The LGBT Club

[Lorem Ipsum]

so... I came out to my parents yesterday. And they were fine with it. <3

 

[opaltiger]

Oh christ, I have the same thing. And it's not just with people I'm attracted to - every so often I'll be around someone (male or female) I am sure is gay and I'll feel like we have a ~special gay bond~ and then suddenly one day they mention their opposite-sex partner or whatever in passing and I feel utterly crushed and betrayed and they have absolutely no idea and I'm inwardly wailing "but how could you, random guy in my cultures of embodiment class? ;;"

But my inability to identify gay people coupled with the fact that basically nobody is gay (or if they are, they're men) really sucks. I am apparently the only lesbian in the uni's feminist society, which has like 30 women in. Whoever said that every stereotype is based in truth lied so hard.

In a sort of related concept, I keep forgetting sexualities exist. I've just... stopped thinking in terms of them. I'm not gay or straight. I don't think those words are very good descriptions of anyone, really.

But of course, very few people think this way. It's a bit problematic.

 

[Flazeah]

Gah. I'm confused. Started thinking I might be bi rather than gay. Went to uni thinking I was gay, and until this week, was perfectly happy... gah. Thinking again that I might be bi, but I might just be very confused. I'm kind of struggling with feelings for a male friend of mine, wondering whether I just really care about him platonically or if it's something else.

...Did I mention gah? Just gah. Just to complicate things a bit more, I have a crush on someone else - a female - I've told him I'm gay, and this is pretty weird for me; I'm not used to thinking of friends this way. He told me yesterday he's bi and somehow I guessed who he likes correctly. It's a guy we both barely know who's ridiculously pretty.

Uh. Yeah. Sorry for that ramble. Felt good to get it out.

opaltiger, I often think that's a very useful way of thinking. Sometimes I wonder how many people really want to think like this but don't because they think it's easier to use terms like gay and straight. But then I figure that the terms are still useful for them because they honestly feel that they're only attracted to a certain gender or whatever. As for myself, I use the terms, but again, I definitely think your way of thinking is a good one, and despite the fact that I use the terms, I think I could get into this way of thinking. Meh.

 

[Minish]

In a sort of related concept, I keep forgetting sexualities exist. I've just... stopped thinking in terms of them. I'm not gay or straight. I don't think those words are very good descriptions of anyone, really.

But of course, very few people think this way. It's a bit problematic.

Oh, don't worry, I'm exactly the same way. I kind of get irritated whenever I'm reminded sexualities do exist. It's odd getting reminded that I'm bisexual/lesbian/whatever, because it's genuinely just something I never ever think of. I think of myself as belonging to the LGBT community, but only because I'm interested in gay rights and such. :/

It makes it a lot harder when I get abuse shouted at me constantly in the street every day. ): Well, when I say abuse, it's mainly people yelling "LESBIAN!" at me and my girlfriend, in massive, intimidating groups, or occasionally making obscene remarks.

It's... actually getting really annoying. Really, really annoying. The other day we got stalked all the way across town to the station by a group of snotty-nosed girls who apparently found it very interesting that we are such "lesbians". Amusingly, my own year at school doesn't give us that much hassle. We're just constantly followed and yelled at in town by everyone else, and everywhere I go at school I hear whispers of "it's that lesbian, don't go near her" and such like.

I don't like it. ):

 

[baiyune]

so... I came out to my parents yesterday. And they were fine with it. <3

Yay! *cheers* It's kinda reassuring that more and more parents seem to be accepting their kids. Of course, there are still lots of horrible cases, but ... It's getting better.

Amusingly, my own year at school doesn't give us that much hassle. We're just constantly followed and yelled at in town by everyone else, and everywhere I go at school I hear whispers of "it's that lesbian, don't go near her" and such like.

I don't like it. ):

Ugh, that sounds awful. :( My girlfriend and I don't usually get too much trouble for it (it's an all girl's school, you're hard pressed to find a girl that doesn't at least act like she's gay, and my year in particular are all over each other) but there's one girl at school that makes snide remarks whenever she sees us holding hands. It doesn't help (or maybe it does, I don't know) that we're technically not out yet.

Regarding the sexualities thing ... I call myself lesbian because I have only ever been attracted to girls and that's the word for it, but then again I'm only sixteen, so who knows what'll happen in the future?

 

[Harlequin]

Oh, don't worry, I'm exactly the same way. I kind of get irritated whenever I'm reminded sexualities do exist. It's odd getting reminded that I'm bisexual/lesbian/whatever, because it's genuinely just something I never ever think of. I think of myself as belonging to the LGBT community, but only because I'm interested in gay rights and such. :/

See, I don't even think of myself as a member of the LGBT community. I'm sort of just shuffling along just being a man who happens to like other men. I don't see it as a particularly large part of my identity, and whenever someone mentions it I'm like "... oh right yeah I'm gay, there's a whole thing about that isn't there?"

I mean, it's a perfectly good and descriptive label for me and what I like, but I don't really think in those terms. I'm mostly just "lalalala oh look an attractive man. lalala oh look a new episode of Weeds. lalala oh a sandwich." It's just one trait of many.

 

[opaltiger]

But then I figure that the terms are still useful for them because they honestly feel that they're only attracted to a certain gender or whatever.

At the risk of seeming presumptuous, I would venture to say that people might feel they're attracted to a certain gender precisely because they're so used to thinking in sexualities. It's either "gay", "straight", or "bi". Three points; nothing in between. So, unless you are attracted to boys and girls equally, you have to be either gay or straight. It's very polarising.

It's odd getting reminded that I'm bisexual/lesbian/whatever

I know, right? Usually, for convenience' sake, I will say I'm straight, but that's just because I figure most people don't want to be drawn into a discussion about this sort of thing in casual conversation.

It makes it a lot harder when I get abuse shouted at me constantly in the street every day. ): Well, when I say abuse, it's mainly people yelling "LESBIAN!" at me and my girlfriend, in massive, intimidating groups, or occasionally making obscene remarks.

It's... actually getting really annoying. Really, really annoying. The other day we got stalked all the way across town to the station by a group of snotty-nosed girls who apparently found it very interesting that we are such "lesbians". Amusingly, my own year at school doesn't give us that much hassle. We're just constantly followed and yelled at in town by everyone else, and everywhere I go at school I hear whispers of "it's that lesbian, don't go near her" and such like.

I don't like it. ):

*hugs*

 

[...]

In a sort of related concept, I keep forgetting sexualities exist. I've just... stopped thinking in terms of them. I'm not gay or straight. I don't think those words are very good descriptions of anyone, really.

But of course, very few people think this way. It's a bit problematic.

I must be part of that very few.

And you know, people never actually started using the term "straight" to label people until "gay" became a widely-used term, as (usually vulgar) slang for homosexual. Now look at what's become of that. :/

Oh, don't worry, I'm exactly the same way. I kind of get irritated whenever I'm reminded sexualities do exist. It's odd getting reminded that I'm bisexual/lesbian/whatever, because it's genuinely just something I never ever think of. I think of myself as belonging to the LGBT community, but only because I'm interested in gay rights and such. :/

It makes it a lot harder when I get abuse shouted at me constantly in the street every day. ): Well, when I say abuse, it's mainly people yelling "LESBIAN!" at me and my girlfriend, in massive, intimidating groups, or occasionally making obscene remarks.

It's... actually getting really annoying. Really, really annoying. The other day we got stalked all the way across town to the station by a group of snotty-nosed girls who apparently found it very interesting that we are such "lesbians". Amusingly, my own year at school doesn't give us that much hassle. We're just constantly followed and yelled at in town by everyone else, and everywhere I go at school I hear whispers of "it's that lesbian, don't go near her" and such like.

I don't like it. ):

I can sympathise. I was walking through an outdoor mall a couple of months ago and caught sight of two young women holding hands, not making any effort to conceal that they were, in fact, in a relationship. In the two or so seconds I was within earshot of their vicinity, I heard at least one vulgar insult directed at them. Were it not for the fact that I was with my (homophobic) family at the time, I would have said something. But I know how you're feeling.

See, I don't even think of myself as a member of the LGBT community. I'm sort of just shuffling along just being a man who happens to like other men. I don't see it as a particularly large part of my identity, and whenever someone mentions it I'm like "... oh right yeah I'm gay, there's a whole thing about that isn't there?"

I mean, it's a perfectly good and descriptive label for me and what I like, but I don't really think in those terms. I'm mostly just "lalalala oh look an attractive man. lalala oh look a new episode of Weeds. lalala oh a sandwich." It's just one trait of many.

All the members of the TCoD LGBT Club must telepathically connected. This is exactly how I feel.

 

[Diz]

All the members of the TCoD LGBT Club must telepathically connected. This is exactly how I feel.

I'm pretty sure that's how ALL LGBTQ people feel :/

Also, my school is possibly the most homoerotic place ever. All the guys are all over each other, and girls are also a little all over girls, and nobody ever has any problem with it. It kinda makes them all hypocritical when they don't accept anyone who is actually gay.

 

[Jolty]

Oh, don't worry, I'm exactly the same way. I kind of get irritated whenever I'm reminded sexualities do exist. It's odd getting reminded that I'm bisexual/lesbian/whatever, because it's genuinely just something I never ever think of. I think of myself as belonging to the LGBT community, but only because I'm interested in gay rights and such. :/

Haha I must be the only one here that's the other way around, I'm forever aware that I'm not straight and sometimes I'll be like "I bet everyone else here is straight" or something because I think too much about shit.

Just to be confusing though, I don't think of myself or any of my friends as having a specific sexuality lmao. We just like whoever. No idea why I don't see randomers and everyone else like that...

 

[Dannichu]

It makes it a lot harder when I get abuse shouted at me constantly in the street every day. ): Well, when I say abuse, it's mainly people yelling "LESBIAN!" at me and my girlfriend, in massive, intimidating groups, or occasionally making obscene remarks.

That's really awful ): And, in my experience, pretty unusual. I hold hands and act couple-y with lots of my female friends and I haven't had anything like that in ages. Over the summer, my sister and I were in Nottingham and were holding hands and got talking to a guy on the street who was collecting for some wildlife charity and he told us what an adorable couple we were until we set him straight (so to speak) and he was hilariously embarassed. My friend and I were shopping together at Sainsbury's and bickering about reusable bags or something and the girl serving us said we were acting like her and her boyfriend. And few things are more amusing than getting approving looks from old people on buses when they think you and your same-sex friend are together.
Maybe it just gets better as you get older?

 

[Nope]

I'm going to set my "interested in" to "Male, Female" on Facebook. To be honest, I think everyone will be okay with it. The only person I know /in the world/ whom I think might be homophobic is my grandma. And she doesn't use technology.

Haha, it's kind of like coming out, except I'm not shouting it out loud or put it as my status, I'm just letting people stumble on it themselves. :B

BUT EITHER WAY wish me luck

 

[opaltiger]

I hold hands and act couple-y with lots of my female friends and I haven't had anything like that in ages. Over the summer, my sister and I were in Nottingham and were holding hands and got talking to a guy on the street who was collecting for some wildlife charity and he told us what an adorable couple we were until we set him straight (so to speak) and he was hilariously embarassed.

My sister and I get mistaken for a couple a lot, too. :P Especially now that we don't look as obviously related as we used to.

But yeah, in general I don't get the "holding hands = couple" mentality. I walk arm-in-arm with lots of my friends!

 

[...]

I'm going to set my "interested in" to "Male, Female" on Facebook. To be honest, I think everyone will be okay with it. The only person I know /in the world/ whom I think might be homophobic is my grandma. And she doesn't use technology.

Haha, it's kind of like coming out, except I'm not shouting it out loud or put it as my status, I'm just letting people stumble on it themselves. :B

BUT EITHER WAY wish me luck

I seriously contemplated doing this as I was setting up my account, but most of my relatives (And my mom and dad, to boot) are avid Facebookers and very apt to check the Info page. And they're as homophobic as it gets aside from being like Islamic or something. :/ Good luck and I hope it turns out well.

 

[opaltiger]

What the FUCK? What possible message could this send other than "we want to execute gays but we can't :("?

 

[...]

I fail to see how executing LGBT folks would solve problems.

 

[Zuu]

In a sort of related concept, I keep forgetting sexualities exist. I've just... stopped thinking in terms of them. I'm not gay or straight. I don't think those words are very good descriptions of anyone, really.

But of course, very few people think this way. It's a bit problematic.

precisely this. it's very terrible.

also, i changed my Facebook preferences to Male, Female a while ago and no one said anything. i have no idea if anyone even knows.

 

[Harlequin]

I fail to see how executing LGBT folks would solve problems.

you'd have no more gays/the gays you have would be too afraid to say anything therefore you wouldn't have to give gays rights or anything and everyone shuts up about it

 

[...]

you'd have no more gays/the gays you have would be too afraid to say anything therefore you wouldn't have to give gays rights or anything and everyone shuts up about it

Trufax, but then you're left with furious straight supporters. So what, do they want to execute straight folks too? Or is that option left to us LGBT people?

 

[Harlequin]

Trufax, but then you're left with furious straight supporters. So what, do they want to execute straight folks too? Or is that option left to us LGBT people?

I don't think they're thinking that far ahead. It's more of a "let's just kill all the gays" situation.