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mewtini
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  • What about food and lodging?

    Do I seem that mature? That's a good sign~ .m.
    Good thing, to.

    You know how Grandma's stereotypically tell you their secret ingredient for cookies is love? Yeah, I added too much love to my comic to let it die. D:<
    Woah :o

    Ah, alright. It would be amusing if it turned out we knew each other irl, though.
    This is going to seem really awkward since you don't know me, but I saw your post in Coughing Cupboard and you said something about seeing church people tomorrow night. Would you happen to live in Canada, in Ontario? Probably answer over PM if you don't want people getting your personal information.
    It's fine even if you don't read it, I don't need compensation for the critique, I just wanted to write it!
    Hi, and thank you~! :o Good luck to you, too!

    I liked your characterization of Koutus in the first paragraph, it made her a thinking Pokemon instead of a battling machine! I think it would have been nice if it was a little more gradual from that to her being sure she would win, or maybe if she was a little less nervous in the beginning then it would seem less sudden? Also next time maybe think about characterizing the other Pokemon some, too! It's fine if you want to write it kind of from Koutus's point of view (and it's nice that way), but all Retsurai does is snarl - maybe you could give more clues as to what he's thinking! Tiny actions like backing away, narrowing eyes, flattening ears - things like that help the reader get a little more sense of how a character is feeling without stating it explicitly! Also I like this sentence "...Except what was she supposed to do again? Thu... Thu... Thunder... Thunderbolt! Yeah!" which tells the reader Retsurai was confused by the Signal Beam, and in a more natural way than just saying "And then Retsurai was confused."

    Also about the green moss thing, it seems better to mention that there wasn't any. I don't think it's required, because lots of refs don't put stuff like that into their notes, but as a battler, I think it's nice to see what's going on for myself rather than just trusting that the referee remembered to roll for that! Referees forget things and that's okay because no one's perfect, but if you usually share information like that, the battlers could help remind you! With that logic, I also like when referees say their numbers, what they rolled for critical hit, et cetera, but you don't have to put things like that down, either. You have to generate those things anyway, so it's no harder for you to keep them in the post, but it takes up space and can be a bit messy, too, so it's up to you - just something to think about! (also, green moss is under notes, but maybe it should be under arena notes?)

    Also Electroleviate is Magnet Rise! That took me ages to figure out.

    Um sorry for suddenly writing a critique of your reffing but you give people tips so I thought you might be interested in receiving them, too! I've admired your perseverance for a while now; you just keep trying every time the mock refs are put up again even though you're always turned down! So I hope all that practice eventually helps you become a real ref! You can do it!
    Report him.

    Still sticking with my "I don't post in the Coughing Cupboard thing", but do it.

    On a lighter topic, your mock reffing looks really good!
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