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1000 Things To Do In Walmart (or a big store)

914: Have a loud "conversation" on the phone (something like... "Hey. You got em? Good. I really needed some. *pause* You did WHAT last night?!?!?!"

913: Whenever someone is on the phone, yell "PUT YOUR PANTS BACK ON!" loudly.

912: Go up to the clerk and say you lost your parents. (funnier if you are over 13) If they actually believe you and ask for parents names, give them nonsense names.

911: Stand by the cake department. Whenever someone is looking at a cake, yell "THE CAKE IS A LIE!!!!!"

910: Act like a cat/dog/etc. If someone asks if you need help, scream "WHO ARE YOU, MY MOTHER?!?!" then get up and walk away.

909: Superglue items to the shelves and watch people try to get them off (bonus points if they make noises like they're constipated)

908: Buy an apple (or other fruit) then stand by the door and proceed to suck the juice out of it. If anyone asks what you're doing, say "I'm a vegetarian vampire."

907: Go into the bathroom and lock all unoccupied stalls.

906: Pour ketchup all over yourself and scream "BLOODY MURDER" (these are starting to get retarded)

905: If there is an iten in the store priced $9001vor up, ask a worker what the price is. After they tall you, gasp, then yell "ITS OVER 9000!!!!"

904: Get a worker and go down the isles asking the prices.

903: Run through the store screaming something like "RAPE!"

902: Go up to a random person and shake their hand, then say "CONGRATULATIONS!" You've just won... ONE PENNY!" then hand them a penny and walk away.

901: Throw fake coins and/or dollar bills in the air and scream "ITS RAINING MONEYZ!!!"

900: Stand in the middle of the store, sobbing and screaming "I WANT MY MOMMIE!"

899: (woo i made it) Ask random people to help you find your cat.

898: Turn all of the "TRY ME" toys on.

Oh yeah; I'm good =P
 
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897) Grab someone by their shirt saying "WHERE DID YOU PUT MAH MONEYZ YOU (Insert swear here)"

896) Go up to random people and ask "Have you met my Fiance?"
 
895: Open bottles of milk and throw them around, then cry over it.
894: Go up to random people and say "hi, I'm <insert famous or fictional name here>".
893: Randomly spazz over video games you see, and then hug the box.
 
891: Wander around aimlessly with your eyes closed.
For some reason I'm finding it insanely funny o.o
 
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890. Buy a can of beans and a small barbecue, then camp out in the camping section. Bonus points if someone comes to inspect the tent you're living in.

889. Hang a 'Try Me!' sign around your neck and cut a hole in your shirt about the bellybutton area, then go hide in the little kids' toy section. If someone pokes you go "Hahaha, that tickles!" in the best Elmo impersonation you can.

888. Switch the labels on all canned products.

887. Switch the price tag on the most expensive piece of jewllery you can find with the price tag of some candy. Bonus points if someone buys the jewllery.

886. Roast marshmallows in the barbecue section.

885. Use a lock pick and unlock all the cages in the pet section.

884. Swap something in the jewllery section with candy jewllery.

883. Hang a younger sibling on a coathanger and put a sign saying 'Free to any good home' around their neck.

882. Give the accountant $16 at gunpoint.
 
881) Go up to a cashier and say something along the lines of, "Would you please direct me to your Twinkies?" and, if possible, raise an eyebrow.
 
880) Run around the pet food isle meowing the Meow Mix theme song.

879) Shake a bag of meow mix singing Dr. Evil's meow mix song. (I want chicken, I want liver, Meow Mix, Meow Mix please deliver!)

878) Go up to a worker and drop something saying. "Oh, can you pick that up please?" Then when you get it back, throw it back down saying "Oh, dropped it." and repeat.

877) Get some paintball guns and have a war. Bonus points if you shoot the manager.
 
((
ZuZu said:
1000: Hide in a clothes rack and when someone comes to you yell "PICK ME! PICK ME!!!"
Click to expand...
))

((I've done that before to my mum :O It scared her.))

880: Grab a baseball bat and attack random passersby shouting that a zombie apocalypse has begun and theres only enough food and baseball merchandise for you.
 
Blackthorne Steele said:
983: Go to any person of the opposite sex and say, *whistle* "Someone's looking sexeh tonight... woof!" (Or meow... or whatever else you can think of.)
Click to expand...

Me and my friend went in a walmart before and had a contest over who could say it to the most girls. Oh and we had to scream. Lol, that was funny as hell.

Me: *whistles* who is that foxy lady?
Old Lady: *acts offended* and walks away as fast as possible
My friend: *whistle* I'll see you in bed tonight

Yeah, it was hilarious, till a worker told us to leave...

879: Grab a group of friends and pick up toy swords from the toy section and run around, screaming, "For my cat! Auuuugh!"
 
875: enter, peruse the merchandise and either make a number of purchases or leave the premises with nary a single item.
 
brandman1996 said:
Me and my friend went in a walmart before and had a contest over who could say it to the most girls. Oh and we had to scream. Lol, that was funny as hell.

Me: *whistles* who is that foxy lady?
Old Lady: *acts offended* and walks away as fast as possible
My friend: *whistle* I'll see you in bed tonight
Click to expand...

I'll have to get a couple of my friends and have a contest too! Oh, god. I can only imagine what we could say... It's hilarious you were asked to leave. XD

874) Assert yourself to the middle of a large crowd (Days with a sale work well.) and fall to the ground screaming "NOOOOOO! NOT THE SEIZURES AGAIN!!! WHY!!!!!
 
873: Spend a long time sitting someplace where lots of women pass by, lugging around a scrap of paper asking them to love you, which you call "Attraction Sign".

... Anyone recognize this?
 
872: Start crying randomly and demand a refund for something you didn't even buy.

871: Run in, grab as much spinach as you can, and run out saying Popeye needs it urgently.

870: Throw a fridge over and say "Go Rotom!"
 
869: Get oon a riding lawnmower and chase customers around.

868: Fill water baloons with ketchup and throw them at people. Bonus points for knocking down an old lady.
 
867: Shop as you normally would, but go naked.
866: Stare at some random person for a few seconds, then say, "YOU'RE ONE OF THEM!!" and go cower in a corner until they leave. *Bonus points if they try to convince you to go to the other side*
 
Bombsii said:
871: Run in, grab as much spinach as you can, and run out saying Popeye needs it urgently.
Click to expand...

What do you with the spinach if this works?

862: Stare furiously at the opposite sex's underwear. If someone asks you what you're doing, you reply that you're shopping for more underwear.

861: If any of the signs at said store say "Volleyballs" or "Volleyball", replace said signs with signs saying "Willsons" or "Willson".

860: Direct all black people to wherever basketballs are, and tell them "It's okay, you're in your natural environment now!". Proceed to run.
 
859: Buy something ridiculously cheap (cost wise), then go to the returns counter and demand a refund because it was "defective".
 
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