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Umm.... Help? Please?

D

donotlookatdiagram

New member
Okay, so, I want to put my first fic up on here. But I just want to know: The prologue is extremely short. Would it be okay to post the prologue and then post the first chapter? (the first chapter is nowhere near being done.)
 
...Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand..... posted.
One more question. In the first chapter, we have this little exchange: (Names have been changed)
"A... Follow me." B said warmly. A exited the cell as B locked it, locking C and D inside. "So, did you have fun?" B inquired.
"Well, D was kind of preventing me from doing so, so no. No fun." A sulked slightly.
"Well, we certainly can't have our guest go without entertaining herself, can we?" B smirked. "You will have alone time with C. Promise."
"Thank you very much." A replied, grinning.
Click to expand...
...Is it just me, or does this sound like A wants to rape C? (She doesn't, but it kinda sounds like it to me.)
 
It is a little creepy. Maybe rephrase it to something like, "You will get a chance to talk with C."
 
Thanks for the advice! I could not get that to work for my life.
Now it is
"You will have a chance to talk with C without D in the way. Promise." Is that any better?
 
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