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Funeral plans

Kung Fu Ferret

The Trickster God
Pronoun
he/him
(Note: I recently had a death in my family [a cousin to be precise], which is the reason I made this thread)
Say you were going to die soon, and you had to prepare your own funeral....
If I were to plan my own funeral...

1. Since I am an adamant atheist, I want absolutely none of that "God" stuff at my funeral in its entirety.
2. If possible, I want "I Don't Want to Say Goodbye" from PMD Explorers followed by Aerith's theme from Final Fantasy VII to be played.
3. I don't want any total strangers and/or people I hate at my funeral.
4. I'd like as many family members and friends to pay respects as possible, but for Pete's sake, no embarrassing stories about me, even though I'd be dead.
5. I want the epitaph on my tombstone to say "Is there a reset button on this thing?"

If this is in the wrong section, could a mod move it for me?
 
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Vipera Magnifica

Aquatic Artiste
Pronoun
he/him
I once had an idea about starting a company that would record videos for people to be played at their own funerals. I, for one, would love to give my own eulogy. Bringing a bit of comedy to my funeral is important.

Also, to ease the pain of loss, I would record a series of video diaries addressed to my loved ones. My lawyer would only release one video a week though. That way, even in death, I would be able to talk to my family and friends and ease them through the grieving process.

also yeah a viking funeral would be nice.
 

ultraviolet

yeehaw
Staff member
Pronoun
she/her
I haven't really thought about it a lot? But one of my housemates wants to be sent into space when he dies.

Sorry for your loss.
 

Music Dragon

Doosic Maggon
Pronoun
she
When Zhuangzi was dying, his disciples wanted to give him a lavish funeral. Said Zhuangzi:

"I have heaven and earth for my outer and inner coffin, the sun and the moon for my pair of jade disks, the stars for my pearls, the myriad creatures for my farewell presents. Is anything missing in my funeral paraphernalia? What will you add to these?"

"Master, we are afraid that the crows and kites will eat you."

"Above ground, I'll be eaten by the crows and kites; below ground, I'll be eaten by the ants and mole crickets. You rob one of them to give to the other; how come you like them so much better?"
 

Espeon

Mmhm...
I've never really thought this through in immaculate detail; in all honesty, I keep forgetting that at some point I am going to die and also seem to think that people won't want to attend my funeral or something. I dunno. Either that or I'd feel like I was being left out of some kind of important social occasion where all of my friends and family will be? ...yeah.

Sorry to hear about your cousin passing away, also. :(
 

Light

Night Zero
Possible trigger warning?

When I die I want to be cremated, as a symbol. My ashes to be put in a small urn and kept, or scattered somewhere; I haven't decided.

I don't like society's ritual of burial. It's the illusion that when we die, our identity remains unbroken. "Going underground" is a good symbol, but I don't like the immobility it implies.

Also I'm curious; what's TCoD's opinion on this kind of serious symbolic analysis?
 

Butterfree

Still loves Joltik, though!
Staff member
Pronoun
she/her
I honestly can't really get myself to care much about how my funeral happens. I'll be dead; I won't be around to care. I'd hope it's a humanist ceremony since making it religious would be pretty dishonest, but other than that... it's my relatives who are going to be the ones attending the funeral and looking at my tombstone, so let them figure out what they feel is the best way to remember me.

And sorry about your cousin.
 

MampersandF

bastard of puppets
Pronoun
any
I don't want to be buried or cremated. I'd like for as much of my remains to be donated -- for organ transplants, scientific research, whatever. I'd much prefer for something useful to be done with my corpse, specially since it's ulitmately as good as any other thing as far as mementos go.

Beyond that, I've fully accepted that I probably won't like what people will do for my funeral (I bet they won't even namedrop Rayquaza once) and it won't really matter because I won't be around for it when it happens, so the show's really for them.

But I suppose the whole point of this thread is a hypothetical situation in which it's wholly up to you. And to be honest, if it were, I probably just wouldn't do a funeral in the first place. But if I really had to have and plan one, I suppose I'd just keep it simple and religionless. And oh, I'd pay someone to burst in and change the subject to Rayquaza.
 

Kung Fu Ferret

The Trickster God
Pronoun
he/him
Thanks, Butterfree.


To add to my first post, I would like my body to be buried within three days of my death, because I found it a bit creepy that my cousin was buried yesterday (the wake was Friday), despite the fact that she died this past Monday. Why do they take so long?!
 

hopeandjoy

yan ya yan ya yaa iii yaaa
Thanks, Butterfree.


To add to my first post, I would like my body to be buried within three days of my death, because I found it a bit creepy that my cousin was buried yesterday (the wake was Friday), despite the fact that she died this past Monday. Why do they take so long?!
They embalm people who want to be buried most of the time.
 

Dar

oops, did it again
Pronoun
they
I don't really care if I'm buried, cremated, or how my funeral is supposed to go. I just want whoever goes to celebrate instead of grieve.
 

Murkrow

Says "also" and "or something" a lot
Pronoun
he
All I know is I don't want to be cremated. I know it's silly but I feel like if my body's still mostly intact, there's still hope for me.
 

kyeugh

Well-known member
Pronoun
she/her
I do not want a large, festive funeral. It would be ideal if my closest friends and family paid their dues if it is their wish, and then bury my body beside the rest of my family, assuming I don't die young. I don't want invitations to be sent for my funeral. People should be informed of my death, and if they wish to pay their respects, they may.
 

Kung Fu Ferret

The Trickster God
Pronoun
he/him
Sorry, but I'm bringing up this thread because my Grandma died last week, and the funeral is in early on in the new year, and this topic has been in my head again ever since.

Maybe I'll have my body donated to science?

A Viking funeral, if possible, would be great.

The Egyptian-style mummification process is (unfortunately) out of the question due to the fact that I live in the Northeastern U.S. and the crazy New England weather is far from ideal for preserving mummies.

Whatever they do, I do not want to be put on display for years like a certain communist leader.
 
Pronoun
he/him
I would probably like a natural burial, or some other inexpensive thing. A natural burial is when they bury you in just a shroud. I don't want to be embalmed. Did you know that formaldehyde (the chemical used for embalming) is actually a carcinogen?
Anyway, funerals are crazy expensive and they don't even support local businesses.

https://youtu.be/OGqbALhpUmM
(a part of the Adam Ruins Death episode, sources are at the top right of the video. I highly suggest finding the full episode on your TV provider's guide or something. It's very informative.)
 
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