Radish HQ

[Clover]

(( OKAY SCREW THIS I'M GOING TO DITCH MY ORIGINAL PLAN (what was my original plan anyway) AND MAKE STUFF UP MORE >D ))

"Bigglyfuff," it says definitively. It's probably called something very intelligent and dignified, but its Igglybuff/Space Clefairy pidgin's thick enough that the charmander seems to have no idea what it just said, much less you, whether or not you'd understand it normally.

You might as well find something to call it.

Inside the building, it is ... dark and uninteresting. Or well there's a general sense of what you are looking for is not here and it's still super-foggy. The igglybuff seems remarkably unbothered; perhaps normal-types are very good at ignoring the supernatural? The charmander's staying very close to you, anyway.

Something smells funny, sort of like -- gas? The igglybuff says something, though, and it dissipates. Now what?

--

* Its actual name would translate to Igglybuff that's Really Bad at Cooking and Likes to Try Anyway, or simply Depressingly Useless Baby, but there's no way to tell and that's not exactly a great thing to be called. Space clefairy tend to have different names depending on current station; this igglybuff wasn't exactly high on the pecking order. It is very sad.

You should rename it.

She frowns and scruffles the plushy pokémon's hair tuft. 'Bigglyfuff' isn't the greatest name, and... and the clefairy mentioned that he'd be joining for the experience of being a captured pokémon, and with that comes a trainer's nickname. So. She lets her mind wander and make connections to come up with his name, as she does with every new addition: the word for igglybuff was 'pupurin' in Japanese... hm, 'Rin'! And jigglypuff were known for liking singing... though this was a rarer male, so...

"Len, then. You can be Len!" She smiles and idly traces the spiral on Len's forehead, but her smile is quickly lost when she looks around. No pokémon that she can see, just spirits and ethereal could-bes in the mist, barely troublesome.

(It's not that she's afraid of the dark, or of things that go bump in the night. Just the unknown. For all her wanderlust and love of adventure, she never wants to think she doesn't have control over the situation. She didn't know what to expect in the craft, and she doesn't know what to expect outside, but you expect ghosts and such in haunted houses. That's what 'haunted house' means, after all.)

(Anyway.)

Anyway. Irritated at the ~nothing~ that has presented itself to her, and figuring she wouldn't be able to sleep soundly in this place at any rate, she gives a soft kick to the nearest wall with the top of her shoe (letting out an 'eep' and jumping back when the rotten plaster crumbles in at the touch) and instructs Charmer to follow her out the door she came through not moments ago, thoughts inexplicably filled with train tracks and scarlet-colored fish.

Taking a glance at the sky, she rubs her arms in the chilled, damp air. Her outfit of jeans and a t-shirt (her current one depicts some sort of colorful trophy on the front and '2004 Kanto Princess Festival' in small type on the back) fits most of the climate in the region; it gets cooler or warmer in some areas, but she didn't think to bring a jacket out this time. It's tolerable, in any case. And the light... still bright enough to read by, though barely in this fog, and she might only have an hour, hour and a half of it left.

"Best get going, then," she says aloud to Len and Charmer (who appears to be doing better now that they're back outside). Of course, her visibility probably couldn't get a lot worse after the sun goes down... She can't see any landmarks or tall trees to aim towards, so...

"Nowhere to go but straight, I guess. Let's just keep moving until we can find our bearings." She makes a face at the fog and follows the wisp of flame from Charmer. Brave guy, really; he'll be the first to run into anything like the aforementioned poison nests or ledges. But then, she can always recall or use healing items on him if it gets too bad. She makes a silent wish to no one in particular that she won't run into trouble, and steps unsteadily toward the flickering incandescence.

 

[surskitty]

She frowns and scruffles the plushy pokémon's hair tuft. 'Bigglyfuff' isn't the greatest name, and... and the clefairy mentioned that he'd be joining for the experience of being a captured pokémon, and with that comes a trainer's nickname. So. She lets her mind wander and make connections to come up with his name, as she does with every new addition: the word for igglybuff was 'pupurin' in Japanese... hm, 'Rin'! And jigglypuff were known for liking singing... though this was a rarer male, so...

"Len, then. You can be Len!" She smiles and idly traces the spiral on Len's forehead, but her smile is quickly lost when she looks around. No pokémon that she can see, just spirits and ethereal could-bes in the mist, barely troublesome.

(It's not that she's afraid of the dark, or of things that go bump in the night. Just the unknown. For all her wanderlust and love of adventure, she never wants to think she doesn't have control over the situation. She didn't know what to expect in the craft, and she doesn't know what to expect outside, but you expect ghosts and such in haunted houses. That's what 'haunted house' means, after all.)

(Anyway.)

Anyway. Irritated at the ~nothing~ that has presented itself to her, and figuring she wouldn't be able to sleep soundly in this place at any rate, she gives a soft kick to the nearest wall with the top of her shoe (letting out an 'eep' and jumping back when the rotten plaster crumbles in at the touch) and instructs Charmer to follow her out the door she came through not moments ago, thoughts inexplicably filled with train tracks and scarlet-colored fish.

Taking a glance at the sky, she rubs her arms in the chilled, damp air. Her outfit of jeans and a t-shirt (her current one depicts some sort of colorful trophy on the front and '2004 Kanto Princess Festival' in small type on the back) fits most of the climate in the region; it gets cooler or warmer in some areas, but she didn't think to bring a jacket out this time. It's tolerable, in any case. And the light... still bright enough to read by, though barely in this fog, and she might only have an hour, hour and a half of it left.

"Best get going, then," she says aloud to Len and Charmer (who appears to be doing better now that they're back outside). Of course, her visibility probably couldn't get a lot worse after the sun goes down... She can't see any landmarks or tall trees to aim towards, so...

"Nowhere to go but straight, I guess. Let's just keep moving until we can find our bearings." She makes a face at the fog and follows the wisp of flame from Charmer. Brave guy, really; he'll be the first to run into anything like the aforementioned poison nests or ledges. But then, she can always recall or use healing items on him if it gets too bad. She makes a silent wish to no one in particular that she won't run into trouble, and steps unsteadily toward the flickering incandescence.

(( MORAL OF THE STORY: I have no idea what I'm doing for this segment. ))

"Pulin?" it tries. It seems satisfied enough.

There's not really that much on the route, though you hear something call "YAAAAAAAAAAAA" once or twice. Whatever it is, it doesn't approach; it seems to be circling around a wide area.

You see a purple nidoran briefly, but it scurries off into a hole. A large dark grey wolf chases after it and starts to dig. You could probably try to catch one or both of them.

 

[Darksong]

I guess I'll head to the field of meat, since I'm hungry...

I place $4 in the tip jar and head on out... kind of nervous but also curious. At least I have Swinub, and Torchic, and Luxio...

 

[Clover]

(( MORAL OF THE STORY: I have no idea what I'm doing for this segment. ))

"Pulin?" it tries. It seems satisfied enough.

There's not really that much on the route, though you hear something call "YAAAAAAAAAAAA" once or twice. Whatever it is, it doesn't approach; it seems to be circling around a wide area.

You see a purple nidoran briefly, but it scurries off into a hole. A large dark grey wolf chases after it and starts to dig. You could probably try to catch one or both of them.

(( As long as we can get to a segment where you know what you're doing! ))

Ooh, a nidoran! One of the Kantos she doesn't have yet. Er-- oh dearie, that poor creature is being attacked by that big bad wolf! She'd best go help him! Yeah.

"Go, Charmer!" she says. Putting down Len near her feet, she points towards the fight and Charmer gets into a battling position. She's mildly amused she didn't have to release him first, reminded of the recent trend in Johto where trainers would keep one of their pokémon out near them... Anyway.

"Use swift at the wolf!" Charmer nips the fur at his shoulder and shoots the strands, now white-hot stars, at the side of the pokémon. The mightyena, as she can see now, reacts, distracted from its prey. The lupine form growls softly, raising the hair on its charcoal coat and giving Charmer a lean stare. The fire pokémon appears intimidated, but quickly composes himself.

"Good job, Charmer!" she encourages. "Now, will-o'-wisp!" The charmander blows blue-and-purple flames, dancing in the air around him. They fly to the mightyena, assailing its torso and singeing its ash grey coat in cold fire. The wolf lets out a cry of pain, then howls out in fury - it's hard to see in the dusk, but its crimson eyes likely have a fire in them themselves.

Two stat-effecting moves, but thankfully no damaging moves yet... "Don't let it scare you!" she says. "Finish it off with a dragon rage!" As Charmer nods, the light on his tail erupts into a blaze. He lets loose a red-orange fireball from his mouth; the mightyena tries to dodge, but it engulfs his tail end. When it looks like the wolf might still have some fight left in it, it shivers and collapses to one side, succumbing to its burn.

She grins and claps her hands together in glee. "That was great, Charmer! I knew you could do it!" She bends down and shares a high-five with the salamander pokémon, then turns to Len. "See? That was a pokémon battle. Pokémon aren't expected to battle where I'm from, in the Safari Zone, as often as most regions, but it still happens. Maybe when you get bigger, you can fight too." The igglybuff pouts; he apparently cares more for cooking than combat. With a wan smile, she remarks, "Well, you don't have to if you don't want to..."

She stands up and inspects the fallen mightyena. Still breathing, just unconscious... Using Charmer's flame for light, she pulls out a gold-colored spray bottle from her pack and spritzes it on the wolf's stomach. Her dad's favorite pokémon were mightyena, so she knew a bit about them - they were extremely loyal to trainers who could best them, so maybe she could convince... him, apparently, to come with her. They also travel in packs... a cursory glance revealed none others waiting in the shadows; perhaps this was a lone wolf?

She turns to the nidoran burrow and kneels down. "Hello?" she calls into the dark. "It's okay, the big bad wolf can't hurt you anymore; I took care of him. Would you like to come out?"

(( ftr to spectators, surskitty said I could defeat the mightyena :x ))

 

[surskitty]

(( @DARKSONG: Sorry but I've been reaaaaaally drained lately. I'll get to it! Eventually! ))

It's not entirely alone; a few hungry poochyena watch carefully from an entirely different hole, their snouts poking up after the battle's over. They don't seem that willing to approach, though: you did, after all, just beat up a mightyena. The biggest one woofs softly, then sinks back into the hole.

The nidoran doesn't seem to be particularly friendly. At least, it's aiming a few poison barbs at you and hissing. It's probably worried that you're going to try to eat it, too...

... or possibly it's not very fond of the much-louder caw of "YAAAAAAAAAAA!" as (a? the same one?) murkrow circles hopefully. The murkrow, too, doesn't approach, but it's still kind of annoying.

 

[Mewtwo]

FEMALE WURMPLE GET

 

[Clover]

(( @DARKSONG: Sorry but I've been reaaaaaally drained lately. I'll get to it! Eventually! ))

It's not entirely alone; a few hungry poochyena watch carefully from an entirely different hole, their snouts poking up after the battle's over. They don't seem that willing to approach, though: you did, after all, just beat up a mightyena. The biggest one woofs softly, then sinks back into the hole.

The nidoran doesn't seem to be particularly friendly. At least, it's aiming a few poison barbs at you and hissing. It's probably worried that you're going to try to eat it, too...

... or possibly it's not very fond of the much-louder caw of "YAAAAAAAAAAA!" as (a? the same one?) murkrow circles hopefully. The murkrow, too, doesn't approach, but it's still kind of annoying.

She stands back up and frowns uncertainly. "Hmmm." She doesn't want to attack the murkrow if she doesn't have to - she already has one, and if she fainted it and left it it might get eaten. If only... Oh!

She rummages through the same pocket she took the full heal out of, and pulls out a box about the size and shape of a tackle box. Dancing her fingers down the compartments, she mentions as an aside to Len, "Sorry, I know I just said that you didn't have to battle if you didn't want to, but if you could just help me out for a second... ah, here we go." She removes two blue-and-grey berries from the berry box and hands one to Charmer, breaking open the other under her foot.

Picking up Len and raising his lightweight body high above her head, she aims him towards the murkrow and explains, "If you can put him to sleep from here, then that should solve our problems!" She could just have him put the nidoran to sleep, but that bird is really annoyingly annoying. And even if the raven pokémon is too high to be affected, it should still get the nidoran and maybe even one of those poochyena; two birds one stone, sort of.

"Once he starts, start eating that berry," she instructs Charmer. Chesto berries were super hard - easy enough for pokémon teeth, but she had to crack the shell to get to the softer meat inside for her own. Looking back up to Len: "Now, Len! Sing!"

As he begins his serenade, Midnight nibbles the chesto berry and thinks, I should find him a tiny megaphone. Hee.

 

[Mad MOAI]

I'd like to go to the Fields of Meat please... *donates $4*

 

[surskitty]

OKAY BACKLOG (I'll get to Midnight in a bit)~

$X to go wherever is the most interesting/wacky, por favor.

Gogogo Cottonbutt the Swablu.

Out of a lack of anything better to do, you wander into a kitchen that smells faintly of sweet potatoes. There's no one in there, but you do find a funny-looking set of binoculars on the counter. I wonder who left them...?

You then go to explore the Fields of Meat because it seems to be the happening thing to do today. While you don't find anywhere particularly interesting (better luck next time!), you do come across a skunk. Thankfully, Cottonbutt contributes a Defog when it does a fine job polluting the place, so you grab the stunky and move on. Sadly, the only thing of note you find after the stunky is a rattata. Oh well.

Obtained one (1) silph scope, one (1) female stunky, one (1) female rattata.

I guess I'll head to the field of meat, since I'm hungry...

I place $4 in the tip jar and head on out... kind of nervous but also curious. At least I have Swinub, and Torchic, and Luxio...

More than one Pokemon with you, huh? Probably a smart move, really, though you might scare off some Pokemon that'd normally bother you.

Like a zubat! Hopefully you didn't actually want said zubat; it flies away after spotting the luxio. Maybe it's Intimidating.

The torchic claws at a patch of ground, revealing a sleeping clam. What's a shellder doing in a field? Oh well; you grab it anyway. It might not have noticed. It certainly doesn't complain.

You also find a ghost! -- have fun. Unfortunately, only the luxio has any skill at hitting the thing, so while the luxio defeats it eventually, you decide it probably best to turn back.

Obtained one (1) male shellder and one (1) male misdreavus.

I'd like to go to the Fields of Meat please... *donates $4*

It seems sort of busy today!

You have an ominous feeling for a moment, but it passes. There's a UFO somewhere in the distance. You could try getting its attention...?

... or you could go make friends with the koffing and wobbuffet to your left.

It's up to you.

 

[surskitty]

She stands back up and frowns uncertainly. "Hmmm." She doesn't want to attack the murkrow if she doesn't have to - she already has one, and if she fainted it and left it it might get eaten. If only... Oh!

She rummages through the same pocket she took the full heal out of, and pulls out a box about the size and shape of a tackle box. Dancing her fingers down the compartments, she mentions as an aside to Len, "Sorry, I know I just said that you didn't have to battle if you didn't want to, but if you could just help me out for a second... ah, here we go." She removes two blue-and-grey berries from the berry box and hands one to Charmer, breaking open the other under her foot.

Picking up Len and raising his lightweight body high above her head, she aims him towards the murkrow and explains, "If you can put him to sleep from here, then that should solve our problems!" She could just have him put the nidoran to sleep, but that bird is really annoyingly annoying. And even if the raven pokémon is too high to be affected, it should still get the nidoran and maybe even one of those poochyena; two birds one stone, sort of.

"Once he starts, start eating that berry," she instructs Charmer. Chesto berries were super hard - easy enough for pokémon teeth, but she had to crack the shell to get to the softer meat inside for her own. Looking back up to Len: "Now, Len! Sing!"

As he begins his serenade, Midnight nibbles the chesto berry and thinks, I should find him a tiny megaphone. Hee.

"Purupuru, purupururin~ purupuru pururin~ purupuru purupururinnnnnn~" it sings.

"KARAAAAAAAA," the murkrow shrieks as it flies off, dropping ... a pin? Thankfully, it flees before its Uproar can keep the rabbit and puppies awake. No bird, but you could easily pick up the nidoran. As for the poochyena ... you could probably go grab one or two, but odds are the murkrow will come back for its prize if you do and if you grab the pin first, they'll wake up.

You've probably got the mightyena either way, though!


Obtained one (1) male mightyena and one (1) male nidoran.

(( I was going to have it drop something else but I refreshed two or three times and kept getting the pin. I guess it's a sign. ))

 

[Mad MOAI]

You have an ominous feeling for a moment, but it passes. There's a UFO somewhere in the distance. You could try getting its attention...?

... or you could go make friends with the koffing and wobbuffet to your left.

It's up to you.

I ponder for a moment, then decide to make friends. Better friends than enemies.

 

[surskitty]

The water moccasin bites!

Wait, no. The two pokémon seem disinclined to let you approach, but they're not attacking and they're not moving away. The koffing doesn't seem to like you particularly (it's possibly glaring, though they look so naturally cheerful...! It's hard to tell), but the wobbuffet waves and squawks a "Wob~buffet!"

... Oh. You have lunch with you. After sharing a little, they decide to follow you!

Obtained one (1) male wobbuffet, one (1) female koffing, and one (1) shiny rock!

 

[nyuu]

Hey! Fields of Meat with er. Totodile!

 

[surskitty]

(( ... I don't even know why I have this in my generator. ))

After wandering around for a while, you find ... well, actually it's a bit hard to tell. It seems to be a soggy lump of fabric, and it keeps saying "WHYYYYYYYYYYY?" The totodile pokes it, then bites experimentally. It tastes bad.

So you go to help out whatever's DOUBTING THE EXISTENCE OF A KIND AND LOVING GOD! ... It's a wynaut and it loves you instantly. It takes a bit to figure out what the fabric is, though. It smells like mildew. ... for some reason, you decide to keep it.

Obtained one (1) female wynaut and ... a couple of James's old disguises. There are name tags.

 

[Clover]

"Purupuru, purupururin~ purupuru pururin~ purupuru purupururinnnnnn~" it sings.

"KARAAAAAAAA," the murkrow shrieks as it flies off, dropping ... a pin? Thankfully, it flees before its Uproar can keep the rabbit and puppies awake. No bird, but you could easily pick up the nidoran. As for the poochyena ... you could probably go grab one or two, but odds are the murkrow will come back for its prize if you do and if you grab the pin first, they'll wake up.

You've probably got the mightyena either way, though!


Obtained one (1) male mightyena and one (1) male nidoran.

(( I was going to have it drop something else but I refreshed two or three times and kept getting the pin. I guess it's a sign. ))

She yawns once, but the berry and the continuingly irritating crow keep Len's song at bay. She throws the baby pokémon up into the air and he giggles. "Great job, Len! I knew I could count on you." Placing him down, she inspects the nidoran, removing him carefully from the burrow while watching for those poison barbs. She doesn't care to feed him a berry with those teeth and claws and pointy-ow bits, so she removes another full heal and a super potion.

She sprays the mightyena first. The wolf shudders, opens his eyes, and stretches out forwards and back before growling quietly and carefully making eye contact. She holds the stare silently until he averts his eyes down; she pets him on the shoulder. "Good boy, good boy... Lang," she says, naming him the Chinese word for wolf and probably botching the pronunciation stellarly. "Now listen-- neh! Eyes here!" she snaps as he sniffs and looks hungrily at the sleeping nidoran. "We do not eat other team members."

She scrunches her nose and scratches her head uncertainly. "Well, I mean... you will join me, right? I don't have a pokéball or anything." Lang sits on his haunches and barks once. She grins. "Thanks! Okay, wait there while I fix up this guy." Lang trots over to Charmer and Len where they greet each other.

As she spritzes the poison point pokémon, he yawns and opens his red eyes sleepily... until he comes to, frightened and darting his eyes to find an escape route. She takes a knee and holds up her hands in surrender. "Wait, please wait! Look, I'm not going to hurt you, and if you come with me, I promise you won't get eaten." She extends her hand; the nidoran looks up warily, but cautiously extends his paw in a makeshift shake. She smiles again. "Thank you~! I promise you'll have a good time." She looks behind her at her accruing number of pokémon. "Well, I don't have any free pokéballs, and... okay, here. Please don't sting me," she adds as she hups him up in her arms. He flattens his spikes down as much he can, and she helps the much lighter igglybuff onto her head.

"Okay," she says, "now that that's worked out..." She notices something glinting off Charmer's tail flame and picks it up. Some kind of badge? She shrugs and throws it in her bag, then gazes up to the sky where the murkrow flew off. Something about that bird... It could be heading to someplace with people. A mail bird or something. She shrugs. "Not like I had any place in mind anyways," she says as she follows its path, getting increasingly hungry and tired.

 

[surskitty]

Obtained one (1) small yellow G-shaped pin! ... Yes, it's exactly what you'd think it is.

The murkrow probably flew off to the main building, or at least that's where you end up. Isn't deus ex machina wonderful?

 

[Coloursfall]

Well this looks mighty interesting! I think I'll head to the uh. Fields...of...Meat. That's odd. C'mon Vaan, my trusty Umbreon! We shall adventure! *flings money in proper receptacle*

 

[surskitty]

It's a bright and wonderful day! ... Or something like that. The fog is cleared for now, anyway.

So you go on a magical and wonderful adventure! The umbreon seems keen to follow -- you're not actually sure what. It clearly smells something, though.

And so! You find ... a wobbuffet. It's a wonderful week with wobbuffet, eh? Vaan seems to decide that it's best to just Confuse Ray it until it'll wander into your bag (aren't wobbuffet a bit big?) and everything works out. Or something.

Since that didn't really tire the umbreon at all, you ... keep going! Hurray!

... Well, you figure out what it wanted to find: there is a sad slowpoke. It has its delicious tail! -- but it is short. So you make friends! TADAAAAAAA man I have no idea what to type for these things \o/

Obtained one (1) male wobbuffet and one (1) female slowpoke.

 

[Clover]

Obtained one (1) small yellow G-shaped pin! ... Yes, it's exactly what you'd think it is.

The murkrow probably flew off to the main building, or at least that's where you end up. Isn't deus ex machina wonderful?

She gapes at the building, thoughts like FINALLY I KNOW WHERE I AM and wasn't this place on an island in a forest on a hill and about a half-dozen other implausible things before? and oh yeah, those clefairy, /so/ great at teleporting! they can get you within a whole /five miles/ of where you were, fan freaking tastic! and this is the house of the hungry guy isn't it, I guess that means there's no food and there's no way in /hell/ I'm checking the kitchen being pulled out like so many pick-up sticks before the marbles finally crash to the bottom of the cup. Catching her second wind, she hoofs it inside, passing the damned telephone and the blasted kitchen and down those rotten stairs until she hears the hum of fluorescent lights and the metallic rattle of bottlecaps being fiddled with by an extremely mopey person and then she sees him and points at him with an expression of disgust and accusation and and a hint of both overwhelming confusion and exhaustion and she says, "You."

So you haven't seen anyone all day and you just got done pulling all the string shot out of your hair and you're minding your own business when this girl bursts down into your room with an igglybuff gripping her curls, a nidoran chittering from the arm that's not the one currently swung in your direction with the hand at the end of it all up in your face, flanked by a charmander who's not all that sure what his trainer is angry about but if she's angry so is he, and a rather frightening mightyena with rather frightening teeth.

And then words start tumbling out of her mouth like they can't get out fast enough, words that by the way make negative sense like "WHY WERE THERE CLEFAIRY IN YOUR KITCHEN do you know how much i've gone through today because of those CLEFAIRY i mean i guess it was kind of fun at the time but it was also EXTREMELY WEIRD cause i mean i sure didn't wake up this morning expecting to be ABDUCTED by CLEFAIRY and cleffa and clefable and this guy" - she pauses from her increasingly frantic flailing to point to the igglybuff - "and so now i might be the AMBASSADOR or something i don't even know for a bunch of ALIENS and that might sound crazy but that's just cause it IS crazy that there was CLEFAIRY with a STABBITY HAT and he has a SISTER and there are ROCKS in CAVES and also GHOSTS in HOUSES and TEAM ROCKET and TELEPORTS and MIGHTYENA and NIDORAN" - respective gestures - "and EXTREMELY IRRITATING CROWS and WEIRD BADGES and now i'm HERE and tired and hungry and i demand an explanation and also water if you have any."

She trails off quieter and quieter as she reaches the end of her explanation and sags to the floor. Slouching up, she pulls out a forgotten bag of strawberry taffy from the depths of her bag and, after giving a piece to the igglybuff (the others don't care for any), chews with a stern look at the blue-haired man that implies whether he receives some for himself depends heavily on his answer in the next few minutes.

 

[surskitty]

She gapes at the building, thoughts like FINALLY I KNOW WHERE I AM and wasn't this place on an island in a forest on a hill and about a half-dozen other implausible things before? and oh yeah, those clefairy, /so/ great at teleporting! they can get you within a whole /five miles/ of where you were, fan freaking tastic! and this is the house of the hungry guy isn't it, I guess that means there's no food and there's no way in /hell/ I'm checking the kitchen being pulled out like so many pick-up sticks before the marbles finally crash to the bottom of the cup. Catching her second wind, she hoofs it inside, passing the damned telephone and the blasted kitchen and down those rotten stairs until she hears the hum of fluorescent lights and the metallic rattle of bottlecaps being fiddled with by an extremely mopey person and then she sees him and points at him with an expression of disgust and accusation and and a hint of both overwhelming confusion and exhaustion and she says, "You."

So you haven't seen anyone all day and you just got done pulling all the string shot out of your hair and you're minding your own business when this girl bursts down into your room with an igglybuff gripping her curls, a nidoran chittering from the arm that's not the one currently swung in your direction with the hand at the end of it all up in your face, flanked by a charmander who's not all that sure what his trainer is angry about but if she's angry so is he, and a rather frightening mightyena with rather frightening teeth.

And then words start tumbling out of her mouth like they can't get out fast enough, words that by the way make negative sense like "WHY WERE THERE CLEFAIRY IN YOUR KITCHEN do you know how much i've gone through today because of those CLEFAIRY i mean i guess it was kind of fun at the time but it was also REALLY WEIRD cause i mean i sure didn't wake up this morning expecting to be ABDUCTED by CLEFAIRY and cleffa and clefable and this guy" - she pauses from her increasingly frantic flailing to point to the igglybuff - "and so now i might be the AMBASSADOR or something i don't even know for a bunch of ALIENS and that might sound crazy but that's just cause it IS crazy that there was CLEFAIRY with a STABBITY HAT and he has a SISTER and there are ROCKS in CAVES and also GHOSTS in HOUSES and TEAM ROCKET and TELEPORTS and MIGHTYENA and NIDORAN" - respective gestures - "and REALLY IRRITATING CROWS and WEIRD BADGES and now i'm HERE and tired and hungry and i demand an explanation and also water if you have any."

She trails off quieter and quieter as she reaches the end of her explanation and sags to the floor. Slouching up, she pulls out a forgotten bag of strawberry taffy from the depths of her bag and, after giving a piece to the igglybuff (the others don't care for any), chews with a stern look at the blue-haired man that implies whether he receives some for himself depends heavily on his answer in the next few minutes.

It's impressive how much retconning there can be in something with very little material! ... Or possibly the anonymous narrator has no memory and is only actually coherent if you ask. It's a mystery. And given that the clefairy were teleporting you from space, really they did pretty well! It's hard to be accurate when the ship's moving and the world's moving and they're moving at different speeds and directions. Given that you didn't land as a circle with a five mile radius, they're so awesome and you should give them many many hugs except not really because they will probably Meteor Mash you. But you definitely owe them one. ... well, they probably think you owe them one, anyway.

He jumps when he notices you and stops sulking, then starts to reach for a pokéball after seeing that you're Not Happy, possibly insane, and with Not Happy pokémon, but he stops and accidentally drops a few bottlecaps. Life sucks.

"I have no idea what you're talking about --!" he starts to say while you rant, but he seems to decide that maybe he should just ... let you rant. Even though he'd much prefer it if you took out your horrible day of horrible horrible alien abductions (IT COULD BE WORSE!!) on someone not-him. ... Also, his expression makes it pretty clear he thinks you're 87% crazy. (It'd be higher, but he's familiar with clefairy ships. ... Also with greys. He's intimately familiar with greys. He is best alien.)

After you finish, he sighs and says, "One sec!" before he runs (surprisingly quickly) to who-knows-where and returns with a water bottle, some hot water, and a packet of instant ramen (pick one). He hands you the bottle -- it's pretty cold; there's probably a faucet somewhere -- and sets the ramen-in-water down next to him. He's not about to hand hot water to a crazy person. "Um. What? All I got out of that was 'clefairy' and 'Team Rocket'."


(( ... Sigh. ))