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What Pokemon move would you learn in real life?

Flash

Definitly NOT Sing. I can't sing worth crap.
Probably Pay Day. That way I could help my family and other families with the money problems.
Disable,so I can stop things from happening for a short period of time. (That could help with the oil spill.)
Ice Beam,so I can make Ice Creamz.
Dig,so I can dig a hold,and surf,so I can fill the hold with water. Pool Party!
Transform. DUN DUN DUNNN.
Confuse Ray,just 'cuz.
All the Dragon Type moves. Because Dragon's my favorite type.
Judgement for no appearant reason.
Metronome,just because It's coolz.

That's all I can thing of.
 
Fly-epic flying powers!!
Teleport-see Mind Reader
Protect-force fields
Mind Reader-doesn't need an explanation
Draco Meteor-No one's gonna lay a finger on my Butterfinger.
Flamethrower-I can control fire,
Hydro Pump-water,
Bullet Seed-grass,
Thunder-and electricity. Nice.
Thunder Wave-paralyze teachers = no homework
Confuse Ray-confuse teachers = no homework
Double Team-go to school and have clone do homework
Earthquake-see Teleport
Transform-see Mind Reader
Metronome-see Earthquake
Attract-woo hoo!!
 
Probably:

Transform: Lots of possibilities
Teleport: No explanation needed
Spacial Rend: Just because :)
 
Come on, guys:

1. Pfft, Attract. What's that good for?

2. Harden? String Shot? Pound? Everyone knows the dirtiest Pokemon move is Helping Hand :p
(or Spit Up/Swallow, if you're that way inclined)

Anyways, I lean towards Rest, obviously, and think Glare could be very useful in some situations. Growth, if it means additional tallness, is also a definite yes.
 
Fly: Simply for the thrill of flying. Teleport would be useful for long distances but not as fun as fly.
 
Vine Whip. Flash. Harden. Discharge.

I could go on for DAYS with all the perverted implications this question poses. But if I was being serious, the move I would most like to learn... Probably sucker punch. It would deal with all the bullies in school who get all over me for playing Pokemon.
 
I would probably learn fire/ice/thunderpunch, as well as sky uppercut. it would be fun to go into a boxing match. XD

also, no one needs to learn attacks like pound/doubleslap/wake-up slap etc, because most people can do that without knowing a move.
 
"Uh, da hurr hurr, I'd, like, learn some move that would let me turn all invisible n' stuff so i could get in on some invisi-groping action!!" Naw, seriously though... I'd probably learn transform. That would be pretty cool. Most of the damaging moves don't have much practical use beyond hurting stuff (duh.). Metronome would be kinda cool, but theres always the chance you accidentally fire off a hyper beam and blow up a school bus full of orphaned kittens or something. Mind Reader could be pretty cool, or Dream Eater.
EDIT: Nasty Plot. Charge. Harden. Wrap. Pound. Doubleslap. Pound. Pound. Gunk Shot.
 
-Fly, because it sounds fun
-Aqua ring, for more energy

Edit: Also:
-Attract lol
-Pay Day
-Rest!
 
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Gust- I've always wanted to control wind.
Icy Wind- Cold wind is even better~
Shock Wave- I've always wanted to control electricity.
Leaf Blade- I like leaves, so why not use them?
Leaf Storm- A ton of leaves is even better~
Dive- Because I can't swim.
 
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