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King of the Hill

The bank is not able to afford the hill due to recession.
They set auction it off.
I get top bid.
My hill
 
I use legal powers to purchase your HILL as you are not maintaining the HILL very effectively! I get advice from Wolfram & Hart, thanks to whom I am able to retake possession of my HILL!
 
I trim your hair in a manner that attracts large, angry birds, who attack you and knock you off the hill.

My HILL.
 
I screw the rules because I have money (oh, wait, no. Forgot I'm a student) and summon a giant hill that destroys your hill. My Hill!
 
*suits up in BlasTech X-32 armor*
*charges up the hill and blasts Mijimaru off the hill with the plasma wrist-cannon*

My HILL!!
 
I stand before Blas side-on with my arm outstretched, saying how you shouldn't mix Games up like that, then I hit you with an Incineration Jutsu sending you flying off the HILL, so seeing as there's no one else around: My HILL!
 
I tell Jace where there is going to be a Pony meet, here in Leeds! You are able to get there due to Instant Transmission, and the fact you suddenly conveniently know someone in Leeds, leaving unattended what is now My HILL!
 
I steal Kiba's blimp, fit it with heat seeking rocket launchers and paint the words MY HILL in giant pink letters on the side. I then Blast the hill to oblivion with overwhelming firepower until all that is left is a smoking crater.
MY CRATER.

Woops excuse me. I mean

MY HILL
 
I'M IN THE STORM MODE!!! Such fireworks do not affect me! So I come to kick you off the Blimp! Now I'M ON A BLIMP! Sorry, I mean: My HILL!
 
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