• Welcome to The Cave of Dragonflies forums, where the smallest bugs live alongside the strongest dragons.

    Guests are not able to post messages or even read certain areas of the forums. Now, that's boring, don't you think? Registration, on the other hand, is simple, completely free of charge, and does not require you to give out any personal information at all. As soon as you register, you can take part in some of the happy fun things at the forums such as posting messages, voting in polls, sending private messages to people and being told that this is where we drink tea and eat cod.

    Of course I'm not forcing you to do anything if you don't want to, but seriously, what have you got to lose? Five seconds of your life?

The QUILTBAG Club (formerly the LGBT club)

Phantom

Uh, I didn't do it.
Hi, I'm Phantom, I like women. And am a woman.


Wait, you guys knew that.

Anywho, I got hugged by a person today. They were visiting the hospital and they were obviously trans, mtf. Pre-everything. Their ID still said a male name, but I noticed a friend call her by a female name and pronoun. I had to ask for ID. They were obviously a little embarassed by it. When I handed it back to her, and the visitor pass, I said to have a nice day 'm'am'. When she left she saw me on patrol and asked if she could hug me. I let her hug me, and she said she was nervous that I would call her out on it or something. I just explained I was LGBT too and understood.

All in all, mission accomplished. It could have ended up messy, but it all worked out.
 

kyeugh

the world is just a sphere
Pronoun
she/her
I found this place while trying to search for something. Coincidence, or stroke of luck?

Either way, hello everyone... I'm not exactly sure how to introduce myself here, or even if I'm allowed to. Regardless, I'll get to the meat and potatoes.

I am a male. Physically, at least. I have never been happy with it, and for the longest time, I have wished to be female. As for sexuality, I like everyone. Male, female, trans, and if it were possible, the genderless. I am into a person for their personality (Looks, intelligence and such are just icing on the cake

... Sorry if this is a random, scatterbrained opening. I am simply unsure of what to say/do here. This is my first time talking about this particular subject in public.
Hey, this is news! And actually really cool. If it's any help, I'm a non-binary panromantic/asexual, which I guess is kind of a mouthful.

Phantom, that's… super cool. How often do things like this happen to you? It's certainly because I live in a military base, I think, but I've never seen anyone trans* outside.
 
Last edited:

Orchestra

Musical Luxray
Pronoun
they
From what the description you've given us is, it seems to me that you're MtF (male-to-female) transgender, and pansexual, so yeah, you'll be right at home in this thread. (Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong, though.)
No, you're right on the money there.

Hey, this is news! And actually really cool. If it's any help, I'm a non-binary panromantic/asexual, which I guess is kind of a mouthful.
*Goes to look up Panromantic* I feel terrible that I didn't know that. Yet there are still many I don't know, so it was bound to happen.

Hey there Dazel. Fancy running into you here. And that sounds like something I might be, actually. I do enjoy affection and closeness, yet I don't really care about anything sexual (Ignoring the fact that I have both a dirty mouth and mind. *Chuckles*) That is pretty cool though. I knew you were something, but I didn't know what exactly.
 

kyeugh

the world is just a sphere
Pronoun
she/her
Hey there Dazel. Fancy running into you here. And that sounds like something I might be, actually. I do enjoy affection and closeness, yet I don't really care about anything sexual (Ignoring the fact that I have both a dirty mouth and mind. *Chuckles*)
Presumably you mean asexuality, in which case, yeah. It still confuses a lot of my friends because, "I don't believe you. How can you not want to sex?? You're a male adolescent, clearly you want in." Which is just... generally shitty, I guess. It always struck me as odd how insensitive people who ~claim to be allies or accepting~ can actually be.
That is pretty cool though. I knew you were something, but I didn't know what exactly.
Ha, oh, I'm something all right...
 

Orchestra

Musical Luxray
Pronoun
they
Presumably you mean asexuality, in which case, yeah. It still confuses a lot of my friends because, "I don't believe you. How can you not want to sex?? You're a male adolescent, clearly you want in." Which is just... generally shitty, I guess. It always struck me as odd how insensitive people who ~claim to be allies or accepting~ can actually be.
Asexuality or Panromantic (Unless the description I found for it was wrong) And yes, I'm sick of that too. Friends, and even family seem to think just because you're a male, you only think with the head between your legs. That is their problem though. It'll get to you, sure. It gets to all of us, but the best you can do is shrug it off and move on. At least in the end, you know how you truly are. If they don't get it, it's their loss.

Ha, oh, I'm something all right...
Heh, I didn't mean anything bad by that. From how you talked about certain subjects, I figured you were at least gay, but asexual was certainly an interesting twist.
 

Dar

oops, did it again
Pronoun
they
Presumably you mean asexuality, in which case, yeah. It still confuses a lot of my friends because, "I don't believe you. How can you not want to sex?? You're a male adolescent, clearly you want in." Which is just... generally shitty, I guess. It always struck me as odd how insensitive people who ~claim to be allies or accepting~ can actually be.
My best friend is in the exact same boat as you (aside from the fact that she is biologically female) so I understand what you're going through. I've always found that asexuality is one of the most misunderstood orientations, which I've always found odd.
 

kyeugh

the world is just a sphere
Pronoun
she/her
My best friend is in the exact same boat as you (aside from the fact that she is biologically female) so I understand what you're going through. I've always found that asexuality is one of the most misunderstood orientations, which I've always found odd.
Yeah, you'd think it'd be the simplest. Like, instead of "only this" or "only that," it's just "no." I guess it's hard for more sexual people to understand, though, because... sex is super important to some people, apparently.
 

Gevaisa

Show us your qualia
Pronoun
any
Yeah, you'd think it'd be the simplest. Like, instead of "only this" or "only that," it's just "no." I guess it's hard for more sexual people to understand, though, because... sex is super important to some people, apparently.
I think it sort of makes sense, if you think about it. People don't have sex because they have a reason to have sex, they have sex because it's something they do instinctively. If you have that as one of your basic drives, someone telling you they don't have any inclination to have sex is akin to telling you that they don't have any inclination to eat, or sleep. The comparison does fall apart fairly quickly if you take it too literally, but the main reason people do both of those is instinctive. It's just not more or less the whole reason, like with sex.

This is all conjecture, admittedly, since I'm asexual myself. It's in line with what I've heard from not-asexual people, though.
 

Dar

oops, did it again
Pronoun
they
Yeah, you'd think it'd be the simplest. Like, instead of "only this" or "only that," it's just "no." I guess it's hard for more sexual people to understand, though, because... sex is super important to some people, apparently.
I've had people who thought my friend could reproduce without anyone else.
 

Phantom

Uh, I didn't do it.
Phantom, that's… super cool. How often do things like this happen to you? It's certainly because I live in a military base, I think, but I've never seen anyone trans* outside.
Meh, just common sense I think.

Actually, I could have gotten in trouble for that, which is why I'm saying how messy it could have been. She signed in under a female name. Her ID said a male name. She could, technically, be charged with using a fake name on an official document. I COULD have looked at the ID, noted what her friend called her, and looked at the paper, and denied her access because she failed to give proper ID. The fact that she was trans* was very obvious though, and I could see she looked worried when I asked for ID. Which is why I let it pass. Besides, I could still see she looked a bit like her photograph still.

Another thing that could have happened is if it was another guard, they might not have done the same. They might have said she could not visit her friend. Or they might have called her out on the 'wrong name' issue.

I live in the cities, so I run into it now and then. Since I've been working in the hospital I've run into these folks more often, but sadly this is mostly for psych holds. :/
 

Byrus

Strange days ahead
Posting this from a London hotel right now. I'm going to be admitted into hospital tonight at 6, and having surgery the next morning. I don't think I'll be able to post an update for a couple of days, since I need to keep my left arm elevated for at least 48 hours and I'll probably be in discomfort. So,um, yeah, I'm really hoping this turns out Alright! I'm nervous as hell, mostly just been reading and looking at youtube vids of cute animals to calm my nerves.
 

Emperor_Evulz

Sciiiieeeennnccceee
Pronoun
she
Posting this from a London hotel right now. I'm going to be admitted into hospital tonight at 6, and having surgery the next morning. I don't think I'll be able to post an update for a couple of days, since I need to keep my left arm elevated for at least 48 hours and I'll probably be in discomfort. So,um, yeah, I'm really hoping this turns out Alright! I'm nervous as hell, mostly just been reading and looking at youtube vids of cute animals to calm my nerves.
Be sure to avoid caffeine too unless you want a nervous breakdown, and good luck dude!
 

Byrus

Strange days ahead
Posting from hospital right now. Surgery went well. Holy shit, the first four days were really brutal though. I've never been through anything like this. Made the other surgery seem like a cakewalk. So sore. Would never recommend this operation except as a last resort for really severe dysphoria. Two days bedrest is nowhere near as. Fun as it sounds
 

shy ♡

whispers in gay
Wah Byrus I hope you feel better soon ;n; I'm glad the surgery went well though! I know surgery recovery from top-surgery was no fun so I can't imagine going through that... Take lots of pain killers and watch some cute movies and eat some chocolate...
 

Jolty

FOR THE YARD!!!!
Pronoun
he
Posting from hospital right now. Surgery went well. Holy shit, the first four days were really brutal though. I've never been through anything like this. Made the other surgery seem like a cakewalk. So sore. Would never recommend this operation except as a last resort for really severe dysphoria. Two days bedrest is nowhere near as. Fun as it sounds
hope you're feeling better soon man, glad it went well though!
 

Byrus

Strange days ahead
Thanks, guys, I really appreciate it. This surgery really took a lot out of me. I don't think I fully anticipated how difficult it would be. My lack of independence at the moment is making me feel very anxious and vulnerable, but I'm slowly getting there.

My physiotherapist was very helpful, and was talking to me about how she'd dealt with trans guys having this surgery for just over ten years. It was very interesting and she really helped me feel more at ease.

I flew back home on Sunday and am keeping in touch with the London docs by email. These annoying fucking staples are going to be removed tomorrow by my gp, so hopefully that will give me more mobility.

Also, dear god, absolutely no one in London could understand my accent. It was very frustrating! All the nurses were friendly and polite though, which definitely helped. One of the doctors that came by was northern irish, so everyone else was asking him for tips on how to decipher my accent. (One person thought I was Scottish)
 

Knuddeluff

Cat Foetus Jesus
Pronoun
he
I feel I've been sinking further and further into the gay stereotype over the past few months.

Like, right now, I'm drinking a glass of red wine, listening to Taylor Swift on repeat, while I burn a scented candle.
 

Flora

local hellion
Pronoun
they/them
Hi friends!!! With a lot of help from my mom (who's known for a couple weeks now) I came out as bi to my dad and he took it super well!!!
 

Knuddeluff

Cat Foetus Jesus
Pronoun
he
Hi friends!!! With a lot of help from my mom (who's known for a couple weeks now) I came out as bi to my dad and he took it super well!!!
Holy crap congrats!

It's one of the hardest things to do, it's great that you got over that hurdle! :>
 

Ether's Bane

future Singaporean
Pronoun
he
Hi friends!!! With a lot of help from my mom (who's known for a couple weeks now) I came out as bi to my dad and he took it super well!!!
Good for you!

I had to come out my dad twice - the first time, he took it as "it's just a phase", but last year, I tried again, and he "got it", so to speak.
 
Top