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Warriors Fan Club

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Which badfic? If it was me, it was a typo, sorry. :( I removed it anyway, because 11 people actually e-mailed me, told me it was made of fail and should be abandoned. Based on the size of my site at this time, that's pretty much everyone who visits :( oh well..

Topic switch anyone?
 
(Tell me if these need to go in spoiler tags; they're so close to the beginning of the series that I didn't think they would.)

Well, I did think that at first there was a mistake in Battles of the Clans because I thought that Oakheart had killed Redtail, but then my sister gave me a lecture that it was in fact that Redtail had killed Oakheart and then Tigerclaw who killed Redtail. Little did I know that reading the next paragraph would have clarified. XD

Also, I'm thinking of writing a Warriors fanfiction, about pretty much anything, but the problem is that I start with a plot and never finish it because my ideas come to an abrupt end. Any hints?
 
Darksong said:
Well, I did think that at first there was a mistake in Battles of the Clans because I thought that Oakheart had killed Redtail, but then my sister gave me a lecture that it was in fact that Redtail had killed Oakheart and then Tigerclaw who killed Redtail. Little did I know that reading the next paragraph would have clarified. XD
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well other than the fact that Oakheart's death was more of an accident than Redtail's fault... x3

As for the fanfic thing, what I do is plan out the entire plot before I start, so that I have a good idea of where my next chapter should go and don't get stuck with writer's block. You might want to try that.
 
Wow, I'm not the only one coming up with ideas for a fanfic, huh? Yeah, I've been planning a mini-series of four also, but I probably won't ever post it on this site. If you see something on Fanfiction.net that has a cat named Lilypaw/Lizardpaw in the near future, it's most likely me.
And, like Starshine, I always right it down in my journal. I actually have written out the entire plot for the first and second two, I just need some minor details and a few extra characters just to stand around and patrol and whatnot.
 
Thanks, Starshine, Leafpool and sreservoir. I think I have a notebook with Darkrai on it where I could write. And don't worry about the spellchecking part -- I secretly get annoyed when people I really know spell something wrong. xD

- proceeds to read fanfic -

I'll critique a little bit generally using this bit as an example:

...I want to send a sign, a sign something's wrong." she stated. " But Yellowfang, that could just scare some cats, or possibly make them think we are angry with them!" meowed Mudfur. He had a point. " What we really need is a hero" spoke Spottedleaf.
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First, at the end of a quote, always put a comma (or a question mark if it's a question, or an exclamation point if it's an... exclamation), and if it's a complete sentence, put a period after that part afterward, which in this case is "she stated." However, if it's not a complete sentence, then put a comma after that part and continue the quote in a new set of quotation marks, ending with something other than a comma.
Second, always start another paragraph when a new person speaks (That way, we can clearly tell where Yellowfang is not speaking anymore.) or where they start on a new action or subject.

Generally, I would recommend capitalizing the "Clan" part of anything relating to the cats, even in the middle of the word; this means typing "ThunderClan," "StarClan," etc. instead of "Thunderclan" and "Starclan." Also, pay attention to punctuation (especially commas) in the middle of sentences. Also, just a small think I noticed. Things ending in "y" (except those with a vowel before the y, and names) get their y changed to "ies" when they're plural. Thus, it's "prophecies" instead of "prophecys."

I like this one so far, actually; it's not fail, especially for an 11-year-old.
 
Oh, yes. I forgot that part since I tend to always put the "s/he said" at the end of everything instead of continuing it afterward. I guess I'm just the confusing one. xD I suppose that what the stuff in that grammar lesson is true, although I was just too absentminded and in a rush to finish it.
 
I've been out of school for two weeks, and I forget grammar. XD I wrote a book the day before school ended, and I forget grammar. XD Thanks for the reviews, everyone! :D I'll edit my story, and maybe put up a new chapter later.
 
damn, we need a warriors corpus of textual quotations of every phrase used, word, and proper noun. that way I can actually check the usage rate of words.

(my capitalization is idiosyncratic.)

"May every medicine cat from the past generation gather here for a meeting," Yellowfang meowed. The previous medicine cat of ThunderClan wanted to address all the Clans about trouble beside the lake."As you well know, there is trouble at the Moonpool. The twolegs have been constructing some sort of... thing. No cat could possibly tell what it is at this point. They also polluted it with toxic sludge. I want to send a sign, a sign something's wrong." she stated. " But Yellowfang, that could just scare some cats, or possibly make them think we are angry with them!" meowed Mudfur. He had a point. " What we really need is a hero." Spottedleaf replied.
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spaces after unary and closing, and before opening; but not before closing and unaries, or after opening. `Twolegs is always capitalized: `Twolegs, as opposed to `twolegs (the random graves is one of the idiosyncratic conventions I follow for technical writing; suffice to say it quotes a single identifier). as a rule, don't use technical or scientific terms - `pollute, `toxic, `sludge are not in warriors vocabulary; suggest replacement with `poison. `constructing might be better expressed as `building. only one character's dialogue should be in each paragraph, usually breaking when it starts describing the character speaking.

A small she-kit with starlight in her fur padded up to Yellowfang and whispered, " Mother, maybe I could do something about it..." she trailed off. Yellowfang replied, " A cat with blurred vision returning to the clans to save the Moonpool? You have great courage, but that's nearly impossible!" however, Yellowfang didn't bother whispering. " But I've seen the prophecies, and how they play out. I can do it!" The kit protested.
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above punctuation and dialogue notes.

" You know, the cats with impossible odds usually prevail. " replied Runningnose. "My daughter, save the Moonpool? I cant say I wouldn't be proud, but....," Yellowfang sighed. " How will we possibly send her back? It was difficult enough to send Cinderpelt... or rather Cinderheart now. We can't just send down StarClan cats to live amongst the clans whenever they want!"
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you need to to fix that misspelled "can't"; and no comma after ellipses. also, above dialogue notes.

"How will we blah" doesn't make much sense; they know how they will send her, it's the ability they lack. also, you're using `can afterward, so be consistent (and logical) and use `can.

" Do you have any better ideas?" Spottedleaf asked. Yellowfang tensed,... and sighed again. "Alright, you have a point. But should we send a sign?" All the Medicine cats had one unanimous answer: "Yes!" Yellowfang lowered her voice. " Alright. I shall speak to Jayfeather tonight. My daughter will be going to ThunderClan."
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narrators that are not using present tense should not need ellipses. try "Yellowfang tensed for a moment, then sighed again." use `will instead of `shall here. above dialogue notes.

you might want to read up on some punctuation and dialogue formatting, and can/may/will/shall.

(I sprinkle random punctuation all over the place. one of these days, I'll do a write-up on it, but for now, just bear with me.)

incidentally, can you make highlighting actually highlight the text?

disagreements can be argued over and/or settled.

EDIT: epic ninja.
 
As of now, I've planned out the first seven chapters (prologue included as a chapter) of my Warriors fanfiction. I also have too many ideas for names, as always. >< The main character is a rogue tom living in an abandoned area of a Twolegplace (neighborhood), but that's all I know about now. My many name ideas are...

Stormheart [gray tabby], Ashspots [gray + white], Brokencloud [gray, black + white] Crowshadow [black + white], Foxstripe [brown tabby], Hawkfur [long russet pelt], and Jaggedtip [brown with dark tail tip], Owlstrike [light tawny + white], Ripplestream [light gray tabby], Smokewind [solid gray with blue eyes], Swallowtip [blue-gray with patches of gray], and Swifttail [brown with lighter patches]. I also have Goldenflight [gold with blue eyes], but if I used that, I would change the main character to a she-cat.
This is always the biggest dilemma I have. :P
 
I love the Warriors books. I am still on the second to last one of the first series though. Haven't really had enough time to read up and finish the first series.
 
My plot was along the lines of how it's been moons upon moons since the Clans were how we imagine them now, roughly around twenty years in human years. The Clans have in a way 'evolved', and the locations and names have changed. I promise you that the names are not AirClan, WaterClan, etc. They're named after what was considered the 'best' leaders from the earlier generations(TallClan, FireClan, and so forth). Also, warrior names have changed to become things like Belovedtail, Praisepelt, Worthyheart, Honorfur, but some of the more traditional names have stayed(Willowpurr, Yellowstar, Flowercloud). The main character is a young apprentice named Lilypaw(yes I named her after the meaning of my name shut up I'm not the center of my world) and she goes through training, love, battles, adventure, I don't want to give away the details.
 
All right. I've decided on the name Brokencloud for my main character's warrior name. I've also finished my outline -- the story is 14 chapters long, including a prologue, 12 middle chapters and an epilogue. I'll probably write up the first chapter on Wands and Worlds sometime today; as soon as I finish this little game I'm playing, and maybe the Flipnote I'm working on, I'll write it up. Oddly, I still have no title.

...Maybe I should think of that first. xD
 
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