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Ask Altmer Anything

Will you tell me your fantasies?

I'd tell you my fantasies but I don't really think you want to know. They don't involve wild sex or magic, they are really fucking boring in fact :(

Who's the best Dutch person ever.

Best Dutch person ever?.... Wow, many good candidates for that one. I'm going to go with Anne Frank. I really don't give a shit about many historical figures so it might be a random scientist (Huygens, Spinoza). I think Anne Frank sums up my favourite person way more than any politician or so could.

Why do meringues taste so good? *eats another*

Because you're psychologically inclined to like them.
 
What is the strangest dream you've ever had?

There's been a bunch, but a guy being slaughtered by two other people with butcher knives definitely counts as strange. There's been quite a few sexual ones, also stuff where I've been chased by Nazgul and big black dogs.
 
why are we here on this earth?
and no saying because there is nowhere else human life is sustainable.
weeeellllll?
 
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What was that song that began with birds tweeting and had ocean waves?

Anathema - Temporary Peace? There are so many songs that do that. Have you got a specific band in mind?

Why did we find out my best friend had swine flu after we'd all played her trumpet at my birthday party?

Because viruses are tiny. And because you suck.

Why does my arm turn bright red and shake violently while I'm eating dirt?

Because you masturbate while doing it.

Why do I randomly explode?

Because you're a walking time bomb.

What is a bandwagon?

A wagon that holds concerts. It's a BAND WAGON get it.

why are we here on this earth?
and no saying because there is nowhere else human life is sustainable.
weeeellllll?

You don't want to hear the answer I'm going to give, so why would you ask this question? Regardless of that, not because anyone put us here. I'd wager a good bit of luck and the least hostile environment. And of course, because our parents fucked.

am i sleepy?

Like a Snorlax.

Should I move out? :c

yes
 
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