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The Hate Machine

Bluberry Bat

Mostly Ghostly
The Hate Machine
♠♠♠♠♠♠

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Some people just have no holiday spirit, you figure; love certainly isn't in the air around this little booth in the secluded areas of the shadier parts of the Safari Zone boardwalk. This sickly green-looking booth looks to have just opened, a less-than-enthusiastic girl in her late teens leaning back in her chair, eyeing you with indifference. There's a pitch black laptop sporting a Meowth sticker on her small desk, an a surprisingly perky Riolu on her lap. Dark green curtains hang open in front of a booth that could only look gloomier with some blood stains and cobwebs.

As you approach, however, she gets herself begrudgingly upright, laying hands on the desk and flipping her curled, messy looking hair out of her eyes, which have bags under them suggesting she hasn't slept in eons.

"Oiya, looking to try your luck? Well don't look at me, thing's automated. I'm a formality, let's be honest." She chimes, and with that, she leans back down, tossing her feet up onto the desk and jostling the excitable Riolu somewhat, who was been eyeing you happily this whole time. You manage to catch a glimpse of a name tag, though, 'Sable'.

You don't have the time to say anything before she waves her arm in a mocking manner, motioning towards the open booth, and pulling her Riolu closer proceeds to stroke its head. You may as well step inside, though you're not sure what good could come of this...

Inside is fairly simple, featuring a large lever which looks rather jammed up and hard to pull, a small display screen, a circular slot, and a money intake. The stool inside creaks as you sit on it as if it will barely hold your weight. It smells vaguely of patchouli...

"By the way, I'm not liable if any of them try to nip you-" You hear from outside just as the curtains slam shut.. as much as curtains can slam, anyway.

How awkward...

------------------------------

No date? Not feeling the valentines spirit? Just pop £5 into the slot, pull the lever hard, and you'll receive a Pokémon or item! It's that simple. Just uh.. be careful, some of them might bite...

♠♠♠
 
Awww, the Hate Machine needs some love...
*slaps down $5 and goes in wearing full-body armour*

(You are aware that there are two hate machines?)
 
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(You are aware that there are two hate machines?)
(Quite aware, the forum had a spaz attack just as I was posting this last night. The other thread is glitched, empty, and as such I can't seem to get rid of it, so hopefully a mod will get my message to cleaning it up soon.)



Eonrider~

Looks as if you're the first victi- ahem.. participant, let's see how it goes~
Inside the booth, you grasp the handle and give it a hard tug... huh.. jammed good, seems like it hasn't been used in awhile... You grab it with both hands and proceed to try to dislodge it with all your strength and-
oomf! You fall backwards as the lever gives way, and the small booth lights up as the viewscreen illuminates to display a rather unpleasant message of 'You're going to die alone' alongside a rather.. mocking, Awesome!Face. A Pokéball pops out of the slot haphazardly, landing on your lap, before bursting open and.. Holy cr-

huntail (Male)

It looks as if you've been awarded a rather miffed fishy, and a what a mug on this guy. Congratulations?


Green~

The booth looks a bit damp and hastily abandoned.. hmm. Oh well, nothing to do but go for it. Tugging on the lever, it eventually gives way to your efforts, screen lighting up to display a broken heart, alongside the message; 'There's plenty more fish in the sea, too bad they all contain mercury.'
A Pokéball then rolls out of the small slot, and bursting open you find...

snubbull (Male)

...Aaw, he's not that bad. At very least it doesn't look like he can competently attack you. Just keep your fingers away from those jaws, better safe..


Dr Frank~

You see others leaving this small booth looking a little disturbed for wear. Mockingly scoffing, you step inside, well this is simple enough. You give the lever a yank, and.. the screen remains blank. Huh, is this thing broken or what- but you notice something else, the 'Jaws' theme has started playing over crackling speakers from within the booth. What's all this, then? A Pokéball rolls out, and...

Sharpedo (Female)

Is that a freakin' shark? Suddenly the booth has an aromatic vibe more akin to 'Evil Seafood', and you quickly exit to avoid having your face violently eaten.


blazheirio889~

It smells like evil fish in here.. Propping up the small bench, you can't help but notice dents and marks throughout the inside of the booth, like something has been thrashing about.. Odd. Still, this is the place for you of course~ Confident, you pop £10 into the slot. A small '2' lights up on screen, and you give the lever a pull. A sun with an angry face bursts into existence, scowling and pulsing alongside the words 'Icarus thought he could fly, too'. Well what's that supposed to mean? Frowning, you catch the dispensed Pokéball, which abruptly bursts open as if to its own will, revealing-

bagon

D'aww.. she's pretty cute, actually.. At least, until she takes a nip at your fingers. Huh.. I'm sure she's just a bit scared. After a bit of a struggle in which the small discontent dragon attempts to climb out of the booth using your head as a springboard, you manage to get her back into the Pokeball, and rubbing your hands together give it another go. With another pull of the lever, the booth whirs and screen lights up reading 'Famous Last Words'.
What? You exclaim, before covering your mouth realising what you've done. A Pokéball pops out.. is it really a good idea to open this?.. Too late, it opens itself, and-

carvanha

((Seriously what's up with the evil seafood RNG)) You dash out of the booth, a flopping piranha snapping its jaws menacingly at you. Uhm.. good thing she has no water to move in. Man, this booth is messed up...


Blastoise~

What's there, a fish market next door? No matter.. You give the lever a tug.. it gives a bit of resistance, maybe there's some seaweed jammed in there or something. The screen lights up a flashing purple and green (Ow your eyes) and displays 'They can't all be winners - and most aren't' before clunking an oddly shaped stone through the receptacle. Frowning, you pick up your 'prize'. Seriously? You -literally- got a rock? Well, not quite-

spiritomb (Male)

Suddenly, a purple and green aura bursts from the small keystone. Quickly dropping it to the ground, startled, you find yourself face to face with an ethereal face of a hundred accursed souls.. how... pleasant. If nothing else, he isn't trying to bite you, so you take it for what its worth.
(Lucky you, that's a 1 in 100 chance prize~ )


Cookies~

Before you can even enter the booth, you're taken aback as you receive a Riolu glomp to the face - the booth keeper giving a sharp whistle calling her pup back. Well that was... odd. Ahem, you slowly step inside. The booth feels pretty eerie, how strange.. sitting down, you gather your wits and give the lever a sharp pull. The screen lights up in a variety of colours, and reads 'Unicorns Vomiting Rainbows' alongside a visual representation of said... activity. Uuh...
A Pokéball falls into your lap, and bursting open it reveals -

yanma (Female)

The awkwardly kipper dragonfly quickly perches on your head, which is somewhat a relief given the warnings of bites. As you step out of the booth, however, you're attacked a second time via glomp from the booth keeper. Uhuh...


Verne~

YEAYUZ. Stepping into the booth confidently, you give the lever a MANLY tug, which it feels as if its threatening to snap right off. The screen proceeds to light up a rather... un-MANLY pink, displaying a huffing and puffing Blissey dancing alongside bouncy hearts in a three-step cheapo animation, alongside text reading 'About as manly as a Blissey'. What the hell-
Before you can really respond, though, a small capsule rolls from to machine.. this isn't a Pokéball, what gives-
As you crack it open, a congealed, dark purple muck spills onto your hands. Quickly snapping the capsule shut again, you proceed to swear. Best uh, go wash your hands off...

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(Item: Black Sludge)
 
I'll take a spin. Anything anti-Valentine's is awesome.
(note: my friend is breaking up with someone then. i approve muchly.)
 
EvilCrazyMonkey~

Is that goop on the ground? What kind of business are they running.. oh well, it's better than the Pink!Beam of a love tester, valentines sucks, and you know it. Giving the lever a powerful crank, the screen lights up, displaying the rather awkward 'Because you touch yourself at night'. What does that have to do with anything-
Before long, you're dispensed a Pokéball. Normal, and innocent enough looking.. right?

bagon (Male)

Oh geez it's a dragon.. a very small dragon. Seems like his girlfriend may be missing, to boot, and he's more than happy to try to nip some extremities off. Careful, he's small but those things are razor bloody sharp. Ouch.


Dybael~

It's danger you want? It's danger you got~ Fearlessly, you dive into the booth, allow it to haphazardly eat your money, and give the lever a pull. The screen flashes a putrid green reading 'You smell of week old cheese left out in the sun' before spitting out a Pokéball you could swear smells just the part.-

gloom (Female)

As the ball bursts open, suddenly the booth is overtaken by a chokingly thick stench. A drooling plant, bobbing back and forth, looks at you innocently, her arm rubbing her cheek. At least she isn't biting, but dear gods if that doesn't reek...
 
FullMetalCookies~

:3 Chuuuuu~
...In a display that is likely making the other customers rather ill ((But they can suck it 8D )) you delve again into the great beyond~ In goes money, out comes... huh? A few sparks fly out of the receptacle, before a... giant purple rat slides out. He's gnawing on a bundle of wires, and eyes you cutely..... you thought you saw the booth keeper with a steak knife, though.

rattata (Male)

Oh, er.. dammit, those things are always getting in there... uh..... well, my steak knife got clipped.. but you could have what's left of my lunch of you want. Unless you'd rather keep him...

Choice Time!
rattata or
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?~


RandomTyphoon~

Aw yeeeeah! You can feel the hatred! And rest assured our rat problems have been taken care of.... for now. Entering the booth, you give the lever it's trademark tug. The screen flares up like a nova, reading 'SPARKLE.' ...what? Thing must still be a bit glitchy. Also ow your eyes. And.... is something crawling out of this thi- HOLY CRAP A SPIDER

ariados (Male)

Oh.. it must have gotten out when the place was getting the chew down. He looks pretty relieved to be free, though.
 
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