Omegle

[Teh Ebil Snorlax]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hi
You: Hey.
Stranger: M or f
You: M.
You: You?
Stranger: F
You: Cool.
Stranger: Horny?
You: Not even slightly.
Stranger: I could change that
You: Doubtful.
Stranger: U sure bout that
You: Yes, yes I am.
Stranger: Well then can I suck your dick so that I can deal better
You: "deal"?
You: Does having a cock in your mouth make you better at blackjack or something?
Your conversational partner has disconnected

 

[Worst Username Ever]

You: ...Daddy! You're back!
You: I've missed you so much... *hugs*
Stranger: I didn't miss you, creep child
Stranger: *bats away*
Stranger: HAND ME THE PAPER
You: Where did you go all these years anyway? You never told...
Stranger: I went to the shop.
Stranger: To buy baked beans
Stranger: Like I said
You: And that took 10 years?
Stranger: Now gimme the paper!
You: Paper? Which paper?
Stranger: There was a very large queue
Stranger: THE NEWSPAPER
You: Ok*gives newspaper*
Stranger: *slaps with newspaper*
Stranger: Never let people boss you around.
You: Yeah... guess I've learned my lesson...
Stranger: Good
You: Anyway, I somehow doubt your story,.
Stranger: I'd like to see you get some baked beans in better time
You: The queue couldn't possibly be THAT long.
Stranger: It was the only shop for miles
You: Sure, if you say so.
Stranger: Damn straight

Stranger: hello..
You: Hi. Ask me anything, and I will answer.
You: So, any questions?
Stranger: kk
Stranger: u
Stranger: a
Stranger: bear?
Stranger: are
You: No.
Stranger: hmmm
You: At least I was not the last time I checked.
Stranger: hows your love life?
Stranger: lmao
You: Nah, single and loving it.
Stranger: deadly
You: So if you're asking for a date, thanks but no thanks.
Stranger: lmao
Stranger: im good! XD
Stranger: whats your name
Stranger: Mines charlie
You: My name is not important.
You: What's important is spreading my knowledge to others.
You: And I specialize in questions that's not about myself.
Stranger: oh okay XD
Stranger: oh reallyz?
Stranger: spread away!!
Stranger: lol
You: So...
You: GOOD DAY TO YOU SIR
Stranger: sooo....
You: I MUST GO
Stranger: lol
Stranger: kk

 

[Zeph]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: ...Hello?
Stranger: hiiii
You: ...Are you there?
Stranger: no obviously not love
You: ...Oh...
Stranger: yeah it's a shame because now you miss me
You: ...That's right... *Sniffle*
Stranger: but anyway lol.............who are you?
You: ...I'm alone and afraid
Stranger: Why are you afraid?
You: ...There's nobody here in the dark and the cold...
Stranger: just you sitting in the corner on your computer with a dim light on
You: ...No...
You: ...All the way out here where nobody hears you cry...
Stranger: well if you are alone then I doubt that someone will hear you cry
Stranger: You are waaaaaay too over emotional! and i have only been talking to you for 2 mins
You: ...YO DON'T UNDERSTAND! MY PLANET JUST IMPLODED!
You: ...Oh god I'm sorry I didn't mean to shout...
Stranger: your planet? YES, THE SILENCE OF THE CAPITAL LETTERS ON A SCREEN IS CONSIDERED SHOUTING
You: ...I was shouting in my head...
You: ...And yes, my planet. Astor'gibeth. It's... gone... All my family, too...
Stranger: Is that some kind of thing on that warcraft world
You: ...I have no idea what you're talking about...
You: ...I mean my planet, the place I was born and raised... The almighty Kroxkij of Fen-balitor-C came and he erased beautiful Astor'gibeth in one swipe...
Stranger: yeah well i have no idea what your talking about.....................firstly you go on about being alone, afraid and sad and something about planets............... looook for your own good, just get out of this fantasy world that you are living in.....make some friends and have a reality.... a life
You: ...My life has gone at the hands of the Kroxkij...
You: ...You humans never understand. There are things, terrible things, beyond your little planet...
You: ...I try to help you! Warn you of the dangers...
You: ....But you never listen.
Stranger: oh i get it.....your an "alien"
You: ...And besides... wjrdfrte diwr8385ee3f7cc f8grfedhehehhhhhhhhhj k 011011101001010101923847543343 sswrrrrrrrrrrrr SORRY MY COMPUTATO IS DISFLUCTUATING AND I CAN'T TALK FOR MUCH SHORTER
Stranger: you are probably someone obsessed with star wars, avatar and secretly harry potter but you don't want your (computer) friends to know that
You: YOU HAVE BEEN WARMED
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I'm not sure he got the joke.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hai
Stranger: asl?
You: Older than you can imagine / Skrale / Astor'gibeth
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

(This next one is typed out from what I can remember)

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: are you a horny 14 - 18 girl who wants to trade pics? If so add me on IAMSOHORNYLIKE@HORNY.HORN for webcam ;)
You: No.
You: I'm male.
You: And gay.
You: Get a life.
You: Seriously.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey, asl?
You: That's a god question.
You: In fact, a good one!
You: Not a god one.
You: God questions tend to get boring.
You: Yes.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Good evening... Or morning, or afternoon, or whichever.
Stranger: Fag
You: Yes!
You: I am!
You: I like men.
You: They're great.
You: Vaginas are icky.
Stranger: Your a fucking loser duuudeee
You: Why's that?
Stranger: Cause you like dicks
You: And that makes me a loser?
You: I fail to see your logic!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

It's funny because he couldn't back up his point.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Before you ask, no, I'm not horny and I don't want to see your willy. If you weren't going to ask, thank you for being a sensible person!
Stranger: hahahaha
Stranger: no i wasnt going to askk that
You: Oh good!
You: It's a bit annoying when that happens..
Stranger: yeah i know
Stranger: but i rarely see those people in here
You: I get them all the time..
You: Bit sad really
You: I begin to lsoe my faith in humanity
You: *lose
You: Damn typos
You: So, 'sup?
Stranger: i just heard i new song called drossfire .. what about you?
You: Interesting
You: I'mmmm passing time my using Omegle. And wearing ahat.
Stranger: lol what kind o hat?
You: A straw one
You: It's quite nice :3
Stranger: very confortable
Stranger: except when it itches
You: Yes...
You: So what country are you from?
You: Or, if you'd prefer, what planet?
Stranger: mars..
Stranger: wher you from?
You: Ahh, good place, Mars. A bit cold during the night, though.
You: I'm from Astor'Gibeth, in Polaris.
Stranger: O_O never been there
You: We don't get many visitors
You: Quite a small planet
You: Nice though!
Stranger: i heard you had great food over there
You: The whole place is a bit like the snowier parts of earth - if you've been there, that is
You: Yeah, we're famous for our cuisine. Especially Roasted Kasnark Eye.
You: That's a favourite for lightyears...
You: So how's Mars recently?
Stranger: i little bit hot.... and red, without mentioning all the tourists coming
Stranger: very noisy this days..
You: Ah... I am sympathetic for you, brother. Or sister?
Stranger: bro
Stranger: are you male?
You: Well, Skrale technically. But yes, pretty much.
Stranger: gud
Stranger: so..
Stranger: what kind of music do you like?
You: Oh, stuff from Tarrooss is good... The best. But, uh, if we're talking earth music, then a mixture, pretty much. Especially that one guy... Puccini? Is he recent?
Stranger: i heard he died...
Stranger: over 50 years ago
You: Ahh, drat.
You: Tchaikovsky?
Stranger: i think he is on the top charts iin earth
Stranger: but he died
You: Urgh. Always.
You: What about JLS? Or have I got that wrong too?
Stranger: surprisingly still alive
You: Are they the ones that sang Tocatta & Fugue in D Minor? Or am I wrong again?
Stranger: wrong
Stranger: jesus when was your last trip to earth?
You: Oh, ages ago.
You: When I was a simple duckling...
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I love it when they go along with what you're saying.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: On the other hand, earwigs could be considered a descendnt of the great Aggala of Prisinininik.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

 

[Wargle]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hi
Stranger: Open your heart to me, baby I hold the lock and you hold the key Open your heart to me, darlin' I'll give you love if you, you turn the key
You: I dip the key in acid
You: then break it
You: torch it
You: and throw it in the river
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I know it's probably a song but hey.

 

[Cypher FDP]

Stranger: UNDER JUNCTURE 69, OMEGLE IS REQUIRED TO INFORM YOU THAT YOU ARE NOW CHATTING WITH A CONVICTED SEX OFFENDER.
You: Your PARTY enters THE DARK CITADEL. YOu come across TWO BRANCHING PATHS. What do you do?
Stranger: BUT WHO WAS PHONE?!
You: You take your PHONE from the INVENTORY. What now?
Stranger: Use PHONE
You: YOU use your PHONE. Unfortunately, it has SHITTY reception. What now?
Stranger: Walk NORTH
You: YOU head NORTH, hoping to come across the rumored TREASURE. Your PARTY encounters a Werewolf. What do you do?
Stranger: Walk EAST
You: YOU attempt to walk EAST but the WEREWOLF. Stands in your way. He requests you answer a RIDDLE. What do you do?
Stranger: TALK to Werewolf
You: He tells you the riddle. "What happens when a vampire bites a werewolf?"
You: Upon further inspection, this is not a RIDDLE.
Stranger: ANSWER: "Stephanie Meyers makes another shitty saga out of it and drains the pre-pubescent children of the world of their money."
You: The WEREWOLF applauds you. "You may pass." The WEREWOLF steps out of your way. What do you do now?
Stranger: Walk NORTH
You: You head NORTH, avoiding dangerous traps. You come across a MANPIG. Upon further inspection, this is a fanfic author. You are equipped with a SWORD OF FLAMEWAR. What do you do?
Stranger: Use CAPSLOCK
You: You hit the CAPSLOCK BUTTON. WHAT NOW.
Stranger: USE RAGE
You: YOU TYPE A LONG SUMMARY ON WHY THE MANPIG SUCKS. HE REPLIES WITH "tl:dr". WHAT DO YOU DO?
Stranger: Post TUBGIRL
You: THE FANFIC AUTHOR REALIZES HIS LIFE WAS A DAMN WASTE. HE LEAVES, AND HANGS HIMSELF THE FOLLOWING MORNING. WHAT DO YOU DO NOW?
Stranger: Use POST PICS, FAGGOT REMARK
You: YOU POST PICS, AND TYPE A SEEMINGLY WITTY REMARK. YOU APPLAUD YOURSELF ON YOUR CLEVERNESS AND CONTINUE ON YOUR WAY. WHAT DO YOU DO NOW?
Stranger: Walk to OMEGLE
You: YOU ENTER THE CORRIDOR OF OMEGLE. THE CORRIDOR IS FILLED WITH PERVERTS, TROLLS, AND UNDERAGE CHILDREN. YOU ARE STILL EQUIPPED WITH SWORD OF FLAMEWAR. WHAT DO YOU DO?
Stranger: TROLL THE FUCK OUT OF ANOTHER PERSON WHO TAKES PLEASURE IN PRESENTING ROLEPLAYING GAMES TO RANDOM STRANGERS
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I do wonder if he thought he was trolling me. Oh well.

 

[The Meme]

Omegle: The best way to kill time.

 

[Lucas₇₅₅]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: heyy
You: heyy
Stranger: do you wear diapers?
You: do you wear diapers?
Stranger: yea i do
Stranger: do u?
You: that depends.
You: GET IT?
Stranger: hahaha
You: DEPENDS.
Stranger: yeaa i got it
You: OHOHOHOH.
Stranger: good one lol
You: I KNOW.
You: I'm only good for one joke a night, though.
Stranger: hahaha
You: You're free to stay for riveting conversation though.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

People nowadays just don't appreciate good conversation.

 

[Not Meowth]

Stranger: it kills me not to know this but ive all but just forgotten what the color of her eyes were and her scars or how she got them
You: They're greenish-mauve
You: There's a scar on her face in the shape of an owl
You: She got it when an owl flew into her face
Stranger: thankyou
Stranger: ♥
You: No problem.
You: Watch out for owls.
Stranger: i will
You have disconnected.

You: I CHALLENGE YOU TO A POKEMON BATTLE
Stranger: i chose you requasa!
You: I PLAY BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGON IN ATTACK MODE
You: THEN I USE MY POLYMERISATION CARD TO- wait
You: fuck
You have disconnected.

pfft blue eyes ultimate dragon could take rayquaza any day :l

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hi, I'm 23 and a girl. Believe it.
You: Don't be ridiculous. 23-year-olds are a myth.
Stranger: As are girls on the internet, at least from my understanding.
You: Or at least horny girls on Omegle. Not that I seek them.
Stranger: Pfft. Don't lie. You do.
You: Okay, I do. When trolling.
You: Any horny people will do for that.
Stranger: The aroused are quite open about being victimized.
You: Or, if they are aroused Brits, victimised.
Stranger: Oh, those silly horny Brits.
You: I know. Them and their... horny tea.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: 18 m looking for horny f
Stranger: It's your lucky day 18 f USA and very horny
You: nice
Stranger: Yep
Stranger: What are you wearing?
You: a hat
Stranger: Haha anything else?
You: no
Stranger: Im wearing a bra and lacy thong
You: no hat?
Stranger: Hahaha no I can get one though haha
You: what kinds of hat do you have?
Stranger: Feduras and baseball hats
You: put a fedora on
Stranger: Ok. Hold on...
You: not as fancy as my deerstalker but it'll do
Stranger: Ok I'm wearing my hat
You: good
Stranger: Soooo
You: actually i don't like fedoras.
You have disconnected.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hi.
Stranger: looking for a horny female ;) what u wanna do? phone sex, cyber sex or trade naked pics?
You: Hi
Stranger: hi
You: H
Stranger: looking for a horny female ;) what u wanna do? phone sex, cyber sex or trade naked pics?
You:
You: What makes you not understand that you haven't found one?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: hey
You: asl?
Stranger: fine, no hi.
Stranger: 15 f usa
You: Usa?
You: where is that?
Stranger: united states of america
You: never heard of it.
You: is it, like, really small?
Stranger: really? south of canada. north of mexico
You: oh, in africa

You: I CHALLENGE YOU TO A POKEMON BATTLE
Stranger: hi im a 16 year old boy looking to chat with a hot older man
You: Wild PERVERT appeared!
You: Go, CHARIZARD!
Stranger: well do u wana see my cok or not?
You: What will PERVERT do?
You: [Attack/Bag/Pokemon/Run]
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: hello
Stranger: hi
Stranger: asl?
You: sorry my england speaks not so happy
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: b
You: c
Stranger: d
You: e
Stranger: f
You: g
Stranger: h
You: i
Stranger: j
You: k
Stranger: l
You: m
Stranger: n
You: o
Stranger: p
You: q
Stranger: r
You: s
Stranger: t
You: u
Stranger: v
You: w
Stranger: x
You: y
Stranger: z
You: Now I know my ABCs
Stranger: well infact you missed "A" out so no you dont
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

...how am I the one who missed out A? >:c

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: I'm Dmitriy Mendeleyev
Stranger: asl
Stranger: im adkjsahdjkas asdhjskdhak
You: 103/m/Russia
Stranger: mhmm
Stranger: im sure old man
You: No wait I meant 174
Stranger: ok good im 173
You: I was counting from my death date. Silly me.
Stranger: sooo....real age
You: 71. You don't age after death.
Stranger: u not 71
You: Prove it, bitch.
Stranger: dead people dont use the word bithc
Stranger: bitch**
You: I don't have to tke this from you. i invented the Periodic Table, mother fucker.
You have disconnected.

Stranger: excuse me sir, have you seen my hat?
You: it's on your head, old bean
Stranger: it blew out of the window
Stranger: and
Stranger: well surely
Stranger: by golly.
Stranger: you're right
Stranger: it's been here all along!
You: oh, you old rascal, Mortimer!
Stranger: well
Stranger: if you'll excuse me I have an appiontment
Stranger: with Mr Sherlock Holmes of Baker Street
Stranger: you see I've lost my hat...
You: oh dear! well awfully good luck finding it
Stranger: thankyou old chap
Stranger: have a cigar
Stranger: the next train to London leaves in twenty minutes.
You: mmm, delicious. *eats cigar*
Stranger: wonderful
You: why, we're on the next train to London, Sidney
Stranger: this, cannot be!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: hey
You: Herro
Stranger: asl
You: I here for practice my Engrish
You: I hope we have happy fun time

You: Do you know the joke they don't tell stupid people?
Stranger: no
You: lol
You have disconnected.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: Hi.
Stranger: whats up?
You: The opposite of down.
Stranger: ahhhh that makes sense now
You: It does.
Stranger: well I'm bored
You: Same.
Stranger: yup
Stranger: so anything exciting to talk about?
You: EXPLOSIONS.
Stranger: EXPLOSIONS ARE AMAZING!!!!
Stranger: I'm watching mythbusters as we speak
You: KABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHKK
You: I love that show.
Stranger: its just full of explosions
You: Explosions and Jamie's mustache.
Stranger: haha yup
You: And his hat. Don't forget his hat.
Stranger: haha
Stranger: that beret
You: I want it.
You: I'm going to steal it all ninja-like before he blows me up.
Stranger: they sell them at the Army surplus store
Stranger: hahahaha
You: NO. I WANT JAMIE'S
You: Adam will help me take it
Stranger: Adam would only do it out of jealousy hahaha
You: Yes.
Stranger: he wears a fedora
Stranger: psh
Stranger: fedora
You: He envies Jamie's hat and his own lack of hat.
You: Fedoras are cool. But not as cool as berets you can apparently never remove.
Stranger: mmhmm
Stranger: but unless you're an archeologist or a mythbuster when you wear a fedora now a days it means you're a dancer
Stranger: and I ain't no dancer
You: Then I'll loot you Adam's t-shirt.
You: The one that says "I reject your reality and substitute my own".
Stranger: hahahaha
You: Oh, and Buster.
Stranger: I love that shirt
Stranger: BUSTER!!!!!
You: I want Buster's babies.
You: Even though I'm a man and he's inanimate.
You: We'LL MAKE IT WORK
Stranger: hahaha yes
Stranger: I know you can do it
You: Thanks bud
Stranger: only the best
You: You always believed in me :')
Stranger: I always will
You: I love you man.
You: /woman.
Stranger: hahahaha
Stranger: I'm a man/boy/thing
You: I love you, manboything.
Stranger: no it needs the dashes other wise its just weird
You: You can be mine and Buster's kids' uncle.
Stranger: YAY!!!
Stranger: but not the creepy uncle
You: No, not him.
Stranger: the one with the short shorts
Stranger: ewwwww
You: The awesome uncle with the nice t-shirt, that's who you will be.
Stranger: YES!!!!
You: I almost said t-shit by mistake.
Stranger: I always wanted to be that uncle
You: The t-shitting uncle?
You: Dude.
You: Not cool.
Stranger: no the shirt one
Stranger: hahaha
You: Oh, him.
You: Thst's cool.
Stranger: I was distracted by mythbuster
You: -s.
Stranger: mmhmm
You: Did they blow something up?
Stranger: yes
You: FUCK YEAH
Stranger: they are trying to make popcorn with an explosion !!!!
You: Those fucking legends.
Stranger: mmhmm
You: You know what?
Stranger: only mythbusters and rednecks
You: Screw the myths.
You: We need a show with just Adam and Jamie blowing shit up for an hour.
Stranger: hahahaha
You: Maybe the junior Mystbusters too.
Stranger: hahahaha those guys are funny
You: I might orgasm watching such a show.
You: I ALMOST SAID SHOE.
You: Me and my crazy typoes.
Stranger: hahaha
You: That sexy, sexy shoe
Stranger: that would be a powerful show to make someone with your stamina orgasm in just an hour
You: Adam and Jamie blowing shit up non-stop doesn't sound powerful to you?
Stranger: well it does but not orgasm power
You: :c
You: Are you saying sex is better than Mythbusters?
Stranger: only sometimes
You: Really? Huh, I should try it.
Stranger: but sex and mythbusters is amazin beyond compare
You: I'm this close to imagining the Mythbusters having sex oh god oh god nop
You: *no
Stranger: hahahaha
Stranger: Jamie and Adam... ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
You: FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCKKKKKK no
Stranger: hahaha they could all gang bang that poor asain
You: stop saying these things before i tear my spleen out
You: and eat it
Stranger: hahaha
Stranger: that poor. poor asian
You: RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIPPPPPPP.
Stranger: gang banged by a fedora and a beret
You: Okay seriously screw you
You have disconnected.

 

[Tyranitar freak]

Not sure how funny it is, but I laughed.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Derp
You: HELP, I'M STUCK IN A WELL!
Stranger: lol
Stranger: funny
Stranger: computer in there?
You: Funny. I figured you would disconnect.
You: Did you dosconnect?
Stranger: i guess no
Stranger: typing what!?
You: FILLER FILLER FILLER. Odd silence
You: Holy shit, the lord is speaking to me. Something about burritos.
Stranger: i like burrito
Stranger: lol
You: I'll type first
Stranger: but u really seems like freaked
You: No, not freaked, except some dude keeps stareing at me, *Glances out window.
You: Please help.
Stranger: not funny
Stranger: i'll go
Stranger: bye
Stranger: call 911
You: I've tried, but the phone is eating cheeseburgers!
Your conversational partner has disconnected

This one was funny to

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hello
Stranger: hey
Stranger: m/f??
You: M
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Loved this one

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi asl
You: Hey, 600/m/Jupiter
Stranger: fag
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hai
You: Hello. Last three guys I got were weird, you?
Stranger: GAY?
Your conversational partner has disconnected

This dude was just awesome

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hi
Stranger: Hiii :d
You: You're not going to ask for cybersex, right?
Stranger: lol, nooo :o im not one of they freaky guyss :d
Stranger: im just bored & come on this too chat really :Dx
You: Phew, 'cause I'm a dude, and I don't like dissapointing people. I'm just waiting for something funny to happen.
Stranger: You Do Get Some Pretty Fucked Up People On Thos Dont Uu :)) lol
Stranger: This**
You: Yes, of course once, when I told a guy I was male once, he just logged off.
Stranger: They All Do That :)), Ur Punctuation Is Perfect :O
You: Yeah, I've always done that for some reason. It's like a tame form of OCD.
You: I mean my punctuation.
Stranger: Haha, Its Not A Bad Thing But :O Im Impressed :d
You: On the other end does it say I'm the stranger?
Stranger: Yeahh :O
You: Weird, I never thought of myself as a stranger.
You: I mean, I know myself so well.
Stranger: :))
You: Is the second one a chin?
Stranger: Noooo :O Its A Laffing Face On Yahoo :$
You: Ah, I don't use Yahoo.
Stranger: its quite shitty really ;O
You: The commercials for the engine are weird, I always see them, "This is the new one with a pimp!"
You: Well, I guess Yahoo is better than Ask.com
You: Still there?
You: Echoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
You: Well, I gotta roll, see ya.
You have disconnected.

I hope to meet this stranger again on that site one day.

 

[Cinders]

Stranger: geeze
You: so i herd u lik mudkipz?
Stranger: er,yeah, what ever that is
You: Oh well. So why the geeze?
Stranger: coz I is a geezer and it is short for that
Stranger: what is mudkipz?
You: Oh, I see.
You: Mudkipz are small, first-stage, imaginary mudfish with super powers.
Stranger: ok
Stranger: and are u a chick that mimics their powers?
You: I'm afraid not. Just an avid fan of such creatures.
Stranger: cool
Stranger: well, keep fanning yourself
Stranger: adios amigos

Stranger: hey
You: I have a secret mission for you, Agent 651TR.
Stranger: ok
Stranger: wat is it
You: You must first take travel to Area 51.
You: There, you will be met by aliens in disguise.
You: to keep them from killing you, you must say the password.
You: Which is "Always drink your ovaltine"
You: Then, you will be taken to their leader.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: hi
You: Are you ready for your mission, Agent 56R?
Stranger: sure
You: You must get off of this site, and proceed out the doors of the building you are currently in, and start having a life.
Stranger: thats a low blow
You: It is your mission, 56R. Dare you deny it?
Stranger: it was just unnecicary
You: You dissapoint me, 56R.
Stranger: i know i spelled it wrong
You: Well then, continue living out your miserable exsistance all alone with no spell check and no friends.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: kiss me
You: Hello, boys on the internet!
Stranger: girl here
You: Whoopsie.
You: And I'd rather not.
Stranger: yeah, I'm not gay.
You: Me neither! What a coincidence!
Stranger: lol
You: No, seriously. I think we must be destined to be great friends.
You: Perhaps long lost twins?
Stranger: there's lots of straight people,
You: But there's only one you!
Stranger: true,
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: I CHALLENGE YOU TO A POKEMON BATTLE!
Stranger: YOU'RE GOING DOWN!
You: GO! CHARIZARD!
Stranger: GANGER, I CHOOSE YOU!!
Stranger: USE YOUR SHADOW BALL!
You: CHARIZARD LOST 30 HP
You: CHARIZARD USED FIRE BLAST!
Stranger: GANGER TRIED TO DOGDE, BUT LOST $) HP!
Stranger: 40 my bad
Stranger: USE HYPNOSIS!
You: CHARIZARD FELL ASLEEP!
You: CHARIZARD, COME BACK!
You: GO! MEWTWO1
Stranger: fuck
You: MEWTWO USED SUPERMEGAAWESOMEKICKASS ATTACK1
You: GENGAR FAINTED!
Stranger: no he's dead
You: My bad..
Stranger: MEWTWO KILLED A GHOST!
You: They do that sometimes.
Stranger: COME BACK....IF YOU CAN
Stranger: no?
Stranger: OK GO LUCARIO
You: MEWTWO USED THUNDER!
Stranger: LUCARIO DODGED CAUSE HE'S FAST AS SHIT
Stranger: USE DOUBLE TEAM!
You: MEWTWO FAINTED FROM THE SHOCK OF NOT HITTING!
You: it's never actually lost before..
Stranger: lucario you can stop running you won
Stranger: spa
Stranger: z
Stranger: good battle sir
Stranger: how old are you?
You: Why thank you, although I am not a sir.
Stranger: O-O
You: ?
Stranger: surprised face how old are you then
Stranger: mam
Stranger: madam sounds a bit better
You: yes, girls know pokemon, too :)
You: And do not feel the need to disclose, sorry.
Stranger: im 17 and pokemon kick ass
Stranger: i dont have cards or other stuff
Stranger: i got 1 gameboy game
You: well... 15, and it most certainly does. I just play the games.
Stranger: i got sapphire
You: Lessee.... Ruby, Pinball, LeafGreen, Channel, Colloseum, Dash, Ranger 2, Blue mystery dungeon, platinum, pearl, heartgold.
Stranger: yeah idk where it is though
You: Yeah. I don't always have much of a life.
Stranger: it's more amazing that you remembered them all rather never mind the sheer number
Stranger: of the quantaty of the games
You: hahaha, I am asked to list them pretty often.
Stranger: gotchya
You: yessir.
Stranger: well im saving this conversation to show that pokemon isnt dead
You: hahaha, I was actually planning on posting it to the pokemon forum I'm at.
Stranger: and that me and 4 of my friends watching 5 hours of pokemon movies on a cruise ship is fucking justified
You: it most certainly is!
Stranger: and beautiful
You: i mean, what else would you watch?
Stranger: PEOPLE OF RANDOM POKEMON FORUM. I AM RICK, FRIENDS CALL ME RICO, AND I SUPPORT YOU. ALSO I WON THIS BATTLE.
Stranger: im out :)
You: okay.
You: wait!
Stranger: k
You: lemme give you the forum url.
Stranger: kk
You: you can find it posted and see.
Stranger: kk
You: http://forums.dragonflycave.com/showthread.php?t=7048&page=15
You: it'll be on this page in a second.
You: Okay. Thank you for the battle, Rick/Rico.
You: :)

Yes, thank you Rico. I really hope you see this :D And if you ever bother to register, let me know.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: :O <==3
You: Happy Cow Appreciation Day.
Stranger: fuck horses
Stranger: who gives a shit about kentucky
You: Preceisley.
Stranger: i luv u
Stranger: BITCH!
You: Gee. Thanks.
You: Good video :D
Stranger: ur welcome lets hav surprise butt sux
Stranger: sex
You: No thanks. That's what cows are for.
Stranger: fuc cows they hav 3 vaginas
You: As far as I know, there's one. Five stomachs, though.
Stranger: 3 penises + 3 vaginas = 1fatass baby cow
You: I would once again like to state that that is anatomically incorrect and highly improbable.
You: Feel free to prove me wrong.
You: Really.
You: No one ever does.
Stranger: ok sux cow penis
You: I think you meant to type that as "Ok. *sucks cow penis*"
You: In which case, that is not advisable, sir.
You: Please refrain from doing that.

 

[Missile]

BRB DYING.

My God, these are side-hurting. I can't breathe, at all. The Rick/Rico thing was awesome, just purely awesome. Now, I need to see a conversation where two TCoD Members meet up and post the exact same thing on this Thread while having negative comments about each other, only to find out they've befriended each other. That's a must-see for me.

Anyways, I'm going to go try it and I'll try to have a sense of humor.

 

[Rai-CH]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: hi
Stranger: heyyyy
Stranger: asl
You: 15/m/Antarctica
Stranger: cool 14 f florida usa
You: what's it like there?
Stranger: very hot
You: thats cool
You: Antarctica gets boring at times, there's only penguins to talk to :(
Stranger: lol :)
Stranger: do you have a email
You: No, I don't even have a computer
You: I'm at my friends house
Stranger: cool is he there with you
You: Not at the moment, he's busy with his brother
You: If you know what I mean...
Stranger: ohhh i hate brothers i have a little one hes an ass
You: That must suck
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: is antartica a country or just a no mans land
You: It's a country all right
You: not many people come there though, just the scientists
You: they're pretty cool
Stranger: yea do you have a set currency
You: Yea we pay eachother with penguin poop
You: not exactly the finest currency out there but whatever
Stranger: haha thats cute
Stranger: are you a vergin ...penguins dont count
You: Well obviously, those scientists aren't the horniest guys around
Stranger: so yoour gay
You: No, there are female scientists around XD
Stranger: ok whatever u say does your freind have an email
You: I don't think so, I've never asked him
You: Maybe if you ever find him on Omegle he'll tell you!
Stranger: well ill give you my older brothersand i can kep in touch if he has one
You: But I don't have a computer to E-mail you D:
Stranger: well use your freinds
You: I don't think he'd like that
You: he's scary when he's angry
You: once he kicked me in the face because I accidentally downloaded tojans on his computer
Stranger: tell your freind and ill send pictures and stuff
You: I thought I was special because I was the 1,000,000th visitor to a website D:
Stranger: trojans nasty buggers
You: Ikr
You: It took weeks for his computer to be fixed
Stranger: your a dumbass allpopups and adds are crap
You: I didn't know though!
You: It was my first time using a computer!
You: I just wanted to use google D:
Stranger: yea it happens wel just in case [[E-mail removed]] my names makayla
You: Well thanks, but we probably won't be able to keep in touch
You: I have such a busy schedual, you know?
You: Those penguins just can't feed themselves anymore!
You: I'll try to talk to you again one day! :D
Stranger: yea your a bab liar i know you dont live in ant artica and its not acountry but you sound cute so keep the email
You: I really do live in Antarctica!
You: I've been there as long as I can remember, just hanging out with my buddy Douglas the penguin~
Stranger: ok whatever email me if you can ive got nude pics;)
You: Dude you're fourteen wtf are you doing with nude pics
You: I don't even have a girlfriend yet
Stranger: im AMERICAN !!!!
You: I know someone from America, he's a bit scatterbrained with a huge hero complex, but overall he's a nice guy
You: As far as I know he has nude pics
You: I hope...
You: *has no
You: WTF IM SCARING MYSELF D: D: D:
Stranger: your in a desprit sitch
You: *sobs*
You: Well I have to go now, my friend wants to use the computer
You: bye! :)
You have disconnected.

and that is what happens when I try to RP as one of my OCs O__o I ended up going so out of character, but whatever it was fun.

 

[Teh Ebil Snorlax]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
Stranger: male 23 here looking for friend
You: THE NUMBER 23
You have disconnected

 

[Not Meowth]

You: Hi.
Stranger: [WARNING: Omegle™ is required under United States Federal Law to inform you that the IP (98.179.227.210) of the person whom you are chatting with is linked to a registered sex offender. Omegle™ encourages you to consider this when giving out personal information. The stranger cannot see this message.]
Stranger: Hi!
You: Fail.
Stranger: I know right?
Stranger: So, are you a /b/rother?
Stranger: Or just a interfag?
You: I have a shocking thory. Maybe the "official Omegle messages don't say Stranger:" were planted there by rapists.
You: Interfag.
Stranger: Interesting.
You: *"official Omegle messages don't say Stranger:" messages
You: They're trying to put us in a sense of false security, man.
Stranger: I think halo is a pretty cool guy. eh kills aleins and DOSENT AFRAID OF ANYTHING
You: ANYTHING?
You: Wow he dosent afraid of much.
Stranger: Yeah, i remember when this meme was spammed by all the newfags.
Stranger: Kinda like how Milhouse was a forced meme.
You: Milhouse is not a meme, but "Milhouse is not a meme" is a meme.
You: :o
Stranger: True words.
Stranger: Maybe the /b/tards haven't figured it out.
You: Though it has become a meme about seven times in those "if this post ends in [number] Milhouse is a meme" threads. I've seen the screenshots.
Stranger: Meh, it's controversial.
You: Everybody knows reality is governed by random Interwebs people.
Stranger: Like that time when BOXAY fucked us all to hell.
Stranger: Newfags vs oldfags and boxxy lovers vs boxxy haters
You: She is not trolling. She is Boxxy, you see.
You: *^_^ face*
Stranger: It was hilarious to me because she didn't even know what the hell 4chan or /b/ was.
Stranger: Yet she was the most uber meme ever spawned.
You: I still don't quite get who she even was. as far as I can tell she just rambled a lot on YouTube videos.
Stranger: Yeah.
Stranger: That was the basic idea.
You: Oh. Fool that I am, I thought it was more complex.
Stranger: Until her dad got pissed off and made that video of her crying and crap.
Stranger: She need a BAWWWW-bulance.
Stranger: So then /b/ just tripped it's balls on her and now it's a freaking meme.
You: Ah.
You: Still, it's worth it to see a human being actually make a face that looks like ^_^.
Stranger: Yeah...
Stranger: Well, ED has an article on her explaining the story.
Stranger: ==++++++++++++++++++I$7III+???+++++++++++++++++++++===================~=~~==~~~~~:::::::::::::::~~~~
====+++++++++++?I$8ZO8OZ$7$$++??++++++++++++++++++================~~~~=~~~~~~~~~:::::::::::::~~~~~~~
=====++++++++Z$O$ZOOOO88OI77???++??I777II??+++++++=================~~~~~~~~~~~:::::::::::::~~~~~~~~~
=====+++++O7$7OZO8O7++?7N8$IZ7+I777IIIIIIIIII777?==================~~~~==~~~~::::::::::~~~:~~~~~~~~~
=======+Z$$ZOOZ=++++++++?NII77III7III?IIIIIIIIIIII7+====================~~~~~::::::::::::::~~~~~~~~~
======Z$IZZZO==+++++++++7IIII7I7IIII?????IIIII?I?IIII7=================~~~~~~:::::::::::::~~~~~=~~~~
~~====+Z8?OO+====+++++++IIIII77III??????????????????II?7+==============~::::::::::::::~~~~~~~===~===
=======ND8N+======+++$IIII7777IIIIII????????????++++++??II======~~~===~~::::::::::::~~~~~~~~========
========DZM=======++Z?777$$7IIIIIIIIII?I?+??????+++++=++?III==~~~~~~~~~~:::::::::::~~~~~~~~=========
~~~================Z7I7$$$77I7IIIIII????????????++++=====+???~~~~~~~~:~:::::::::::~~~~~~~~~=========
~~~~~~============Z$777$$$777IIIIIIII???????+???+++++=====+?II=:~~~~~~~~~~::::~~~~~~~~~~~~~========+
~~~~~~~~~~========Z$$7$$$$$777IIIIIII????????++++++++======+?II=~~~~~~~~::::::~~~~~~~===~~====++++++
~~~~~~~~~~~~=~====ZZZ$$$$$$777IIIIIII?????++?+++??++++======+?II?~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~=======++++++++
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~=~=+ZZZZ$$$$$7$77IIIIII??????+???++?++++======???II+~~~~~~~~~~~~~~=~==~~===+++++++++++
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~==ZZZ$$$$$$$$7777III????????????++?++++=====++?II7~~=~~~~~~~~~~========+++++++++++++
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ZZZ$$$$$$$$$$77IIIII???????????+??+++++=====+?II7=====~~~=~~=========+++++++++????
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~=O$Z$$$$$$$$$$$77777I????????????????+++======?II7?===================+++=+++++++++
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~===OZZ$$$$$Z$$$$77IIII?????????????????+====~==+?I77=====================+++++++++++
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~=~=+OOZ$$Z$$$$$77II7III?????????????????+====???I77===============++++++++++++++++
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:::::::::::::~Z777777$77????I??????I777Z8D888OOOZZZZZ77I?78O7I?III8+DZ=~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~::::,.:::::::
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ZODDO8O?~~~~:~,:=7ZI$$?+~:~~+Z$$Z$==??$Z$$7777$7$$$$7$$$Z7777777777$D$$IZ$$$OZZZZ7+$I$ZZ$$$77$$7$$7$
Stranger: ASCII FAIL
You: ASCII always fails on Omegle D:
Stranger: Lol
You:
======[[:]]====[[:]]==
==[[]]==[[:]]===[[:]]===
Stranger: | \
_| \______________________________________
- ______ ________________ \_`,
-(_______ JEWS -= DID -= WTC )
`--------=============----------------`

You: We'll have to make do with this car chase.
Stranger: Meh, kinda close.
You: ><> And a fish.
Stranger: g
o / \ \ / \ o
a| | \ | | a
t| `. | | : t
s` | | \| | s
e \ | / / \\\ --__ \\ : e
x \ \/ _--~~ ~--__| \ | x
* \ \_-~ ~-_\ | *
g \_ \ _.--------.______\| | g
o \ \______// _ ___ _ (_(__> \ | o
a \ . C ___) ______ (_(____> | / a
t /\ | C ____)/ \ (_____> |_/ t
s / /\| C_____) | (___> / \ s
e | ( _C_____)\______/ // _/ / \ e
x | \ |__ \\_________// (__/ | x
* | \ \____) `---- --' | *
g | \_ ___\ /_ _/ | g
o | / | | \ | o
a | | / \ \ | a
t | / / | | \ |t
s | / / \__/\___/ | |s
e | / | | | |e
x | | | | | |x
Stranger: Failed goatse.
Stranger: Holy shit omegle fails.
You: At ASCII.
Stranger: Well, I gotta go troll some more inter-rookies.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I think that first ASCII was some kind of caterpillar.

You: I am a bomb technician. There is an explosive device attached to your computer. You must do exactly as I say or it will detonate, blowing you to smithereens.
Stranger: what do you want me to do ;)
You: Quack like a duck.
Stranger: fuck off lol
You: I must ask you to cooperate with me to defuse this dangerous device, or your life could be at risk.
Stranger: quack lol
You: Okay, that should do it.
Stranger: really i would have done a lot more ;)
You: No, I just want to disarm explosives and make the world a safer place.
Stranger: so your a good guy
You: Yup. There are very few evil bomb technicians.
Stranger: i like em bad
You: Well I could go blow something up if you like.
Stranger: ill do the blowing around here
You: That would be inadvisable without the correct training and safety equipment.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Typed from memory because the log seems to have deleted itself.

 

[nastypass]

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Wild Entei appears!
Stranger: awesome
Stranger: i just shit myself
You: Wild Entei has fled!
You have disconnected.

 

[Not Meowth]

hey everyone
this guy says omegle is a waste of time, we'd better all go adopt kids

 

[Zora of Termina]

hey everyone
this guy says omegle is a waste of time, we'd better all go adopt kids

Yeah, that's all well and good... except for the part where I don't give a flying fuck about the rest of real-world humanity and just wanna dick around with strangers on the internet.

LIKE SO:

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.

You: Oh HELL.

You: I've really done it this time.

You: First, I lose a valuable member of my organization and now... this.

Stranger: Oh no!

You: Yes, it sucks.

Stranger: I know

Stranger: i lost my secetary Janet - i really wanted her to stay

Stranger: :(

You: I sent a prized member of my organization to kill a little girl and he decided to leave, and now I've found out the woman I raped is pregnant with a child I don't want.

Stranger: God dammit. things always happen to us!

You: I know, right!

Stranger: The other day i stole a laptop that didn't even work without a charger - So i went back to ask for one, then they shouted at me. The have a cheek

You: They certainly do.

You: Well, I'm off to make my babymomma's nephew turn into blood and explode and ruin his girlfriend's life. Taa~

Stranger: Bye - wish me luck, tomorrow i am going to blow up an airport. Wish me luck! :D

You have disconnected.

 

[Not Meowth]

Yeah, that's all well and good... except for the part where I don't give a flying fuck about the rest of real-world humanity and just wanna dick around with strangers on the internet.

And the fact that there's no way on earth I'd trust 99% of the people on Omegle with a kid even if it weren't a fucking stupid alternative to going on a chatroom.

ANYWAY

You: Hi.
Stranger: hi horny male 17 usa;)
You: I'VE GOT A WILLY AS WELL
You: HE LIKES YOU
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Read me a story Mr Penguin
Stranger: ok
You: YAAAAAAAY
Stranger: whats
You: STORY TIME
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

the fuck is my story bitch

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: Official messages from Omegle will always be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Greyed-out messages claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

AND NOW THE MOST WASTE-OF-TIME CONVO EVER HELD ANYWHERE with slightly ripped-off opening line.

You: Hello Mr Penguin.
Stranger: Mr. Leopard Seal................................we meet again
You: Yes. You will not get away this time, I promise you.
You: We will duel to the death at tic-tac-toe.
Stranger: indeed we will
Stranger: whoever wins will eat the loser
You: But penguins eat mostly fish and a little popcorn.
You: Leopard seals are mammals.
Stranger: indeed, but i'm not regular penguin
You: Are you a fifty-foot electric penguin?
Stranger: indeed i am
You: Oh shit.
You: Shit fuck shitty shite bother.
Stranger: tic tac toe to the death?
You: NO. I WILL BRING YOU DOWN WITH MY ESKIMO ARMY.
Stranger: godzilla is on his way
You: SHIT
Stranger: either run.....................................or die
You: I THOUGHT HE WAS HOPPIN' AROUND TOKYO CITY LIKE A BIG PLAYGROUND!
Stranger: WHEN SUDDENLY BATMAN BURST FROM THE SHADE AND HIT GODZILLA WITH A BATGRENADE
You: GODZILLA GOT PISSED AND BEGAN TO ATTACK, BUT DIDN'T EXPECT TO BE BLOCKED BY SHA
You: *SHAQ
Stranger: WHO PROCEEDED TO OPEN A CAN OF SHAQ FU WHEN AARON CARTER CAME OUT OF THE BLUE
You: AND HE STARTED BEATING UP SHAQUILLE O'NEAL, THEN THEY BOTH GOT FLATTENED BY THE BATMOBILE
Stranger: BUT BEFORE IT COULD MAKE IT BACK TO THE BATCAVE, ABRAHAM LINCOLN POPPED OUT OF HIS GRAVE
You: AND PULLED AN AK47 FROM UNDER HIS HAT AND BLEW BATMAN AWAY WITH A RAT A TAT TAT
Stranger: HE RAN OUT OF BULLETS AND HE RAN AWAY WHEN OPTIMUS PRIME CAME TO SAVE THE DAY
You: THIS IS THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN OF ULTIMATE DESTINY
Stranger: GOOD GUYS, BAD GUYS AND EXPLOSIONS (AS FAR AS THE EYE CAN SEE)
You: AND ONLY ONE WILL SURVIVE, I WONDER WHO IT WILL BE?
Stranger: THIS IS THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN (OF ULTIMATE DESTINY)
You: GODZILLA TOOK A BITE OUT OF OPTIMUS PRIME LIKE SCRUFF MCGRUFF TOOK A BITE OUT OF CRIME
Stranger: THEN SHAQ CAME BACK COVERED IN A TIRE TRACK
Stranger: BUT JACKIE CHAN JUMPED OUT AND LANDED ON HIS BACK
You: AND BATMAN WAS INJURED AND TRYING TO GET STEADY WHEN ABRAHAM LINCOLN CAME BACK WITH A MACHETE
Stranger: BUT SUDDENLY SOMETHING CAUGHT HIS LEG AND HE TRIPPED, INDIANA JONES TOOK HIM OUT WITH HIS WHIP
You: THEN HE SAW GODZILLA SNEAKING UP FROM BEHIND AND HE REACHED FOR HIS GUN WHICH HE JUST COULDN'T FIND
Stranger: 'CAUSE BATMAN STOLE IT AND HE SHOT AND HE MISSED, AND JACKIE CHAN DEFLECTED IT WITH HIS FIST
You: AND HE JUMPED IN THE AIR AND DID A SOMERSAULT WHILE ABRAHAM LINCOLN TRIED TO POLEVAULT
Stranger: ONTO OPTIMUS PRIME, BUT THEY COLLIDED IN THE AIR THEY BOTH GOT HIT BY A CARE BEAR STARE
You: THIS IS THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN OF ULTIMATE DESTINY
Stranger: GOOD GUYS, BAD GUYS, AND EXPLOSIONS (AS FAR AS THE EYE CAN SEE)
You: AND ONLY ONE WILL SURVIVE, I WONDER WHO IT WILL BE?
Stranger: THIS IS THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN
You: ANGELS SANG OUT... IN IMMACULATE CHORUS
Stranger: DOWN FROM THE HEAVENS, DESCENDED CHUCK NORRIS
You: WHO DELIVERED A KICK WHICH COULD SHATTER BONES
Stranger: INTO THE CROTCH OF INDIANA JONES
You: WHO FELL ON THE GROUND WRITHING IN PAIN
Stranger: AS BATMAN CHANGED BACK, INTO BRUCE WAYNE
You: BUT CHUCK SAW THROUGH THIS CLEVER DISGUISE
Stranger: AND CRUSHED BATMAN'S HEAD, IN BETWEEN HIS THIGHS
You: THEN GANDALF THE GREY AND GANDALF THE WHITE AND MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL'S BLACK KNIGHT
Stranger: BENITO MUSSOLINI, AND THE BLUE MEANIE AND COWBOY CURTIS AND JAMBI THE GENIE
You: ROBOCOP, THE TERMINATOR, CAPTAIN KIRK AND DARTH VADER, LO PAN, SUPERMAN, EVERY SINGLE POWER RANGER
Stranger: BILL S. PRESTON AND THEODORE LOGAN, SPOCK, THE ROCK, DOC OCK AND HULK HOGAN
You: ALL CAME OUT OF NOWHERE LIGHTNING FAST AND KICKED CHUCK NORRIS IN HIS COWBOY ASS
Stranger: IT WAS THE BLOODIEST BATTLE THE WORLD HAS EVER SAW WITH CIVILIANS LOOKING IN TOTAL AWE
You: THE FIGHT RAGED ON FOR A CENTURY, MANY LIVES WERE CLAIMED BUT EVENTUALLY
Stranger: THE CHAMPION STOOD, AND THE REST SAW THEIR BETTER: MR ROGERS IN A BLOOD STAINED SWEATER
You: THIS IS THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN OF ULTIMATE DESTINY
Stranger: GOOD GUYS, BAD GUYS AND EXPLOSIONS (AS FAR AS THE EYE CAN SEE)
You: AND ONLY ONE WILL SURVIVE, I WONDER WHO IT WILL BE?
Stranger: THIS IS THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN
You: THIS IS THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN
Stranger: THIS IS THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN
You: THIS IS THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN
Stranger: THIS IS THE ULTIMATE SHOWDOWN
You: OF ULTIMATE DESTINY.
Stranger: hahahaha, this shit was genious
You: I think I love you.
Stranger: haha, m or f?
You: M.
Stranger: dammit
Stranger: same
Stranger: :(
Stranger: oh well
Stranger: you can love this girl!
You: Which?
Stranger: http://iupload.info/files/1/IMG_0041.jpg
Stranger: this one
Stranger: :P
You: Oh, the one every guy pretending to be a girl on here has a picture of. :)
Stranger: haha
Stranger: she's still hot
Stranger: admit it
You: I wonder what that spray down there on the sink is.
Stranger: it's not mine, some other person gave it to me :P
Stranger: it'd be awesome of her t-shirt was wet
You: But that would be cold and uncomfortable for her.
Stranger: she could take it off
You: She'd probably have a wet torso too, so she'd still be pretty cold.
Stranger: there's a shower back there dude
You: I see only a door and a towel rail.
Stranger: shit
Stranger: well, she's still in a bathroom
You: So she is.
You: You'd think there'd be a towel on that rail.
Stranger: yeah
You: How is one meant to dry oneself?
Stranger: the air :P
You: That'd take ages.
You: Or she could keep changing t-shirt until they soak up all the moisture.
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: oooooooor she could just get a new towel
You: Or if that's an iPhone maybe she has a towel app.
Stranger: hahahahaha
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: maybe
Stranger: maybe a drier app
You: Basically anything that'd do the job.
Stranger: haha yeah
You: But then you can only see a portion of the rail.
You: There may be a towel after all.
Stranger: yeah! :D
You: And then all our ranting would be for nothing. :D
Stranger: yep! all our ranting is futile and she's still hot
You: Well, I must be on my way. It's been fun talking to you about Arctic wildlife, the Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny, and how a random girl with not many clothes off might dry herself.
You: ...clothes on.
You: Oh god.
Stranger: oh god what?
You: I dunno. saying "clothes off" instead sounds weird somehow.
You: Some sort of Freudian slit.
You: Er, slip.
Stranger: hahahahaha, she's hot
Stranger: clothes off of her would be awesome
You: If you say so.
You: Anyway, good night sir.
Stranger: i do
Stranger: you too man
Stranger: c ya
You have disconnected.

 

[Vladimir Lenin's Tweets]

One time, I told some creep to go find a Dodo bird, and he said. "I won't let you down!"

 

[Lucas₇₅₅]

...Wait a second.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Wild Entei appears!
Stranger: awesome
Stranger: i just shit myself
You: Wild Entei has fled!
You have disconnected.

Walker, was this you?

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
Stranger: A wild Entei appeared!
You: Wild ABRA appeared!
You: No way.
You: I can't believe I foound entei.
Stranger: Entei used Flamethrower!
You: DODGE
You: MEAN LOOK
Stranger: Entei used Flamethrower!
You: Abra took damage!
You: Hypnosis!
Stranger: Entei falls asleep!
Stranger: Entei is fast asleep
You: FALSE SWIPE SPAM
Stranger: Entei woke up!
You: OH SHI
Stranger: Entei used Roar!
Stranger: But it failed
You: YESSSSS
You: UH
You: HYPNOSIS AGAIN.
Stranger: Entei falls asleep!
You: FALSE SWIPE SPAM
Stranger: Entei fainted!
You: WUT
You: FALSE SWIPE DOES NOT KILL
You: YOU HACK
Stranger: ACTION REPLAY
You: HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
You have disconnected.