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TIME FOR SOME STORIES

OH WOW

FUCKING AWESOME

SO LIKE THE OTHER DAY I WAS THINKING ABOUT MEAT. AND I MUST HAVE BEEN THINKING ALOUD BECAUSE WILL TURNS TO ME WITH THIS SURPRISED LOOK AND STARTS TALKING ABOUT HOW IT'S MORALLY WRONG. UNFORTUNATELY HE STILL HAS THE SAME IRRITATINGLY CONDESCENDING ARGUMENT ON HOW CLEARLY I NEED TO ASCEND TO THE HIGHER THINKING.

ALL I COULD SAY WAS THAT I'M SURPRISED TO HEAR YOU ARE A VEGETARIAN AND A HIGHER DEGREE OF PERSON BECAUSE STEVE MUST BE PRETTY MAD THAT YOU ATE HIS MEAT.

WILL DOESN'T BRING THAT UP ANYMORE.
 
It was real funny on our last day of school. We were about to head out to the talent show we had set up, and we were in math class watching a movie and playing games and stuff because hell it was the last day of school. Then it started raining, and people kinda ignored it until it started raining real hard, then everyone got up and ran to the window and watched as the streets flooded and it started to hail. And then the lightning and thunder started, but the real fun started when the power went out. Then everyone started cheering, and the power went back on and we were all frowning and booing. Then it went out again and didn't come back on, and the tornadoes started and we all had to sit in a little classroom with eighth graders, and I kidnapped one of the two flashlights we had so I could read my books while the lights were out. We got to go out in a calm spot and look at the cars, and the principal's back window was shattered into his back seat and all of the cars had dents and cracked windows, and a boy said he was thirsty and popped a hailstone in his mouth, and then he spat it out and made a sour face and said it was salty. Then we went back inside and sat in the hall for about two hours because the streets were flooded and we couldn't go to the talent show, so we got a bouncy ball and started throwing it around and bouncing it off the lockers until our parents started getting off work and picking us up, and then the buses managed to come, and right when I was about to get on mine my mom came.

So yeah, it was fun :3

And I don't want to post in all caps.

Oh yeah, and once my stepsister and I were at home with only our two teenage cousins 'cause our parents were out, and we were just sitting there and stuff and we heard a loud popping noise from across the street, so we ran into the bathroom and locked all the doors and they piled us in the bathtub, and drew the curtains and made us lay down while one stood with her back on the door and she was pushing on it in case someone managed to unlock the door, and one was sitting on the toilet, because we all thought it was gunfire. So we sat there for about an hour and finally came out and found out it was a car that had backfired.

Tongue slip:

"Is dad coming back down soon?"
"Yeah, why?"
"I wanted to shit- I mean, sit in his chair."

I don't even cuss at home, so it was real funny.
 
OH WELL TOO BAD. MY CAPS LOCK IS BROKEN ANYWAY~

SOLIKE TODAY I SAW SOMETHING OUT OF THE GLASS DOOR. WANTING TO GET A CLOSER LOOK, MY RIGHT FOOT, STEPPING, TRIPPED SIDEWAYS ON MY LEFT FOOT AND I ALMOST FELL.
 
WTH WHY ARE WE TALKING IN ALL CAPS.

ANYWAY I HAVE A STORY FROM LONG AGO.
WHEN I WAS AROUND 6 YEARS OLD I WAS LIKE TO MY MOM ONE DAY,
"MOM LET'S PLAY SOME SMASH BROS SO I CAN KICK YOUR ASS." I MEANT TO SAY KICK YOUR BUTT BUT ASS JUST SLIPPED OUT. I WAS 6 REMEMBER.
SHE WAS LIKE "WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?" AND SHE FOUND IT FUNNY THAT I SAID THAT. EXCEPT I WAS IN TEARS AFRAID SHE'D TELL MY DAD CAUSE I THOUGHT I'D GET IN TROUBLE.
YET SHE THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY. >.>
YEAH.
 
Dewgongeru said:
VYRAURA THE BATHROOM ONE IS WONDERFUL
Click to expand...

THAT REMINDS ME OF ANOTHER STUPID BATHROOM STORY

SO LIKE WE'RE IN 4TH GRADE AND SOME ASSISTANT TEACHER'S BIRTHDAY IS THE LAST DAY OF SCHOOL. AND WE'RE ALL LIKE OMG PARTY! SO WE GET THE TEACHER TO AGREE AND WE PLAN A SUPER SECRET PARTY.

SO IT ALL GOES WELL AND WE'RE HIDING IN VARIOUS PLACES. I OF COURSE END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH WHAT MUST BE THE 5 STUPIDEST GUYS IN THE FUCKING CLASSROOM. IN ABOUT 2 MINUTES, ALEX IS FLUSHING THE TOILET SO FAST IT'S OVERFLOWING, TYLER IS CLIMBING OVER THE STALL WALLS, JOHN IS HACKING LOOGIES INTO THE SINK, AND STEVEN AND MATT ARE WRESTLING IN THE CORNER.

I'M JUST AWKWARDLY STANDING THERE, AND THEN SUDDENLY ALEX DECIDES THAT IT'S TIME NOW TO GO OUT IN FACT WE'RE PROBABLY LATE. NOT WANTING TO MISS OUT ON THE PARTY WE ALL STOP BEING IDIOTS AND BURST OUT OF THE DOOR, SCREAMING EXULTATIONS.

THE REST OF THE CLASS BURSTS OUT LAUGHING AND ARGUING WHEN WE REALIZE THAT THE TEACHER WHO'S BIRTHDAY IT IS WILL BE THERE IN ABOUT 5 MINUTES.
 
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