The LGBT Club

[Harlequin]

SO HEY GAYS I AM STILL ALIVE AND GAY

I am still incredibly single and in the closet. It is bad times, bad times I do say. HOWEVER I am starting university in like three weeks and apparently Cardiff has a decent LGBT group or whatever. My gay friend at Cardiff is no help there because he signed up and never went to a single meeting. OH WELL

hey Verne how is university? I SAW YOUR FACEBOOK STATUS and also it sucks with the whole body disconnect thing ; ;

 

[nyuu]

I asked this in the gay-debate thread, but this is more of a gay-interest than a gay-debate thing SO

dear queers: have any of you ~come out~ to friends or family? what was it like?

 

[Zuu]

dear queers: have any of you ~come out~ to friends or family? what was it like?

I told my mom to watch a certain movie (Momento) and I informed her that the lead actor, Guy Pearce, is cute.

she took a few moments to process it, laughed, told me not to mention it around my dad, and not a single fuck was given.

 

[...]

Posted this in the Homosexuality Debate thread too~

Six of my best friends know, and they don't treat me any different than they did before they knew; albeit cracking up whenever a guy who doesn't know about my bisexuality jokingly hugs me. Even my best best friend, who is homophobic though I didn't know when I came out to him, hardly cares. I don't get offended by homophobic comments or gay jokes either, which is good for those who don't know I'm bi because I'm not letting on to anything.

None of my family knows except maybe my sister who may or may not have caught on in passing, but she ain't even going to say anything until she knows fo show.

 

[Michi]

Umm I think it would be best for me to join, please? :P
In response to NWT, I'm bi and I've told three friends, but not my best friend. Who happens to by the guy I like. Sooooo yeah, he totally thinks I'm straight. :[
I plan to tell my family in oh, about 10 years maybe.

 

[spaekle]

Most of my good friends know I'm queer. No one at college does yet, but I hope to remedy this by joining the LGBT club next week!

I also came out to a teacher once. Or, well, I got outed. I was talking to her with a gay friend of mine about gay things, and she suddenly asks "so are you gay too, or...?" and my friend felt the need to answer for me all "LOL SPAEKLE'S A MAN!!!!111" at which point I had to explain to the teacher that I was queer-gendered. She didn't seem to mind, though it was never brought up again. She did make the friend who outed me apologize later though.

Very very in the closet at home. My parents have always been very "we love you and we'll do anything for you", but they're also very conservative and I know my dad sees transsexuals as crazy people with mental problems. Something tells me they'd probably think I'm just confused or something. Though if you look back on my life and put two and two together it really all kind of makes sense. Not sure if they'd get that or not.

 

[Jolty]

dear queers: have any of you ~come out~ to friends or family? what was it like?

friends: they're all cool beans with it, none of them see it as a big deal
family: dad thought it was a phase for years, now accepts it as legit lol, mum doesn't mind, siblings don't care.


more relevant things
>going to uni in less than 3 weeks, I have gotten my doctor to send them a letter confirming I am doing the gender reassignment thing (their words not mine)
>so I shall be on the uni's system as Brandon and not Rebecca
>I plan to join the LGBT society in fresher's week... but as a bisexual person not a transgendered person. I don't really want people knowing I'm trans herpderp

 

[Zeph]

I asked this in the gay-debate thread, but this is more of a gay-interest than a gay-debate thing SO

dear queers: have any of you ~come out~ to friends or family? what was it like?

Eh, may as well copy what I posted there (Also you seem to have linked to my post in that thread rather than yours).

Yeah, pretty much everybody I know knows I'm gay. It was a little weird at first but I'm fine with it now. It doesn't, uh, offend me when people attempt to make fun of me for it or anything either, it's pretty amusing really. And my friends always make mock-homophobic jokes about it (Like, uh, bad example but "No, you're incorrect, because you're gay" or whatever), which is all in good fun.

As for my family, yeah, they all know too and are fine with it, because having a liberal family is fun.

 

[nyuu]

(I wasn't sure if you'd repost! I want to put something in the other thread that's like "actually talk about this here" but idk we are equal opportunity posters it would seem)

I've never had to. I am ~vaguely bi I guess~ and sometimes I wish I could be a pretty princess c: but the thing is, whenever mom or dad bring up, say, hypotheticals about relationships or kids or something, they include both genders or keep it neutral. I've never done much to suggest I'm anything other than straight, which makes it doubly cool.

 

[Minish]

I'm out to pretty much everyone. It's just not a big deal for me, there was no real... coming out thing for me. My school friends are 90% queer for some reason so they don't care. In fact, we regularly poke fun at the non-queer members of our little group. >3

As for family... mum knows, threw a hissy fit of great raaaage and shoooock when she first found out and then got over it. Occasionally she'll go "ahaha well um it's not like this is relevant 'cause you won't exactly be having sex with MEN will you". I don't think she quite understands the concept of bisexuality. :| She's a bit odd about it but we don't exactly speak about my queerness so it's fine.

I haven't told my dad but if he hasn't figured out by this point he's a stranger man than I thought. Basically, nobody gives a crap about it. Me and my friends all came out at school in about... year 9 and people gave us hassle about it for a year or so but now nobody cares/has forgotten.

So. Yeah.

 

[...]

As for family... mum knows, threw a hissy fit of great raaaage and shoooock when she first found out and then got over it. Occasionally she'll go "ahaha well um it's not like this is relevant 'cause you won't exactly be having sex with MEN will you". I don't think she quite understands the concept of bisexuality. :| She's a bit odd about it but we don't exactly speak about my queerness so it's fine.

This is how I'd imagine my parents to be. Except with women instead of men. Sadly, at this point in my life if she found out, she'd be right.

 

[Bluberry Bat]

Pretty much anyone who may have known me previously knows both my 'issues'. I'm rather vocal about it really, as I really don't see a need to live a lie for some randoms nor friends alike. So far none have had a(n obvious) problem with it (sans my parents, what with the hateful spewing while trying to act like they care about me, but I have to /live/ with them.. until December. Heeeee~), but I'm of the vein that if they don't like it, they can shove it outright, because I see no need to deal with them. As far as being lesbian (Well, bi/pan, but since I've got an ~*OMG GIRLFRIEND*~ most will look past that utterly) it's not like I'm going to hide it from anyone, and for the same reasons.
For the most part, people will find out immediately, I'll gauge if they're okay with it; if not we never speak again, is so we never speak /of/ it again. So it tends to work for me.

 

[Dinru]

Friends have mostly been cool about it. Christian/conservative friend was all like "OMG U WILL BURN IN HELL DON'T TOUCH ME!!!11!" at first but he got over it and has shifted his beliefs a bit.

Close family is fine with it, but my mom is sometimes like "Well, what if you AREN'T? You can't know for sure..." Otherwise everyone's cool.

Extended family doesn't talk about it, except one uncle who lectures me and my sister regularly about how we've been lead down the "devil's path" and it isn't too late to "convert", and used to rant at my mom about how she's not raising us down the "right path" (i.e. Conservative Lutheran), until my mom pointed out that she hasn't been going down that path at all since she moved out at 16. He shut up about it; and this other cousin of mine thinks that my sexuality, as well as my general views of the world, are the coolest things since sliced bread.

People in general tend to be cool about it amongst the younger crowd, although there's the occasional immature person who will call me a whore/bitch/fence-sitter, or will accuse me of cheating on my boyfriend/accuse me of being an attention whore when I tell them I'm not dating anyone else. I've perfected a glance that can shut most people up, though. And most people who are older than me know better than to do anything in regards to my sexuality.

 

[Flazeah]

My immediate family - mother, father and brother - know I like women. Some friends do too. I'm thinking at the moment that I'm bisexual, but I'm not absolutely certain. Going to uni is going to be a very interesting time in my life - I hope I meet some awesome people at my uni's LGBT club. I guess I'll join as bi.

I did tell my mother a few weeks ago that I think I'm attracted to both after having told her previously that I only liked women, or something like that. She's probably told my dad what I've recently told her, so I'm assuming I don't need to tell him.

 

[see ya]

So I think I half-accidentally, half-intentionally came out to my dad. Either way, I'm pretty sure he knows now.

I remembered the aforementioned story with the lesbian with the gay pride pendant when he came to pick me up from work and I told him. He joked with me that I should find a nice girlfriend and run off to San Francisco. I shrugged and went "eh...", in a sort of "I could live with that" tone. Then he kind of sputtered for a brief second, and that's when I think he figured it out.

He also made a similar joke about a week later (when I bought my "come out come out wherever you are" shirt, saying that I might just get some offers, to which I made the same reply as I did his first joke), but he hasn't really confronted me about it directly yet. Nor do I know if he's told my stepmom. Whatever it is, he seems cool with it, like I knew he'd be. :3

 

[Dannichu]

>going to uni in less than 3 weeks, I have gotten my doctor to send them a letter confirming I am doing the gender reassignment thing (their words not mine)
>so I shall be on the uni's system as Brandon and not Rebecca
>I plan to join the LGBT society in fresher's week... but as a bisexual person not a transgendered person. I don't really want people knowing I'm trans herpderp

Please, ignore me if I'm being invasive.

How are you going to introduce yourself at uni? Will your lecturers/seminar leaders know you're trans if you're on the register as Brandon?

On the "who knows that you're LGBT?" thing, friends at uni know (most of them are gay themselves), family almost certianly knows but we've never had a sit-down and talk about it or anything, and friends at home pretty much all identify as heterosexual but have more crushes on/sexual fantasies about the same sex than I do (my straight sister wants to do all sorts with Hayley Williams).
So they know I like women (my love of Amber Benson is hardly secret), but I don't think they know I'm gay. They're an amusing group of people.

 

[shy ♡]

Hrr, excuse me as I post out of nowhere.

I don't like the concept of 'coming out'. Straight people aren't expected to come out. Why should anyone else? If you're LGBT, it's... it just is. If someone is close enough to you to know, they'll know it because 1. you talk about finding someone attractive, 2. you have a significant other of the gender you find attractive. Coming out just seems ridiculous to me.

This is why I get annoyed whenever my mom asks me. :v She has reached the point of thinking I don't know. Of course I know. I'm just annoyed at her constant questioning.

So, er - no, I'm not 'out', but I'm not 'in' either.

 

[Zhorken]

When I was fourteen, I told my little brother that I had some big secret. I got him to pay me $25 (in EB Games store credit he had) to tell him I was bi.

Other than that, I've only 'come out' by mentioning it offhand. I don't get much of a reaction most of the time. Mom was fascinated for a moment, asking me a bunch of questions—general things like "when did you realize", I forget exactly—but past that, nothing, really. I've never told dad, but I sort of suspect mom told him.

I don't think any of my extended family knows, and my friends just sort of... know. From seeing me talk about it. Even more offhand than usual, I guess.

 

[Minish]

I don't like the concept of 'coming out'. Straight people aren't expected to come out. Why should anyone else? If you're LGBT, it's... it just is. If someone is close enough to you to know, they'll know it because 1. you talk about finding someone attractive, 2. you have a significant other of the gender you find attractive. Coming out just seems ridiculous to me.

I see coming out just as a subtle change from being 'in' and being 'out'. Being out of the closet for me is feeling that if someone asks you what your sexuality is, you will give them an honest answer, that other people start to know, etc. For me, coming out is just transitioning from keeping it a relative secret to being open about it. Hence how you can be out to some people but not to all.

I think coming out has a different meaning now, as queerness becomes more accepted. It's still a relevant thing though, or at least I think so.

 

[ultraviolet]

I don't like the concept of 'coming out'. Straight people aren't expected to come out. Why should anyone else? If you're LGBT, it's... it just is. If someone is close enough to you to know, they'll know it because 1. you talk about finding someone attractive, 2. you have a significant other of the gender you find attractive. Coming out just seems ridiculous to me.

This is why I get annoyed whenever my mom asks me. :v She has reached the point of thinking I don't know. Of course I know. I'm just annoyed at her constant questioning.

So, er - no, I'm not 'out', but I'm not 'in' either.

I feel this too - I've never felt a great need to go and tell my family or anyone who doesn't know that I'm bisexual. I don't regularly talk about my sexuality with my family anyway so it's not like it's ever come up - but nearly all of my friends know, because we do talk about that stuff. I did kind of try to tell my mother about it a few years ago, but she told me it was a 'stage', and that she'd gone through the same thing and kissed a woman. :P But I don't really care or anything, I know she wouldn't care either. I guess I'm kind of lucky in that respect.