Internet Friends/Real Life Friends

[ultraviolet]

Many of you with parents who aren't 100% overjoyed at the amount of time you spend on a computer will have had the notion of 'Internet Friends' brought up. Many parents can have trouble with the idea of these Internet Friends, people who you have never physically met, being as close to you a friends who you have physically met. No matter how close a connection you can have with these people, it seems some think a physical presence is required.

What do you think? Is a physical meeting required to be classed as a true friend? Can internet friends be just as close as friends in real life? I know the results of an internet community may be a little biased, but I'm still going to ask the question.

Can internet friends be equal to real life friends?

I think it's worth noting that there's probably a discrepancy between how old someone is when they've got internet friends - I only started actively having internet friends when I was about fifteen or so. My parents were mostly okay with it as long as I didn't give out things like my phone number, but I'm sure they'd be against my eight-year-old sister having internet friends. I'm nineteen so my parents don't really care so much what I do on the internet (at least partly because I understand the internet a whole lot better than they do), but I can understand how hard it must be for younger people to get it past their parents.

Personally I don't think physically meeting someone is a criterion for whether someone is a 'real friend' or not (though I would like to meet MD, Altmer and like half of #tcod), but I can't really blame parents for worrying. :U I'm kind of blessed in that I have a circle of amazing friends offline and online.

 

[Cerberus87]

I have internet friends whom I hold in higher regard than most of my real life friends, of course we didn't meet but when one lives in South America and the others in Europe it's a bit difficult isn't it? :p I'm regularly in touch with them though, can't say the same for my real life friends.

 

[Ever]

I know my parents aren't totally comfortable with my having internet friends, but as long as I don't give out too much information they're fairly cool about it.

I personally find it easier to talk about issues with my internet friends. In fact I feel closer to many of my internet friends than my real-life friends. Like Butterfree said, many of my real-life friends don't share my interests. My life practically revolves around Pokemon and MLP, and well...there aren't exactly people I know who a) like Pokemon or b) are willing to talk about it in front of their friends. Even less so for MLP. In fact, I know absolutely no one at my school who watches/likes it. So I personally think internet friends can actually be better friends that real-life friends. Not that I don't love all my real-life friends, but these days we have nothing/very little to talk about.

Sorry if I rambled on a bit.

 

[Monoking]

My exact situation

Like I said, i'm in the exact situation except I don't actaully have real life friends anymore....
Don't pity me.

 

[Dannichu]

Internet friends and offline friends are both fantastic, and while it might be easier to find people who share your interests in an online setting (1. Google 'Pokemon forum', 2. Join Pokemon forum, 3. ???, 4. Profit), actually living with people who join in your singing-along with the Buffy musical and will discuss their favourite Who companions and such is pretty much the best ever.

It's pretty excellent when the line between the two ceases to exist, though - when you've met up with people you initially met over the internet several times, and you get to actually see them frequently in addition to chatting online. And then introduce them to your offline friends.

Although it's worth mentioning that not everyone is the same offline as they are on - I've never had an experience like this, but I've had friends who've met up with people they'd met online, and it turned out they were quite different to the person they (thought they) knew, and awkwardness ensued.

 

[Saith]

I can't be doing with internet friends, really. That'snot to say they're any less than real life friends or whatever, just my personal preference. I need someone actually there in order to have a good time with them.
I doubt I'd ever meet up with someone from the internet though. My cousin met some Londoner over WoW and invited him down for the Mardis Gras in Cardiff. The kid ended up staying for three weeks, eating all the food, wracking up huge bills, never leaving the flat and stealing all the money. And wanking over the pictures of 15 year old girls.
He seemed so innocent, too.

 

[allitersonance]

I'm closer with my online friends than my offline friends because they're the only ones I interact with :V I am probably the person that parents fear their children will turn into.

I don't think close offline friendships are in my future or even something I actually want, since I don't do closeness and barely do social interaction in general, but I greatly prefer online interaction. Low upkeep costs and everything. Most of the time, if I meet someone offline, I let the potential friendship die of neglect.

Also if I met up with an internet friend offline, my contribution to the conversation would basically be a terrified "..." while I can pretend I have a functioning brain over the Internet, so it is not a thing that should happen. Ever. :D Though all ... two ... of them are normally an ocean away, so it's not something that could be arranged anyhow.

It is possible I'm just not a good person.

It is fact that I am not good at being a person.

 

[Minish]

I've had more online friends than off since I was about eleven, so imagining that not even being there is impossible for me. I would be so, so much lonelier if I had to deal with only people I met irl - for a start, I'm really anxious and self-conscious in-person, but already having known someone for at least a year or two makes meeting them so much easier for me.

Also, my mother has absolutely no ground to stand on - her friends are mostly from forums, too. :P That said, she did insist on phoning Dannichu to make sure she wasn't a fifty year old guy (she wasn't).

I find meeting internet friends in general really quite fun, but I think I could live without it - it's just nice to have hugs and hanging out with people you know well, and that tends to mean my online friends, so! I think it would be unfair and pretty sad to dismiss their worth just because they're far away, especially when all my irl friends are just as far away now as UK TCoDers. Sad times for the Cirrus. :C

 

[Tarvos]

I met my ex on the internet and we dated for two years. It can happen! I've met several of my online friends (including Butterfree and opaltiger from this forum, a TON from the Nightwish forums, one smogoner), but I'm closer to my rl friends because I see them more often, we share interests anyway (take that internet forums), play in a band together, all that. This is not to say that I don't consider my internet friends real friends - I do - but I see my rl friends more often and that makes it easier to gauge how to respond to people.

I think people are compatible because of personality, and because the internet affords you anonymity, this means the way you act, your interests and so forth become a much better gauge of your character. The downside is anonymity lets you do a lot of things you normally wouldn't get away with. I know for myself that the internet-me and the real life me are similar, but strikingly different in one way - I am much more timid, calm and quiet in real life than on the internet. However, the basic personality aspects never change; I like meeting people through the webs, partly because you never know what exactly you're gonna get (even if you have an idea, things can turn out to be VERY different) and because I am much more interested in people that don't have the same mode of living as I do.

One of the best parts of dating a foreigner I met through the internet was that I had to adapt to a very different attitude and idea and view on life, even though we were intellectually and socially from a really similar background. Get used to different foods (mici, yum!), different holidays (try celebrating Passover instead of Easter) and so on and so forth. This is the best part: it puts you in contact with people from places you'd otherwise NEVER BE ABLE TO MEET.

 

[goldenquagsire]

What about when the boundaries between internet and irl friends gets blurred? :o

My best friend from school (he's down in Oxford, the smug bastard) and I talk almost every day on either skype or facebook and text each other like mad. We're currently gossiping over the details of each others' love lives like a pair of schoolgirls. :D

However, I'm not going to be seeing him irl again until Christmas, which is a bit depressing. :(

 

[Harlequin]

I'm closer with my online friends than my offline friends because they're the only ones I interact with :V I am probably the person that parents fear their children will turn into.

I don't think close offline friendships are in my future or even something I actually want, since I don't do closeness and barely do social interaction in general, but I greatly prefer online interaction. Low upkeep costs and everything. Most of the time, if I meet someone offline, I let the potential friendship die of neglect.

Also if I met up with an internet friend offline, my contribution to the conversation would basically be a terrified "..." while I can pretend I have a functioning brain over the Internet, so it is not a thing that should happen. Ever. :D Though all ... two ... of them are normally an ocean away, so it's not something that could be arranged anyhow.

It is possible I'm just not a good person.

It is fact that I am not good at being a person.

Considering that a staple phrase used by each of us when we speak is "...", I think you'd manage fairly well.

:D

 

[nastypass]

I, too, have blurred the lines between internet and face to face friends ("real life" friends sounds like a silly to me, seeing as the internet does in fact exist in real life)! Met H-land here, then he ended up going to a college about twenty minutes away, without realizing its proximity to me. We have done things together, but we still talk mainly through IRC. :B

Then there's Verne (VERNE we need to do things again also dunkaroos (i am still mad that my mum did not let us go find a walmart or something and get some (after you FORGOT THEM you are the worst birthday partygoer ever seriously who forgets to bring the present) (jk ilu vern))) who I managed to convince my uncle to drag along to my birthday in September. Fun was had by all, except for his hat.