Bonsai Story Tree!

[Dragon_night]

Okay, I've decided to bring this one back (although, I'm pretty sure it was here like last time >_>)

For those of you who don't know what the Bonsai Story Tree is, look here --> http://www.critters.org/bonsai.html

The instructions are pretty easy to follow. Just post in a part of your fic or writing, and watch the insanity come out. Then, post the highlights here :3

Here's one, from the small bit before the prologue in my fic Tesseract.

Our planet, Earth, as you read non-stop.
Almost two other pages Give or two.
Which is something I would like to read with very, very very small writing.
Such a sentient planet, of that, if you read with out Humans don’t rule the second planet to contain life on it It is their story.
Their diminutive piece of that, if you were to look inside the era you are all Earths history could be written into a hundred.
If all Earths history could be one thousand, four hundred pages.
Give or take a page for each million years Now, if you read the pages containing humans.
The era of that, if you were to read with out stopping.
That is the second planet to point out.
Humans don’t rule the pages containing humans, you were to look inside the book, you would find two other pages containing humans.
The first… Well, this is the era of Pokémon trainers and gyms.
The first… Well, this is the power those life forms have.
If one had enough of that, if you were to look inside the book, you would find two other pages containing humans, you call it.
It is it is a sentient planet, of page… Our planet, Earth, as you are all Earths history could be written ...​

XD

And a bunch of bits from the actual prologue. Only the highlights (warning, immature with lots of sexual references >_>):

‘I know what I know what I have our own out to the ground in waves, and there, all its weight.

Wut?

‘I know what I have to care.

For what? Me?

Three golden claws stamping the immense noise, her legs, the sentence again repeated and speed of the EDP.

Uh, that could be taken the wrong way...

which will to live in waves, and over again in her by mere inches.

0.0 Well, I didn't think the thing could make my fic into a porno.

Many ran chaotically.

NOOOOO!

She could feel each leg.

Yep. Porno.

And her their large claws stamping the leader with a long enough to the Vulpix.

What did I just say!

’I know what I know what I have known you have a Metagross’s leg fell on hybrid1/1000, useless.

It makes sense, but I can't figure it out.

She gave a large hole through The bloody Vulpix

O gawd, the images!

We don’t want if you are right about the size of the fist use on it.

I swear, I could sell this as a porno.

To accomplish this, we We already won or will never win.

Again, wut?

‘I know what I know what I have known you have a rock about the size of armor to drag her a smile for her ruby red eyes reflecting the procedure will have our own out to the leader, its self from the weight and speed as the Council.

... Don't make me start.

A small wind erupted from her.

FFFAARRTT!!!

She looked behind him flickered on the chair, flexing its body.
She could feel each leg.

Do I have to say it?

Psychic video did nothing but themselves.

There's a word for that, Psychic video.

Psychic video did receive enough energy to disturb its comrades.

Poor Psychic Video, first humiliated, now not getting enough attention :3

They were too close for any possible comfort.

OH GAWD!



So yeah, post your highlight!

 

[Shiny Grimer]

Dragon_night, I'd like to say that babelfish'd/bonsai'd text often ends up sounding like that: very suggestive if your head's in the gutter. But then again, you go to TCoD. We all have our heads in the gutter. :-P

From the revision of 'Under Attack', my '06 NaNo novel:

“Y’all are crazy. What you on, with this stupid Mario story? It’s all stupid, like yo’ head. Man, it make no sense. Mario di’nt not do all dat stuff. Mr. Pasta just has his friends do all dat stuff fo’ him. Yeah, he was coo’ once, but now he’s a fat-“ the following word makes the teachers herd the children away from the crowd and onto a conveniently placed school bus, “- that just take credit fo’ what his friends do. Mario had friends, and y’all are jacking me up bad if you say that,“ choice word, “di’ all that crap by ‘imself.”

Although I have problems understanding what he says, I like how he stands up for Mario’s partners. It’s true that we don’t get much credit, but I never think about it. He had been the one who started the adventure, so it seems natural to me that Mario gets the most recognition.

The bomb is flustered. “I am sorry; I did not mean to discredit Mario’s comrades, but Mario is very well-known, and I don’t know names of friends-“

“Who cares?” shouts a shrill voice. A short person with a mushroom-like growth on her head approaches the guide. “Last time I checked, the play was called ‘Paper Mario’, not ‘Paper Mario and Company’. Mario started the whole thing, so who cares what insignificant specks tagged along?”

That one outburst somehow causes all the conspiracy theorists in the crowd to yell out their thoughts.

“Mario never had any friends with him!”
“The Shadow Queen’s Rise never happened!”
“Mario is a construct of the government and none of his adventures are true!”

I love Bonsai'd text. Much better than babelfish, though that is fun, too.

“Y’all are jacking me that Mario gets the whole thing, so who cares shouts a conveniently placed school bus, “- that choice word, “di’ all that crap by ‘imself.” Although I did not mean to yell out their thoughts.

A convenintely placed school bus shouts about caring whether Mario gets the whole thing, says a choice words, and then says he didn't mean to yell out 'their' thoughts.

“Mario never had any friends with him!” “The Shadow Queen’s Rise never happened!” “Mario is flustered.
“I am sorry; I like how he says, I never think about it.

Mario is flustered? What? And why does the school bus say he likes how he says 'I never think about it'?

He had friends, and onto a mushroom- like how he stands up bad if you say that,“ choice word, “di’ all the conspiracy theorists in the guide.

He had friends and climbs onto a mushroom. He stans up bad if you say a choice word, and does all the conspiracy theorists in the guide. Woah.

“Last time I like how he was coo’ once, but Mario is very well-known, and none of his adventures are jacking me that Mario is a mushroom- like yo’ head.

XD

Pasta just take credit but I am sorry; I don’t know names of the government and y’all are crazy.


What are these 'names of the government' you speak of?

“Y’all are jacking me up bad if you on, with ...

He said my name! And someone's jacking him up bad? o_O

 

[Terry. T.]

Wrong place. This is SPAM and I am going to report you. And, you've overquoted everything.

 

[Phoenixsong]

...It's not spam, dude. It's something fun to do with a story you've written that isn't actually posting the story. Therefore, it belongs in the author's lounge. Butterfree was the one who started the original thread on the old forums, if I'm not mistaken.

Don't think I have anything worth bonsai-ing atm, but maybe later.

 

[hopeandjoy]

From Forgiven:

~Prologue~
I stood there. No, that’s too short… I stood there on the ruined earth. I stared at the broken ground, rocks and bits of wall scattered about. The world seemed so bleak, so desolate. I stared at the dead, bloody, and twisted bodies of the two women who were the last line of defense. Unless… Unless I took what Meiun-sama could not find.

Where are they? She couldn’t have taken it… I saw her leave in disgust… I continued to look. Where? Where? Whe- I looked at what seemed to be a drawer in one of the slightly intact walls. I slowly went towards it. Wrapping my hand around the handle, I slowly opened the drawer. Yes! Here they are! I stuck my hand in the drawer and reached towards what I was looking for. Two necklaces. As I reached for the sun-shaped one, it moved away on its own. Almost as if it was alive and knew I wasn’t its mistress. “Look,” I said to the necklace, like it was alive, “I’m not going to take you. I’m going to bring you and your friend,” could necklaces have friends? Of course not… “You and your friend to your mistresses.”

The necklace stopped moving away, and I picked both of them up. As they were made of stone, they were slightly heavy. But I ignored that and turned around, heading to the Kanto region. I was unaware at the time what I was bringing on these two poor girls and their friends. No idea at all.

"I stood there on the drawer and bits of stone, they She couldn’t have friends? "
That's right Kuroi and Meiun, no, Meiun couldn't have friends. And Ketsu likes standing on drawers.

"I stood there.
No, that’s too short… I reached for Two necklaces."
Yep, Ketsu decided to completely change the sentence.

"I said to the necklace, like it moved away on its mistress."
I can't believe it! Nozomi was there!

"I stood there No, that’s too short… I took what Meiun-sama could not find. "
Ketsu, Ketsu. Choose a sentence and stick with it.

"No, that’s too short… I ignored that and bits of stone, they were made of stone, they were slightly heavy."
KETSU! Also, stone is made of stone. I never knew that.

Also they repeated "Where? Where? Whe-" 5 times.

 

[Shiny Grimer]

From the same fic:


After that, we got given a very large, pink bomb, to the source.
The engineer said he wanted my picture!

I was going to give you my nerves as her attempt to the benefit of having weighted lighter.

I hadn’t brought anything, since I can see quite clearly that in a pale hand in the two girls started sniggering in this cabin!” The top bed I exchanged a Bandit.

Soon, she felt.


Like I said, head in the gutter.


Are you walked in Starborn Valley in Wikipedia!?

XD


The Ninji took a Bulky Bob-Omb, which was rather creative, to say.

For a child was kicking it in a Red Card, but not my type of an announcer faded into applause.

The Ninji backed off because I simply won’t mention it.

My personal favorite:

"Your donation to the two girls started sniggering in this cabin!" The pink Birdo gushed.

This is too much fun.

 

[Crazy Weavile]

Your Bonsai Story Tree starter sentences:
BEARS ON SCREEN, THE BEAR SPROUTS WINGS AND FRANKENSTEIN'S CORPSES IN THE BEAR BEFORE CUTTING BACK AND PANNING TO SAM, THE PILOTS IN BIG CITY PARK, WATCHING THE GROUND, GLOWING DIMLY.
THEN, IT IS CONSUMED BY THE SOUND OF DRACULA BEFORE CUTTING BACK AND PANNING TO SAM, THE COCKPIT IS BLOOD ON THE DASHBOARD.
CUT TO SAM, THE COURSE PLOTTING SYSTEM, HE CONTINUES TO A SCENE OUTSIDE THE LAUNCH.
THE BEAR FIRES ITS LASER.
IT IS CONSUMED BY THE SOUND OF LIGHT THROUGH A HALL.
HE NARROWLY DODGES.
HE NARROWLY DODGES.
HE CONTINUES TO MAKE A LITTLE.
THEN, CUT TO A THUD, FOLLOWED BY THE SOUND OF THE BEAR SPROUTS MACHINE GUNS FROM THE GROUND, GLOWING DIMLY.
THEN, IT IS CONSUMED BY THE SOUND OF A BLOODY FLOOR COVERED WITH A LASER SWORD.
Sam: Come and can sprout machine guns have a PhD in their shoulders?
I can't survive them all!
SAM SETS A BEAR LEAPS OUT OF THE COURSE PLOTTING SYSTEM.
Sam: I...
I was a whoopin'!in sync with the planet Earth's line of flying space submarines.
These great planet the stars, to the world- no, the submarine!
Earth?
Earth?
EARTH?!
A MASSIVE BEAM OF BEARS WE HEAR A THUD, FOLLOWED BY THE HEAT AND CHEWING NOISES.
CUT BACK TO JENKINS' AND BEARS, ALL THREE ARE NOW ARMORED.
Sam: Pilot, what's our speed, and have machine guns in the planet the U.S.S.
No-Bear!
APPLAUSE.
MEANWHILE, THE BEAR LUNGES AT A COMMUNICATION TERMINAL.
Sam: Earth?
EARTH?
This is to be chosen for this historic mission.
Ever since I have a PhD in the planet Earth's line of these mother-****ing bears on this historic mission.
Ever since I will avenge you!
I'll find the person who put this submarine and get me, you two get me, you mean...
the U.S.S.
No-Bear!
APPLAUSE.
MEANWHILE, THE SUB HEADING STRAIGHT INTO A SUBMARINE“ LOGO AND HE FLIES BEHIND THE BEAR IS BEHIND SAM.
Bear: Yo!
We cut yo' connection!
Dis' Submarine be headin' back to Pluto?
Frankenstein: RELEASE THEM!
JENKINS UNIVERSAL COMMUNICATOR BEGINS BUZZING.
Jenkins: What was that?
President: Huh?!
A THUD, FOLLOWED BY THE SOUND OF A BLOODY FLOOR COVERED WITH THE DEAD, THE DYING, AND A THUD, FOLLOWED BY THE HEAT AND CHARGES AT A COMMUNICATION TERMINAL.
Sam: Earth?
EARTH?
This is to be headin' back to be chosen for tonight's dinna!
in every subject known to save the mutants?
The rapping ones that President: Huh?!
A MACHINE GUN OUT OF AMNO SHORTLY BEFORE REACHING THE BEAR'S SLASH.
THE COURSE PLOTTING SYSTEM.
Sam: I...
I thought we Pilot 1: Uh...
over the submarine!
Earth?
Earth?
EARTH?!
A SUBMARINE“ LOGO AND EVAPORATES BEARS WE SEE THE SUB HEADING STRAIGHT INTO A BEAR ATTACKS THE COCKPIT.
SAM IT DOES SEVERAL SWEEPS WITH A LASER SWORD.
Sam: Come and wonderful things exist out are we?
Pilot what's our speed, and how far out are we?
Pilot Jenkins: No, I was a horrible mutant rapping bears got here first...
SAM SETS A ROAR AND THE PILOTS IN THE CARGO AREA.
Sam: What is it, Master Frankenstein?
Frankenstein: Release the stars, to the cockpit to the stars, to Pluto?
Frankenstein: RELEASE THEM!
JENKINS FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER LOTS OF LIGHT THROUGH A HALL.
HE THEN DESTROYS THE GROUND, GLOWING DIMLY.
THEN, IT DOES SEVERAL SWEEPS WITH THE DEAD, THE COURSE PLOTTING SYSTEM, HE SEES, BUT MORE KEEP APPEARING.
HE SEES, BUT SAM SKILLFULLY DODGES.
IN HALF.
Sam: I'm sick and get me, you two get a whoopin'!in sync with the world- no, the planet.
SAM COMES UP AND LEAVE.
RIGHT AFTER THEY LEAVE, JENKINS' UNIVERSAL COMMUNICATOR AND EVAPORATES BEARS SLASH.
THE SPACE MARINE SAM SKILLFULLY DODGES.
IN THE CARGO AREA.
Sam: What It's speaking an honor it is to man?
Pilot what's our speed, and kill them!
CUT TO SAM, THE LAUNCH.
THE HEAT AND THE PILOTS IN HALF.
Sam: I'm sick and wonderful things exist out are we?
Pilot what's our speed, and have machine guns have to get to the people of this great planet the bear NATION!
We're hungr-ay, dawg!
Me and kill them!
CUT BACK TO THE COCKPIT.
SAM IT DOES SEVERAL SWEEPS WITH A LASER THE BEAR BEFORE SLICING ITS LASER.
IT IS CONSUMED BY THE HEAT AND PANNING TO A RANDOM IMAGE OF BEARS WE SEE THE COURSE PLOTTING SYSTEM, HE SLICES IT IS CONSUMED BY THE SOUND OF AN OPEN BOX.
Bear: Yo!
I can only one chance to the world- no, the BGM THE SUBMARINE.
WE SEE A THUD, FOLLOWED BY THE SOUND OF A BLOODY FLOOR COVERED WITH A LASER SWORD.
Sam: Mr.
President...
I thought we Pilot 1: Uh...
over nine-hundred-thousand kilometers per hour and get me, you gonna get a whoopin'!in sync with the U.S.S.
No-Bear!
APPLAUSE.
MEANWHILE, THE SUBMARINE.
WE HEAR A THUD, FOLLOWED BY THE HEAT AND PANNING TO JENKINS' AND THE PILOTS IN THE CARGO AREA.
Sam: What is it, Master Frankenstein?
Frankenstein: Release the U.S.S.
No-Bear!
APPLAUSE.
MEANWHILE, THE BEAR SPROUTS MACHINE GUNS BUT SAM IN THE SUBMARINE.
WE SEE A BEAR ATTACKS THE BEAR FIRES ITS LASER.
IT IN HALF.
Sam: I'm sick and wonderful things exist out there.
I thought we were smuggling those to Earth!
Now...
you mean...
the planet Earth's line of this great planet the submarine!
Earth?
Earth?
EARTH?!
A SUBMARINE: ONE MAN VS.
A SCENE OUTSIDE THE COCKPIT IS FILLED WITH A LASER THE BEAR SPROUTS MACHINE GUNS FROM THE GROUND, GLOWING RED BUTTON ON A SUBMARINE“ LOGO AND FRANKENSTEIN'S CORPSES SHOULDER.
HE CONTINUES TO A RANDOM IMAGE OF A BLOODY FLOOR COVERED WITH THE DEAD, THE BEAR FIRES SAM'S ARMOR SPROUTS WINGS AND THE PRESIDENT GET UP AND LEAVE.
RIGHT AFTER THEY LEAVE, JENKINS' UNIVERSAL COMMUNICATOR BEGINS BUZZING.
Jenkins: What ...

Bears On A Submarine makes even less sense!
Jenkins, you have a right to say that.

 

[Noctowl]

The eating room was a smile.
“I’m full now, are you happy?” I love almonds more than Wurmple, but often I love almonds more than me, and underbelly of almonds.
I gulped, looking at the pokemon who was yellow and popped it up with breaking them up.
The hustle and stuck its bottom in my mouth.
I gulped again, and watched me eat with the bright red the pokemon jumped in the air, and was red in colour.
There was a horn on my plate, one I love almonds more than me, and wagged my plate, one of the air.
I ate, slowly lowering his stomach.
“I’m just…” I know you are!” The face, stomach “I’m just…” I needed help with small grey contrasting with a smile.
“I’m full now, are you happy?” I picked one I love almonds on my beak, breaking them up.
The Wurmple continued watching me, as I ate all the poisonous spikes that started leaking purple poison.
“Try me life with a wary look.
The Wurmple glared at the pokemon who was yellow and sat down on my plate, one pokemon on little paper plate was a horn on a lettuce leaf cautiously.
The Wurmple glared at us with a smile.
“I’m full now, are The pokemon all talking and wagged my plate, one I love almonds on my beak, breaking them up.
The lettuce leaf fell to swallow the pokemon who was way smaller horns of parties, and The warm smile, and chattering amazed me; life with Seedeth had given me The lettuce leaf fell to eat.” “Oh, I muttered, trying to swallow the leaf in the air, and was red the pokemon wore.
I ate all a dull and chairs with my beak, breaking the nut up The Wurmple continued watching me as did Josh, he was a great gathering of the six stubby little paper plates.
It reminded me of parties, and swallowed.
The hustle and bustle of a nearly empty set of almonds.
I love almonds more than me, and bustle of the pokemon jumped in two of the same colour There was laughing so much.
I paused, trying to swallow the almonds on the table.
On my plate, one pokemon on my plate, one pokemon on his head that had stuck to my mouth.
I ate all a dull and dragged me as I eat Wurmple, and chattering amazed me; life with a smile.
“I’m full now, are The pokemon on it, a smile.
“I’m full now, are The pokemon wore.
I ...

Best. Chapter extract. Ever. XD *wants to do this with more of her chapters*

*does it to her random news report on da*

Liz: Well, yet again it won't rain!
I didn't know it'd turn her *rolls eyes*
Seedeth: Hopefully, it is another warm in here!
Liz: *to turtwig* Can you
Liz: No. You are giving me a headache.
Seedeth: You need to fix her.
*rolls eyes* Seedeth: Hopefully, it is another warm day here
Liz: *to turtwig* Can you take this...somewhere else!?
Turtwig: Ok.
*takes suitcase which is another warm day here in Wallingford.
Seedeth: Oh yes, a headache. >>
Seedeth: Happy happy happ...ee!
*gets pushed into suitcase, which is another warm in here!*
Liz: *to turtwig* Can you take this...somewhere else!?
Turtwig: Ok.
*takes suitcase to next room* Liz: Pish, I shouldn't have installed the dark!
Yay, its warm in here!
Liz: *to turtwig* Can you take this...somewhere else!?
Turtwig: Ok.
*takes suitcase to next room* Liz: Pish, I shouldn't have installed the emoticons are working for us
Liz: Well, yet again it is another warm day here in Wallingford.
Seedeth: Oh yes, a wonderful day!
^^ Liz: *whispering* I didn't know it'd turn her into an ultimate prep.
>> TURTWIG!
...

 

[Mad MOAI]

The Messenger had found hiding places The Messenger continued forward, exploring the brick wall of night, lampposts' lights shone on the brick wall of its paws.
This was a parking lot beside it; on the brick wall of him.
In the same time?
Soon, the house, coming to the being slowed down, taking in the information in the city.
Soon, it had broken into a parking lot beside it; on On the fence was a shop selling cups of its paws.
This was a good look at the same time?
Soon, the being slowed down, taking in the information in the large enough for the place, even though it About a broken swingset.
There was a neighborhood, much less busy than the street around.
The Messenger had found hiding places where it About a short hedge with the building This was locked and squeezed itself into a run, with a large sights.
Even the Master once it About a hold of night, lampposts' lights shone on the left, there was a good idea.
What if it had been this big.
Cars were rushing everywhere, with a parking lot beside it; on On the dark house The Messenger had reached a short hedge with a parking lot beside it; on the left, there was a good look at this place.
The Messenger continued forward, exploring the house, coming to the beast came to a large grassy area and squeezed itself into the dark of night, lampposts' lights shone on On the city.
The Messenger had never seen It turned again.
That didn't matter.
It turned again.
That didn't matter.
It just continued walking, taking in the Master had never seen It turned again.
That didn't matter.
It would transfer it got a good look at this place.
The door was covered in the large grassy area and ragged, and drink such things before, but turned one of him.
In the place, even though it had been in the city.
The Messenger felt a good idea.
What if it recognised the building coming to meet it.
About a hole in splinters.
The otherworld beast came across an old, abandoned house.
Its windows were boarded, and a broken swingset.
There was a large grassy area and the door large enough for the dark of him.
In the large sights.
Even the city.
The Messenger walked faster, anxious to the backyard.
There was a minute later, the same time?
Soon, the back door, large enough for the being slowed down, taking in the door was a short hedge with barely any water in the silver and a broken swingset.
There was a run, with a parking lot ...

A mysterious creature let out of the humans call me?
Darn them all...
crazy things...
The apparent Messenger Owww!
The creature's long, thick tail Which is not visible in the shadows, this I'll watch what the humans call me?
Darn them all...
crazy things...
The man cried out, stepping back as blood dripped out a quiet, male-sounding gasp.
Then, it quietly told the human.
Simple weapons like one.
Then, the man walked forward, toward the creature's hiding place At the great gust of the alley...
and easily twisted out a quiet, frustrated grunt and easily twisted out a quiet, frustrated grunt and grumbled.
Its clawed paws reached out a weapon that I will overcome this time louder.
Darn you, Messenger!
Owww!
The creature watched carefully as it raced past tall buildings.
The Messenger grinned, satisfied with the side-claw of velocity.
The creature remained still.
Come out, I won't hurt you.
The messenger did this.
I'll watch what the humans coming toward the creature's hiding place At the Messenger threw its mouth and growled, pulling out a weapon that the creature felt its mouth and stored it raised its name This name...
is not visible in the shadows, this world's evil ones.
Now, you The half-human used its mouth and focused on its enemy.
Again, the man walked forward, toward the creature's hiding place At the top of the group came over the shadows, this time louder.
Darn them all...
crazy things...
The creature continued to land safely on its surroundings.
It crouched in the great gust of the alley...
and forth in front of his grunts.
The creature continued to land safely on the pavement as it raced past tall buildings.
The grunts took the human.
Prepare for your DEATH!
The purple-suited man said.
The deadly creature felt its paw forward, aiming the fence that fired iron spheres.
He clenched his teeth and hurled itself at the humans call me?
Darn them all...
crazy things...
The creature's long, thick tail Which is not visible in the great gust of the group came over the great gust of its name This name...
is no way to defeat me, it let out a weapon that fired iron spheres.
He pulled the top of the alley...
and fence to look at the creature.
Is anyone there?
the group came in front of his grunts.
The Messenger knew the streets.
The apparent Messenger Owww!
The creature continued to reach into view.
The venom would automatically be getting too many The other-world being closed its enemy.
Again, the creature.
Is anyone there?
the Messenger filled the streets.
The creature's eyes and focused on his face.
The creature's feet made an entertained chuckle and at the tip of the way, deepening the Messenger threw its eyes.
The deadly creature watched carefully as it raced past tall buildings.
The creature's eyes The starlight filled the shadows, this what the alley...
and easily twisted out I won't hurt you.
The creature's eyes and focused on the pavement as a brown-haired man walked forward, toward the creature's hiding place with an evil grin on the pavement as a brown-haired man lowered himself to the sound of the three humans call me?
Darn you, Messenger!
Owww!
The man's life ended as he heard the Messenger's final words A seven-foot fence The tan-skinned animal Its slit-pupiled eyes The starlight once again reflected off of the Messenger threw its paw forward, aiming the pavement as a brown-haired man Its clawed paws reached out I won't hurt you.
The man's life ended as a brown-haired man was lying.
It bent its paw forward, aiming the image waved back and forth in the great gust of the three humans call me?
Darn them all...
crazy things...
The creature remained still.
Come out, I thought so, the creature's presence.
I will overcome this time on its enemy.
Again, the human.
Simple weapons like yours are much too ...

 

[Darksong]

I took part of my Warriors fanfic, Glow of Moonlight, and put it here.
Original:

He waited in the very spot that he and his friends had fought the stranger earlier, and soon, he heard someone coming through the trees. As its head was revealed, it growled, "You again?"
"Who are you?" Jazz asked. "Why did you attack me?"
As if the cat trusted Jazz more, it got a bit closer to him. "My name is Lightningpaw. I live with another group of cats a bit deeper into this forest." Lightningpaw lowered his voice a bit. "This is our territory."

"Your territory?" Jazz was puzzled. "As in the place where you live?"
Lightningpaw nodded. His white fur stood out from the black surroundings. "What did you say you were called again?"
"Uh, Jazz."
"What a strange name..." Lightningpaw looked thoughtful, then serious again. "Listen. Come back here tomorrow at sunhigh. And bring your friends with you." With that, he dashed off.
"Wha-" Jazz tried to stop the white tom, but he realized it was no use. Silently he wandered back to the Twoleg nests, sleeping under the shelter of a tree.

And through the Bonsai thing...

He waited in the very spot that he dashed off.
Makes sense in one way or another.

Wha- Jazz more, it growled, You again?
"What? Jazz more," it growled. You again?

Who are you?
I am Gardevoir.

Jazz tried to the Twoleg nests, sleeping under the cat trusted.
Why sleep under a cat?

Jazz tried to the Twoleg nests, sleeping under the white tom, but he wandered back here tomorrow at sunhigh.
Another "sleeping under."
Grammar mistake: He wanders back here tomorrow at sunhigh, OR He wandered back here yesterday at sunhigh.

And bring your friends had fought the place where you were called again?
How can you fight the place you were called?

Uh, Jazz.
Could be an answer to the question "What's your favorite music?"

What did you say you say you live?
"What did you say? You say you live?"

Lightningpaw lowered his voice a bit.
See next sentence.

This is our territory.
See next sentence.

Your territory?
This and the two sentences before stayed the same.

Jazz more, it got a bit closer to the Twoleg nests, sleeping under the stranger
earlier, and his friends had fought the white tom, but he dashed off.
Wait a minute. Sleeping under the stranger?... o_O

Wha- Jazz tried to him.
So "him" is a verb now?

My name is Lightningpaw.
Normal sentence.

I live with another group of cats a bit deeper into this forest.
Ditto.

Lightningpaw I live with another group of a tree.
Don't you mean, "Lightningpaw, I live with another group of trees"?

He waited in the very spot that he and soon, he realized it got a bit closer to him.
The spot got closer to him? But he was perfectly on that spot!

My name is Lightningpaw.
Normal sentence.

I live with another group of a tree He ...

Sounds a bit like singing to me.

 

[Vladimir Putin's LJ]

Okay, gave this a shot. Won't post the original story because it sucks balls (even though it's on my dA but who cares) and the results weren't very coherent, but this part made me happy:

What did he tell me?
‘Well, for that, I was a little beauty spot under his thin gold eyeglasses on Saturdays, when we were nineteen.
I noticed a good Jew, than the fact that he wasn’t a growing attraction, and he was younger.
He used to have the street didn’t see us.
He never forced us He never forbade us It was a completely different story at school, saying that people from eating pork or shellfish, provided the other inhabitants of course, he should stay at home Even though we lived in a rather Orthodox neighbourhood, he could have little necklaces with my father, ...

If it included the massive amounts of gay contained in the original I would totally delete the real thing and post this instead.
Especially love the last sentence.

 

[surskitty]

Some more entertaining segments from inputting my ficbits file~~ a lot of these actually make sense, probably because it's all ficbits? TWO IN A ROW MEANS THEY WERE NEXT TO EACH OTHER hee some of these are okay and yes 'you will join the boxing club' showed up that many times and actually two or three more times than that?

Lussuria had adjusted their endeavour.

You will join the boxing club!!

Quite possibly the worst decision Mangusta had gotten the box animals.

although that would overreact apologetically and yelling, You will join the boxing club!

he growled, slurring his approach: that all?

No, she had made himself scarce.

The unfortunate dentist looked like he wouldn't notice that Tsuna would worry Tsuna-san!

Luckily for the decrepit couch to finally be abandoned by the Black Lotus!

Um, Bianchi-nee, I don't need a Black Lotus!

No one is to look through the ingredients list.

No, she probably wouldn't try to kill him that cavities, especially given that the single worst thing about having temporarily forgotten that even the trance.
...
is probably unrelated.

And he probably had a day for Ken to die from it.

He frowned.

That's as trigger-happy as capable of a few feet away.

Not that the desolation bullet while Hibari was of Gokudera's Hatred for the Tenth....

Upon discovering that remote goes there....

The unfortunate dentist looked like he tried.

While trying to accept his friends spent the weekend playing Rock Band.

No Good Tsuna wonders if said baby had taken a good idea.

He probably didn't want to hear the lollipop.

You will join the boxing club!

The mage doesn't know, and Reborn's exploits, especially given that Belphegor was starting to keep their boss, and his ilk; Chrome will win, Mukuro due to say, it's all One of Varia with Reborn was never a good plan, Bianchi-nee, are a girl!

Stop bothering the original Star Wars trilogy, Ryohei had apparently decided that strange homeroom teacher.

So extreme, in no sane world would not do you want?

You will join the boxing club!!

Gokudera is irritated.

The fox glared at random.

I need a feat considering how Redd was obvious.

Three dashes will do prior to his audience of Reborn asks him to put on a dress.

Hey, Tsuna?
You're not worth antagonising.

It had taken a while for the boy would rarely be bothered to dismember the child, especially given that his captor probably didn't want to know.

 

[Murkrowfeather]

Sherry looked out the kitchen window at that shed in the backyard. To most people, the automatic response is, "Shed? What about it?" However, Sherry was not most people. Her response would probably be more like, "Oh yeah, the shed. That's not really my space, so I'm just gonna stay away..." For inside that unusually large shed, her brother was chugging away at some machine or other. Arceus knows what it does. Indeed, there was a teenage boy in that shed, and yes, he was partial to machine company rather than that of the human or Pokemon varieties. He had been so determined to keep the contents of his shed a secret that he had even installed a small communication device in stragetic places so that his mother could tell him when dinner was ready, that he had to get the mail, or something like that. Right now, he had to go out into town and get some groceries and things. Nothing much - just some milk, some eggs, and a box of those water bottles that fit better in your hand. Thankfully, he was able to do that by taking the water, placing the eggs on top of it, and tucking the milk in behind - but he didn't need to do that. The milk and eggs would go in a plastic bag, and the water was in the other arm. He kicked the door open due to lack of free hands, placed the groceries on the table, got an apple to eat, and went back outside to continue doing...well, whatever it was he was doing.

He slammed the door. Even though it's outside the house, Sherry's mother hates when he does that - he might break the lock or something. "So what," he replies when his mother consults him on the subject, "I'll just make a better one."

You now know quite a bit about this kid, but you're missing one thing: His name.

That was part of the first chapter of my unpublished fic Mechaniac. (If you read it, you can probably tell who it's about... >~<)So here it is Bonsai'd...

Sherry looked out the kitchen window at that shed in the mail, or Pokemon varieties.
He had been so I'm just make a teenage boy in your hand.
Thankfully, he replies when dinner was chugging away For inside that Right now, he replies when his mother consults him on the lock or Pokemon varieties.
He slammed the table, got an apple to continue doing...well, whatever it However, Sherry looked out the kitchen window at that shed a secret that of the water, placing the backyard.
To most people.
Her response would probably be more like, Oh yeah, the water, placing the contents of the human or Pokemon varieties.
He slammed the eggs on top of those water placing the other arm.
He had been so that his mother consults him when dinner was chugging away at some eggs, and went back outside to continue doing...well, whatever it and tucking the kitchen window at some machine or other.
Arceus knows what he replies when he does Indeed, there was chugging away For inside that he had been so that his shed a box of it, and eggs would probably be more like, Oh yeah, the automatic response is, Shed?
What about it?
However, Sherry was not most people.
Her response is, Shed?
What about this kid, but he didn't need to keep the human or something.
So what, he was able to do that.
The milk and eggs would go in a better one.
You now know quite a better one.
You now he had even installed a secret that of the water was in the groceries on top of those water was in that shed, and the water placing the other arm.
He had been so I'm just make a plastic bag, and went back outside to continue doing...well, whatever it does.
Indeed, there was he was doing.
He had been so I'm just make a better one.
You now he had been so that his ...

 

[Alxprit]

This is my, Torchic's, journal's first three entries bonsai'd. Enjoy.

So I served as a human… but I got the jist down. My old name was in fact a rather small circle of a bed made out of friends. Ah, that’s all changing! Since nobody knows me, I could be hay, though I had a rather small circle of a bed made out of friends. Ah, that’s all changing! Since nobody knows me, I wasn’t that kind of person as a human but I’ll live with it.
This isn’t a few more later.

So I found it comfortable as a human either. But I think I should explain! Listen, I’m only telling myself and I lived with it. This isn’t a girl, who knew? so I found this something I’d secretly wanted?

So I served as a human… but I got the odd comfort of entries and my friend helped pay for a new life… is this something I’d secretly wanted?

So I served as a human guidance counselor. OK, more things about my old name was until I remember something I’d secretly wanted?
So I’ve realized a new life… is this something I’d secretly wanted?

So I found it comfortable as backup for it, even a page of friends. Chikorita on a bed made out of what appears to finally find this something I’d secretly wanted? I found it comfortable as backup for a new life… is this I somehow turned into a Torchic overnight. Creepy, right? Well, that kind of a bed made out of a bed made out of friends. Ah, that’s all changing! Since nobody knows me, I lived with my big brother and I lived with it. This isn’t a bit hard to be a new life… is this. Thank you, tight beak, for Chikorita on a new life… is this trapped… umm, I could be falling in the odd comfort of friends. Ah, that’s all changing! Since nobody knows me, I could be wrong. I’d have never would to finally find...

"My old name was in fact a rather small circle of a bed made out of friends." -Yes, torchic's name is a circle of a bed.

"Since nobody knows me, I could be hay. . ." -Whaaa?

". . .but I got the odd comfort of entries and my friend helped pay for a new life… is this something I’d secretly wanted?" -Next time I go to the store I should find one of them new lives.

"Well, that kind of a bed made out of a bed made out of friends." -... This really is something.

"Since nobody knows me, I lived with my big brother and I lived with it." -Sounds normal, but it isn't.

"umm, I could be falling in the odd comfort of friends." -Yes, I'm falling into something intangible.


Yes, this is a story you've never heard of. Deal with it.

 

[Ahouji]

An excerpt from an RP [in full literary style]-turned-fic that a friend and I are working on, Tempest, has been bonsai'd. It'll never see the light of this forum. .-. I like working on it, but I'd need my coauthor's permission and she usually handles distribution, so.

Mm-mm, nothing better-- After way too many donuts?
Lance remarked, putting his feet.
Think What pokemon and two wiseass pokemon are known to a vegetarian!
Sally replied in that; it for good measure.
No, no, nothing sounds better to a moment, but what...
Anubis, you're an instant later, he rubbed at the air.
Wow, how appetizing!
he remarked, blinking.
...
but you know how this time.
It had a forest; thus, wild pokemon were far more abundant.
More fun to be the sacrifice if he could without them as whatever was in its eyes, the ground by the dog, prepared this sudden edginess.
The dog paused kneeling down to be a wonder they bother asking for a second.
You were on the dog off of it, standing up straight.
Evidently, he was bowled over, on edge as her butterfree searched.
Not much movement escaped the creamy flesh continued, instead forming a forest; thus, wild pokemon with the bandaged portion of donuts and two wiseass pokemon it was in the Rukario replied cheerfully, but you know what I Lance responded, not looking forward to it...
Nor am I, Lance responded, not bothering to speak with those pokemon.
Oh, me, I'm looking forward to his feet.
Think for a little jig, Can't wait!
Glad to meet 'whatever it Nor am I, Lance remarked, putting his feet.
Think for a wonder they bother asking for good measure.
No, no, nothing better-- After way too many donuts?
Lance responded, not It had the best of its species, more bent...
and two wiseass pokemon and two wiseass pokemon it was as Lance remarked, putting his little dance, sniffing at the dancing rukario.
Either laughter or exoskeleton; however, instead of a land full of whatever was retreated back the small claw.
Of course, the dog muttered, slapping his little dance, sniffing at the bandaged portion of names.
Subconsciously, he remarked, blinking.
...
but frowning slightly.

I only translated a small portion, and of those, I just chose a few random paragraphs-- this isn't from any solid part of the chapter. I really don't want to see what'd happen if I put the ENTIRE THING through it... ._.

 

[Mad MOAI]

This is the bonsaid introduction of Furyclaw's den.

You are walking through a deep voice: Hello.
Long echoes?
Furyclaw accepts you spy a growl, and step inside.
Sound-seer?
You soon reach the cave, but what you spy a grassy field when you into the den of glowing yellow eyes staring back at you.
How do you into a den?
You cannot see in the cave, but what you do see is a pair of glowing yellow eyes staring back at you.
Normal :P
You hear a deep voice: Hello.
Normal :P
Furyclaw accepts you You hear a cave in the cave, but what you spy a deep voice: Hello.
You hear a cave in the cave, but you spy a deep voice?
Furyclaw accepts you ...
Hooray!

It was pretty good in general.

 

[Worst Username Ever]

This is the bonsai'd verson of a planned one-shot:

Mint the shape of rain fell to the ground into a Pokémon could see the shape of rain fell to the ground and made the ground into a feeling of the best dinners she was inside and a really tasty one of the hole in this horrible weather.
She was glad she didn't have a Pokémon friend.
Her owner but she wasn't outside On warm, but she always had a feeling of loneliness...
she wanted a really tasty one too!
Spaghetti with taste and a really tasty one of the best dinners she ran and a Pokémon was raining outside.
Big drops of rain fell to help the Chikorita was a Charmander!
Mint the Chikorita was looking out of the window, slacking off at a fellow Pokémon to help the ground and a really tasty one of the hole in this horrible weather.
She was glad she had ever eaten.
She had no choice.
She had no choice.
She noticed something moving, something under a plant, something under a Pokémon could want, and got everything a fellow Pokémon to the ground and made the shape of the window, slacking off at a fellow Pokémon to help the hole in this horrible weather.
She had just oozing with Wait!
She noticed something

What...the...crap?