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The "Fwee" thread II
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RespectTheBlade
rage against the dying of the light
RavenMarkku
Gone.
Arylett Charnoa
Barely existent.
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Re: The "Fwee" Thread, Mk II
You never notice it, but maybe, you're not alone after all. You're not as alone as you think. When everyone around you seems so distant, and you're so trapped inside of yourself, too trapped to reach out... when you do, you see that somebody was so much more than you thought they were.
When you reach out, you realize that this person has pain like you do. And it's not just the typical pain like most people have, the School Is Annoying, or I'm So Stressed Out With Being Busy that you hear so often that it has no effect on you. It's pain that's very real to you, and they have it too. And you thought you'd never find somebody who understands, or shares your pain. You just felt so isolated from everything, you know? Like nobody really understands... you wanted to get away, and everyone to leave you alone. So much anger and hatred...
Then you reach out... and... something happens inside of your cold heart. Your heart that hasn't beat so much in a really long time. Because you've changed. Your heart has been broken, again and again, and it's turned cold and numb. You can't feel much about anybody anymore, even if you want to. It's all pretending and faking... and lies... but then when you reach out to this person... it's like... you thought your heart was dead. But something comes alive. And you feel, for the first time in a long time, that the words you're saying are true and sincere. These words are what you really feel. They aren't anything brought on by a random change of mood, they aren't your attempt to hide away from everyone. They're real. And... you think... "Hey... maybe I can be kind after all..." Because you feel the kindness you used to have... you feel it come back again. That genuine desire to connect to somebody else.
And you don't really know what's going to happen after this... the wounds that have happened are still here. They haven't healed and it still hurts... and it's still cold... but after the blizzard, to know that you could still feel some warmth... that you were CAPABLE of feeling like you did again... well, hell, I think that's enough for you.
(If you didn't get that, I actually tried COMMUNICATING with a person about how I felt about them. And no, it isn't romantic or a crush... it was actually telling them something negative that they did that really put me off. And then we just sort of had this discussion into the night about that and a lot of things, without me being yelled at or anything, and they showed me that... they were really more than I thought they were. And then because of this, this numbness I've had about people seemed to fade for that moment, and I... actually felt sincere for the first time in a really long time. I said something really sincere. And it's just a relief to me to know that I can still have that feeling, even if the pain's still there. It also just made me feel a lot better in general, because they also said some really good things.)
Oh and I didn't watch the Superbowl.
You never notice it, but maybe, you're not alone after all. You're not as alone as you think. When everyone around you seems so distant, and you're so trapped inside of yourself, too trapped to reach out... when you do, you see that somebody was so much more than you thought they were.
When you reach out, you realize that this person has pain like you do. And it's not just the typical pain like most people have, the School Is Annoying, or I'm So Stressed Out With Being Busy that you hear so often that it has no effect on you. It's pain that's very real to you, and they have it too. And you thought you'd never find somebody who understands, or shares your pain. You just felt so isolated from everything, you know? Like nobody really understands... you wanted to get away, and everyone to leave you alone. So much anger and hatred...
Then you reach out... and... something happens inside of your cold heart. Your heart that hasn't beat so much in a really long time. Because you've changed. Your heart has been broken, again and again, and it's turned cold and numb. You can't feel much about anybody anymore, even if you want to. It's all pretending and faking... and lies... but then when you reach out to this person... it's like... you thought your heart was dead. But something comes alive. And you feel, for the first time in a long time, that the words you're saying are true and sincere. These words are what you really feel. They aren't anything brought on by a random change of mood, they aren't your attempt to hide away from everyone. They're real. And... you think... "Hey... maybe I can be kind after all..." Because you feel the kindness you used to have... you feel it come back again. That genuine desire to connect to somebody else.
And you don't really know what's going to happen after this... the wounds that have happened are still here. They haven't healed and it still hurts... and it's still cold... but after the blizzard, to know that you could still feel some warmth... that you were CAPABLE of feeling like you did again... well, hell, I think that's enough for you.
(If you didn't get that, I actually tried COMMUNICATING with a person about how I felt about them. And no, it isn't romantic or a crush... it was actually telling them something negative that they did that really put me off. And then we just sort of had this discussion into the night about that and a lot of things, without me being yelled at or anything, and they showed me that... they were really more than I thought they were. And then because of this, this numbness I've had about people seemed to fade for that moment, and I... actually felt sincere for the first time in a really long time. I said something really sincere. And it's just a relief to me to know that I can still have that feeling, even if the pain's still there. It also just made me feel a lot better in general, because they also said some really good things.)
Oh and I didn't watch the Superbowl.
Last edited:
voltianqueen
Moumantai, moumantai
ignore_this_acct
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speedblader03
Don't read this
Silver
I am the master of cakes
Re: The "Fwee" Thread, Mk II
Soo, today started off normal.
First I went to my electives. Helped the teachers and they all told me I was so sweet for helping them. (made me happy. :3) Then...we went to math. Starts normal, check homework, talk about today, do the lesson. Today we were watching a video in class about math and my friend gave me and our table lolipops.
Ok, so the teacher walks out of the classroom about halfway through the video to do something leaving us by ourselves. Well, this one boy starts to talk about me, I get angry and threaten him and he stops. Then he says something very insulting about me.
(this is where the fun begins.) I jumped out of my seat and say/yell at him, and I quote, "Shut your fucking mouth right now before I punch you in the goddamn face." He pretty much ran away from me, the girl screaming at him with a lolipop in her hand while she was shaking so much, and I would have punched him if I wasn't held back. I went back to my seat while the one boy was hidden behind someone. So I'm sitting down with my hand shaking (and a broken pencil in the other since I broke it) and the teacher walks in.
Then his little friend says something else about me, and the girl sitting next to him stood up for me. The teacher asks what happens, and I tell her I almost got violent, and she goes into a speech about bullying and stands up for me. His little friends says, "But I didn't say anything!" The whole entire class stood up for me. And I had to step out of the room just to stop myself from lunging at him, I was so angry I started crying too.
Well, later he got hisself in trouble for making someone else cry and got sent to ISS (in school suspension). And someone had to bring his stuff to him and told me he was in the back of the room crying. That made my day (knowing how mean that was, but.) as well as the class standing up for me. So all in all, it was a good day :3
Soo, today started off normal.
First I went to my electives. Helped the teachers and they all told me I was so sweet for helping them. (made me happy. :3) Then...we went to math. Starts normal, check homework, talk about today, do the lesson. Today we were watching a video in class about math and my friend gave me and our table lolipops.
Ok, so the teacher walks out of the classroom about halfway through the video to do something leaving us by ourselves. Well, this one boy starts to talk about me, I get angry and threaten him and he stops. Then he says something very insulting about me.
(this is where the fun begins.) I jumped out of my seat and say/yell at him, and I quote, "Shut your fucking mouth right now before I punch you in the goddamn face." He pretty much ran away from me, the girl screaming at him with a lolipop in her hand while she was shaking so much, and I would have punched him if I wasn't held back. I went back to my seat while the one boy was hidden behind someone. So I'm sitting down with my hand shaking (and a broken pencil in the other since I broke it) and the teacher walks in.
Then his little friend says something else about me, and the girl sitting next to him stood up for me. The teacher asks what happens, and I tell her I almost got violent, and she goes into a speech about bullying and stands up for me. His little friends says, "But I didn't say anything!" The whole entire class stood up for me. And I had to step out of the room just to stop myself from lunging at him, I was so angry I started crying too.
Well, later he got hisself in trouble for making someone else cry and got sent to ISS (in school suspension). And someone had to bring his stuff to him and told me he was in the back of the room crying. That made my day (knowing how mean that was, but.) as well as the class standing up for me. So all in all, it was a good day :3
Shiny Grimer
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Re: The "Fwee" Thread, Mk II
So yeah, everybody should see the 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee. Because I saw it today. And it was awesome.
I swear, I was on the verge of tears for this one song. And I was not alone in almost crying (one kid actually ended up crying). It was sad, it was funny, and it was... great. I really want to see it again.
(then again I have a very immature sense of humor so~ and I admit it's not theater for the ages. But hey, it was fun and it made me feel something and that's more than I can say for a lot of works)
So yeah, everybody should see the 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee. Because I saw it today. And it was awesome.
I swear, I was on the verge of tears for this one song. And I was not alone in almost crying (one kid actually ended up crying). It was sad, it was funny, and it was... great. I really want to see it again.
(then again I have a very immature sense of humor so~ and I admit it's not theater for the ages. But hey, it was fun and it made me feel something and that's more than I can say for a lot of works)
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