81%
Energy: 62%
Status: Aching after the Earthquake, but in much better condition than its opponent.
Commands: Psychic ~ Psychic ~ Psychic

Riley rubbed his temples in agitation, hoping to dispel his headache. It didn’t work. Now even more annoyed, he gave a howl of frustration and pain and slammed his fists against the kitchen floor. Nearby tiles cracked along the edges against the immense force. Still howling, Riley continued to pound the earth until the entire kitchen was shaking, causing a few more containers to drop to the ground and shatter in a flurry of broken glass and dried herbs. A glowing container labeled ‘awesomesauce’ broke against the floor about two meters from Riley. Its contents, a wondrous multi-coloured liquid, spilled out.

Psytallica itself, though, felt like it was going to shatter just like the glass bottles. It was dashed repeatedly upon the tiles until its entire body was sore and aching. If the Bronzor had been a Pokemon made of flesh, it would have no doubt been sporting many new bruises. It clicked angrily as it hauled itself back into a ‘standing’ position, wincing slightly as it laid its weight on a dented metallic sphere.

Psytallica’s eyes flashed with grim satisfaction. Time for retribution. For the umpteenth time in the match, its eyes began to glow a soft pink as he invaded Riley’s mind. The black and blue canine began to howl again, but this time in agony, as Psytallica forcefully pounded at his brain. This time, the Bronzor didn’t concern itself with what parts of the brain it was hitting, causing Riley to shiver with cold, twitch crazily, and yelp random incomprehensible phrases, among other embarrassing things.

After what felt like a long, long time, Psytallica’s grip on Riley’s mind loosened, and the Riolu seized the opportunity to smash all four paws against the earth. Unable to stand up to the force, the two holes in the kitchen floor groaned and fell in on themselves. The Bronzor’s concentration snapped as it was once again jostled about painfully, and when the shaking finally stopped, it was left with twice as many dents as before. This time, it didn’t even bother standing back up – it was just going to cause it more grief, and at any rate it didn’t need to stand to perform a successful Psychic.

Psytallica’s eyes flashed pink once again, and Riley found himself in the painful grips of a mental assault once more. The agony escalated until he simply couldn’t contain it, and the Riolu let out a scream that rent the air around him. When the Psychic finally ended, he was left bowing on all fours, head hanging down, and panting for breath. He wasn’t sure if he could stand another one.

Of course, there was at least one way around that. Riley painfully struggled to his feet and spread them shoulder’s-width apart, bracing himself against the floor. Then he clasped his front paws to his chest. His body began to exude a blue glow as he concentrated fiercely, determined to survive the next attack no matter what. When Psytallica invaded his mind again with the purpose of fainting the Riolu at last, sweat broke out on his brow as he fought to stay conscious. After fifteen seconds or so, Psytallica loosened its psychic hold, expecting Riley to collapse on the floor, and blinking in shock when it saw that the canine had stubbornly evaded defeat.

Crazy Linoone (xO)

Riolu
Riley (F) <Steadfast>
Health: 1%
Energy: 48%
Status: Hanging onto his last shred of consciousness. +4 Attack, -1 Sp. Def.

Bobino (xO)

Bronzor
Psytallica (N/A) <Heatproof>
Health: 43%
Energy: 43%
Status: Surprised.

Terrain notes
There were two holes in the kitchen floor; they’ve caved in now. The caved-in hole farther away from Psytallica and Riley leads straight down and widens into a small underground chamber. That chamber then slopes up into another tunnel which abruptly becomes level close to the surface and emerges about a foot away from Psytallica.
Glass now litters the arena close to the counters where bottles have dropped, and various seasoning and sauces accompany the glass.
A bottle of awesomesauce has broken on the floor two meters from Riley. Drinking the awesomesauce will recover 5% ~ 10% health.

Final notes
Crazy Linoone attacks first next round.
Not like anyone’s really gonna use the awesomesauce at this stage of the game, but it seemed such a shame to have the entire battle go by without using any of the kitchen aspects.
And sorry for the late reffing. Exams, summitives, and all that crap. I didn’t even notice I had gone over the DQ time. :/
 
Ahhhh sorry! I didn't see this!

Reversal + Earthquake if you can; if you can't, just Reversal. Continue until you/the bronze plate dies, but if it uses Protect, Chill.

Reversal + Earthquake/Reversal/Chill ~ Reversal + Earthquake/Reversal/Chill ~ Reversal/Chill
 
Ok Psytallica. Last round. We can do this. First, This may sound weird, but I need you to protect. If not, you could get hurt bad. Do that twice... Here's the key, if you survive the reversal you're going to get hit with, use Faint Attack. We cannot afford to miss this attack. You can do it!

Protect ~ Protect ~ Faint Attack
 
Going to go ahead and give blazheirio889 a few days warning before asking for an e-ref.

I noticed to posted in the absence sheet you might be a few days late, but I've seen you reffing other stuff around here.

Figured I'd be cool and warn you / bump this in case you forgot about me. =(
 
"Other stuff" would mean that one round for Mike vs. BlazieAura vs. Lord Shyguy, am I right? Honestly, I was so busy that it took an entire week to make that one reffing. Exams and stuff are over, so I'll be able to get this up in a day or two, but since my absence ended on Thursday I technically have six days left.

Thanks for being patient and giving me a heads-up, nonetheless.
 
"Other stuff" would mean that one round for Mike vs. BlazieAura vs. Lord Shyguy, am I right? Honestly, I was so busy that it took an entire week to make that one reffing. Exams and stuff are over, so I'll be able to get this up in a day or two, but since my absence ended on Thursday I technically have six days left.

Thanks for being patient and giving me a heads-up, nonetheless.

Sorry, didn't mean it to sound rude. Obviously I came off a bit rude since you seemed a bit upset about the post. I apologize if you took it that way, and as this is my first battle, didn't know the correct procedure. I really was just trying to be nice. Sorry if I offended.
 
2vs2 single
Style: Switch
DQ: Standard week
Damage Cap: 99%
Banned Moves: OHKO's
Arena: Kitchen of Madness

It's actually not a food item this time.

The Kitchen of Madness actually isn't that insane -- it's a rectangular room, slightly larger than the size of a normal arena. There are two cooking counters on each side of the arena, and each counter belongs to one of the trainers. Like regular kitchen counters, there's two sinks, large drawers filled with silverware, stacks of plates, bowls... You name it. There are also several knives sitting in a knifeholder on the each counter, as well as some cutting boards. There is a fridge to the left of each counter, and one can pretty much find any food imaginable inside the fridge. To the right of the counter is a oven and a gas-powered stove top, a perfect place to bake some pies or blow up some propane tanks. A few pots and pans are on the stove top as well as in the drawer underneath the oven.

On request, half of the arena can be sunk down and flooded with water to allow water-only pokemon to battle.

This all sounds like a perfectly normal kitchen until one realizes that every single item in the kitchen can be used as weapons. The knives, spoons, plates, flying pans... Yes, even the frozen turkey in the freezer can be thrown at the enemy. After a bit of testing in a test arena, Linoone has made a chart showing the average damage different types of items do on impact (and they do quite a lot of damage indeed...)

Porcelain and glass (such as plates and, well, glasses): 3% on impact, 1% if shards are stepped on.
Small objects (like spoons and spice bottles): 5%
Sharp pointy things (such as knives, forks, and frozen swordfish heads): 10% if hit by the sharp edge (30% chance), 4% otherwise.
Large, heavy things (like frying pans and frozen turkeys): 12%, but only have 90% accuracy.
The referee: Instant disqualification.

The objects generally take 3% energy to throw, but small objects take only 2% and large, heavy things cost 5%. Thrown objects are considered to have 100% accuracy besides large, heavy things, which only have 90%.

The crazy projectiles don't stop there. You can heat up items on the stove and throw them for a chance of burning your opponent, lob ice cubes at them and hope they catch a cold, force feed them rotten eggs and make them get food poisoning... The possibilities are endless.

Ok, fine, so thrown items aren't that insane. So why is this place called the Kitchen of Madness? The true reason is that the referee will get so tired of rolling the dice that he/she/it will go mad. Yup. That's the reason. Oh, and the little flying pieces of porcelain, but I'm sure that's easily gotten rid of.

Other: Wailords are (for once) allowed.

Round Seven

Riolu
Riley (F) <Steadfast>
Health: 1%
Energy: 48%
Status: Hanging onto his last shred of consciousness. +4 Attack, -1 Sp. Def.
Commands: Reversal + Earthquake/Reversal/Chill ~ Reversal + Earthquake/Reversal/Chill ~ Reversal/Chill

Bobino (xO)

Bronzor
Psytallica (N/A) <Heatproof>
Health: 43%
Energy: 43%
Status: Surprised.
Commands: Protect ~ Protect ~ Faint Attack

Psytallica raised a metaphorical eyebrow at its trainer’s commands. It was still in relatively good condition; it wouldn’t kick the bucket from a single attack, would it? Nevertheless, the Bronzor quickly fashioned a dome of pure energy around itself. Riley glared at his opponent, registering the pale green sparkle of the Protect. Unfortunately, there was nothing he could do about it. Though he’d much rather lick some of the awesomesauce off the kitchen floor, Riley sat down and closed his eyes. Psytallica clicked in irritation as it realized its opponent had no intention of attacking, and let its shield dissolve into thin air. Riley snorted, but made no other move.

Psytallica fidgeted. It was still feeling rather drained – Protect was a difficult move to hold, after all – but orders were orders, and it attempted to form another sphere of impenetrable power. “Attempted” was the key word. No matter how hard the bronze plate tried, the energy refused to solidify, and after several moments it was forced to give up.

Riley seized the opportunity. Howling with rage and desperation, he ran up to Psytallica and began pummeling it with all his might, each blow ringed with fighting energy and driven by an intense will to snatch victory from his opponent. Some of the punches even dented Psytallica’s sturdy metal body. The Bronzor let out a grating screech which sounded like nails on a chalkboard; Riley winced, but kept up his assault until he was forced to step back, exhausted but proud. On the other hand, Psytallica was bent grotesquely out of shape. It looked like it had gone through an incinerator and then melded hastily back into shape by a three year-old.

As Psytallica lay on its back and blinked at the ceiling, trying to collect its bearings, Riley cracked his knuckles, looming over his hapless foe with a nasty leer and confident smirk. Just one round ago the bipedal canine was at the mercy of Psytallica; now, it was the other way around. The only difference was that the Bronzor had no insurance.

Riley raised a fist, clenching it so hard that it looked like the bones would pop out from beneath his skin and fur any moment; seeing this, Psytallica panicked and tried to cloak itself in dark energy to escape its impending doom, but it was much too slow. The first punch was so vicious that Psytallica’s concentration was broken like a dry twig, and the brutality only escalated from there. Even though the Bronzor’s Psychic type counteracted its weakness to Fighting, the blows were incredibly painful, and before the Reversal was completed, it shuddered and succumbed to unconsciousness. Riley gave an exhausted whoop and his foe a final kick, sending it spinning across the tiled floor. He was not far from becoming comatose himself, and he was approaching exhaustion, but damn no victory ever felt more rewarding.

Riolu
Riley (F) <Steadfast>
Health: 1%
Energy: 44%
Status: Proud of himself. +4 Attack, -1 Sp. Def.

Bobino (xO)

Bronzor
Psytallica (N/A) <Heatproof>
Health: 0%
Energy: 35%
Status: Knocked out!

Terrain notes
There were two holes in the kitchen floor; they’ve caved in now. The caved-in hole farther away from Psytallica and Riley leads straight down and widens into a small underground chamber. That chamber then slopes up into another tunnel which abruptly becomes level close to the surface and emerges about a foot away from Psytallica.
Glass now litters the arena close to the counters where bottles have dropped, and various seasoning and sauces accompany the glass.
A bottle of awesomesauce has broken on the floor two meters from Riley. Drinking the awesomesauce will recover 5% ~ 10% health.

Final notes
Psytallica’s second Protect failed. You fickle RNG gods, you.
Psytallica fainted on the 3rd action.
And may I say, 7% energy for 31% damage is incredibly, incredibly broken.
Also, Bobino, I'm just a bit touchy about deadlines and stuff ^^; I get a bit defensive when people mention that I've missed them. Sorry if I upset you/startled you/whatever.

The battle is over, and Crazy Linoone is the winner! She – it? – gets $16, Bobino gets $6, and I got $10 for reffing. Close game, you two – honestly I thought Riley was going to faint for sure.

Kwak’waka and Riley both get 2 EXP – Riley gets 1 point towards happiness evolution, as well – while Majin and Psytallica both get 1 EXP.
 
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HOLY CRUD. DID I JUST WIN.

The money won will be put into the fund to build a shrine for the RNG gods. And good game, Bobino! That was really, really, ridiculously close.
 
Good game to you too.

I knew if one of those combo attacks hit I was toast, was just hoping to bypass them, take a non-combo super-effective attack and ping the last bit of health off.

Well played.

Thank so very much to blazheirio for reffing this. My first ever full match, and some great reffing made it possible. Well done all around.
 
Thing is, Earthquake and Reversal can't be combined, I don't think :P Had the RNG gods decided on a slightly lower number (Psytallica rolled a 56), Bobino would've won for sure. Good game, both of you~
 
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