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Where do babies come from?

Raptor Jesus really does sell them. If you haven't seen that picture you're lame.

in other news, they come from Tailsy's mom
 
Nuuuu, silly,this is the story of the babby and where it really comes from.
Y'see, babbies are quite like us actually. How they are made is simple.
Adult gets drunk. He finds another drunk lady. You hear moaning, groaning, shivering, and whatnot. This is the signal for some little ground moles to start putting the "babby seed" in the ground. Next time the drunk lady eats a salad, she gets a babby nine months later.
Y'see? This also explains having babbies by accident. People edit the first parts, so everyont thinks it goes like this: "When a mommy and a daddy like each other, daddy pushed mommy against the wall *nasty nasty* and there!"
So you guys have been fed the wrong stuff.*nod.*
 
They emerge from the bowels of the earth, their tiny hands punching through the soil they are burried under while thunder cracks in the sky!
 
One day the King of All planted a seed that grew into the Baby Bush. He hired elves to water the babies, but they were already working for Santa, so he had to settle for storks.
 
Oh come on, everyone knows this.

They're aliens. They burrow into the mother's stomach while she's asleep, then feed off her for nine months until they decide to force themselves out her crotch. Painfully, I might add.
However, the reason they grow into regular humans: They're very stupid aliens, and ingest too much of the mother's DNA, which in turn replaces their own and turns them into a baby.

The sex is just there for show.
Don't let 'em tell you otherwise.
 
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